Splitting up

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  • Splitting up
  • Premier Icon cinnamon_girl
    Subscriber

    mrmoofo – I really hope that you are an internet warrior and a nicer person in real life.

    Your comments are really quite nasty and offensive to some of us on here who have ongoing health issues.

    Do you honestly believe that the NHS does everything in their power for patients? If you do then you’re living in another world. I don’t consider myself needy but have had health issues for over 3.1/2 years. The NHS had done nothing to help me due to their ignorance of certain conditions.

    Your assumption that people choose to be ill and be needy is preposterous. You really wouldn’t want my life cos it’s an existence, that’s all.

    OP – apologies for diverting your thread.

    duirdh
    Member

    kinda proving his point ^^

    blurty
    Member

    I really hate to say this, and I sincerely hope I’m wrong, but has she met someone else?

    Best wishes for a reasonable resolution.

    mrmoofo
    Member

    mrmoofo – I really hope that you are an internet warrior and a nicer person in real life.

    No, I am much, much worse 😆

    Your comments are really quite nasty and offensive to some of us on here who have ongoing health issues.

    Do you honestly believe that the NHS does everything in their power for patients? If you do then you’re living in another world. I don’t consider myself needy but have had health issues for over 3.1/2 years. The NHS had done nothing to help me due to their ignorance of certain conditions.

    Your assumption that people choose to be ill and be needy is preposterous. You really wouldn’t want my life cos it’s an existence, that’s all.

    [/quote]

    mrmoofo
    Member

    Ok – editing that went very wrong
    So CG – no I don’t think that the NHS is a great service offering everything. But they do have to use professional judgement to assess a patient. They cannot treat peoople endlessly and with what ever the patient has read on the internet – because they are spending the taxpayers money. It has to have proof of working – and there is a process for that.

    Maybe they have turned down your requests because of this, I have no idea.

    FYI – the NHS played a huge part in both of my parents deaths …

    I’m not a horrible person – and I think less of you for suggesting that. I do, through life experience and travel, have a very strong innate bullshit detector. It has been wrong on very rare occassions. I been around too long to stomach some of todays meh, meh, meh needs wher everyone seems to think they are a celebrity.
    It’s life, it’s tough but get on and live it because it will have passed you by before to notice. That’s the coda I try and live by.

    You are castigating me for my comments, and as pointed out by the poster below your reply, it does somewhat prove my point. My points were not aimed at you, howevr you have taken it as that – as with everything on the internet they are generalisations, based in experience
    However, whatever you have, i wish you well and hope you get through and begin to enjoy life.

    More importantly I hope the OP gets things sorted so that he, and his child have happy lives

    A very warm and cuddly Mr Moofo

    woodlander
    Member

    Unfortunately there are too many families in that boat RJ. I sympathise with your friend because maybe it’s too eaay a path to take (if you’re looking to be the main provider et al).

    On the other hand, i/we have friends where one (normally the man) pursues the career path yet they remain totally solid as a couple (and family). I have no idea what the secret is. Likewise one of my mates is married with 3 kids (2, 4 and 10 yrs) – and they probably have the most varied life of anyone I know. He alone plays in a couple of bands and gigs around London, does martial arts, goes to concerts/festival weekenders, manages;/coaches his eldest’s school footy team, sits on the school Board, goes abroad with work, learns foreign languages, constantly improves his skills + works a 45hr week. She does her stuff and yet they all go abroad for about 4-6 weeks/yr too! And they’re always getting on. And they’ve no family within 200 miles to support them!

    I guess it just comes natural to some, more so if you’re in the absolute “right” relationship. The rest of us sometimes have to work bl00dy hard at it.

    @TG: sorry you’re experiencing similar sh1t. Giving space is sometimes the safest option + every winter turns to spring! The latter is more than just a reference to the seasons. I hope your wife does indeed pull herself up and make sense of what’a happening. IMO it’s interesting to see how people manage things differently, i.e. those who are into whatever form of self-help vs those who aren’t. I’ve done loads of the former over the years (coaching, NLP, Buddhism etc) and I reckon most people would see things more positively if they practiced at least the basics. Good luck.

    Edukator
    Member

    I’m still intrigued by what her plan B is OP. She is sitting in an exptremely comfortable place at present and would love to know what she thinks her life is going to be like without you. The only clue so far is that she’s close to her mum. Does she plan to move back in with mum?

    fizzicist
    Member

    mrmoofo has more or less nailed it in some respects – OP has taken a lot on and by the sounds of things not really put a foot out of line.

    you shouldn’t give yourself a hard time for being work focussed. If you have a partner who has health issues, a young child and you’re keeping the house ticking over as well, then work is often a release from that and something you can control and drive positively, all the time the results of this benefitting the people you love most.

    It’s a bit of a hunter gatherer type approach and if you’re anything like me, it’s one of the ways, if not the main way in which you show your love for your family – by providing for them. I’m crap at showing my emotions and generally feel uncomfortable talking about touchy feely bullshit how I really feel. However I adore my family and want them to want for nothing.

    Relate will be a good route for getting this across to you both as your partner will no doubt feel that she has sacrificed things for your career.

    Good luck – you sound like a good bloke.

    Premier Icon CHB
    Subscriber

    OP….sounds fixable. Good luck with it.
    Many relationships have rough periods and raw emotions. You need strength of character and faith in the real nature of each other to get through the wobbles.

    woodlander
    Member

    @Edukator: her parents are the other side of the country + her job/friends and everything else are all here. Like you say, I can’t imagine how she’d cope with everything, especially looking after the little chap, if she was to go it alone.

    @fizzicist: yep, hunter gatherer syndrome as much as anything I guess. I’m also carp at show my emotions at times. But I have allowed myself to get stressed (and secretly resentful) at times + become overly sensitive/angry at certain things.

    @CHB: you’re right, it is. We both need to believe that though.

    FTR, we’ve both been getting on well over the last few days. She has said she’s booked in for a one-to-one session with a clairvoyant/spiritualist later this week though! Can’t see myself ever doing that TBH.

    mrmoofo
    Member

    clairvoyant !!
    You relationship is now going to be down a soothsayer?

    FFS … was the witch doctor too busy?

Viewing 11 posts - 81 through 91 (of 91 total)

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