females drinking cocktails

Are you a Ferengi?

There was a restaurant in Edinburgh famous for this – work do – everyone kicked in and just over £50 short. The other manager and I were scratching our heads and digging into our wallets – then checked the bill again and sure enough they had charged 2 x £27.50 instead of 2 X £2.75. They just shrugged when we pointed it out and updated the bill. I got the impression this was routine stuff and a lot of people had the same story when I asked around. Its fraud really.

I was in Majorca not long after the introduction of the Euro and the hotel restaurant and bar had a similar scam going. British guests weren’t familiar with the Euro and the exchange rate so the hotel would be multiplying stuff by 10 and giving change for a 10 Euro note instead of a 20. A lot of people were still working off the old pesata maths so didn’t really pick up on it.

Worked well on the drunken golf groups.

Equal split unless someone hasn’t been drinking (unusual) in which case we knock a bit off. If people are too tight to go along with that simple thing then they aren’t the sort of people I would want to be friends with.

On the rare occasion there’s someone there genuinely down on his luck then I find folk quite happily, and quietly, chuck in a bit extra without any fuss.

Sometimes you win from splitting, sometimes you lose. Over a year it probably all evens out. Same as the round buying system, part of being social.

The Patio, downstairs Italian place on Hanover St. This was many years ago I don’t think it is there any more.

I always used to hate going there because of that woman. Other friendlier Italian places nearby.

Sometimes you win from splitting, sometimes you lose. Over a year it probably all evens out. Same as the round buying system, part of being social.

Precisely.

Agree with @scruff9252 on p1. Don’t understand why the thread went any further:

I have a fairly simple rule – any messing about at the end of the meal around who pays what & I’ll never eat out with them again. Life is too short for that sort of nonsense.

Split evenly by person. It all comes out in the wash amongst friends.

If it don’t work like that, they’re not friends.

Always makes me laugh on these sorts of threads that paying for what you owe is seen as stingy, whereas suggesting to split the bill is all generous. In my experience, most of the time it’s the person suggesting the bill splitting who is paying less than they owe!

I miss Junkyard on these threads.

Amongst strangers/acquaintances, probably fair enough to pay what you owe. Amongst good friends, split and offer a few quid extra towards a tip if you’ve had an extra course. Anyone driving others and not drinking alcohol gets his or her drinks bought. Anyone ordering the massive steak gets watched closely. 😀

Thing is, I’ve found that tight bastards either don’t realise they’re being how they’re being or they do and don’t give a shit who cares or notices.

The whole politics of splitting bills really annoys me as you always get one in any group who does it using different ‘rules’. If I’m with a new group or work colleagues I always pay my own way.

With my long-time friends we have devised a system that works well. As I’m teetotal and not really a foodie my share of the group bill is always tiny. I was perfectly happy splitting the bills for years as I counted the extra spend as good value for having their company and it went towards the tip but one evening one of my mates called out the others on how I always seemed to be paying double or more than I should. Without me intervening at all they had figured out that if I drove them to wherever we were going and they all paid for my food and drinks then it would be fairer all-round and easier for everyone. Sometimes the drive would be short, others long. Over the course of a few nights out it all balanced out. We’ve been using the system ever since, for the last 6 years or so. They’ve even stopped me contributing to the tip pot on occasions, when they do I just pop a tip over the bar as I go to the loo! I’m not a tightwad by any means, I’ll happily do a round trip to pick everyone up en route or even do double trips if there’s a big group of us. Always feels like I’m getting a free night out of it though!

When Mrs BigJohn was a teacher her evenings out with colleagues were full of these shenanigans. At one event she loudly suggested “everyone put their share in the middle and then we’ll split the shortfall equally”

Split evenly by person. It all comes out in the wash amongst friends.

If it don’t work like that, they’re not friends.

Why would it come out in the wash? And what is the wash?

I have friends who have big appetites and are a bit snobby about what they drink. When they go out regardless with whoever it is they would think nothing of buying the big steak and the £12 a glass wine. It’s not that they are rich, or taking the piss out of the payment system just they prioritise that sort of thing over shiny bits of carbon bike. Any fair enough if that is what makes a cloudy day slightly brighter for them. If the convention amongst a group of friends is always to split the bill evenly what sort of ‘washing’ is going to even that out over time. Yes, they could chip in extra every time to even it out but if you are going to break ‘the rule’ for that would it not be equally reasonable for the person who always spends less to arbitrarily and independently break the rule the other way too? Then it’s just an unholy social mess!

Individual ordering and billing as the default house rules would be the way to social nivana.

And don’t get me started on why we still prat around with tips in the UK.

^^^^
the ‘rule’ is to offer more than your share, like with rounds. I’ll have lost out slightly over the years I don’t doubt, but so what? What sort of person do you want to be? Generous or tight – you cant be both.

There are some who are proud of their tightness, and completely unembarrassed about this which I can frankly respect, certainly compared to those who think they’re covering it up. (Thinking of one of my surfing mates. Who’ll do a ostentatious tray of sambukas (£2 each) having dodged the £5 pints… ****, oh it all gets noticed 🙂

Worst I recall was a meal with two couples, one of whom we barely knew. We put in our share for the (average) meal plus (possibly over) generous tip. Found out later after we left that the ones we didn’t know paid the complete bill minus tip, effectively pocketing our cash… Nope.

There are some who are proud of their tightness, and completely unembarrassed about this which I can frankly respect, certainly compared to those who think they’re covering it up.

Yup, you can identify them easily as they get pissy about tipping.

Thing is – it’s my most moneyed “mates” that act like this. Running their social life like a corner shop. ****.

Just going to throw into the mix the person who actually agrees with splitting the bill but will give you his share next time he sees you….

I think there is an element of a gender divide.

My mates and I go out 4 of us, the bill is £54 and everyone throws in £20 to show how Geez they are. We spent the rest of the night buying rounds, except Mr. short arms, deep pockets who always managed to skip one…. you know who you are.

My Wife goes out with her Mates, 8 of them, the bill is £254 (because they all drink their own weight in Prosecco and Cocktails) a ‘quick’ 20 min conflab happens and they present the waiter with exactly £203 (only after the bill passes forensic accounting, an NHS discount is requested and usually received and various discount codes they’ve saved up are applied but they always pay the service charge or tip, a bit) later a bank transfer appears on our statement to send Jane (it’s always Jane) £3.28 “because I had the Garlic bread and didn’t have enough cash” they spend the rest of the evening in buddy groups buying another bottle each and there’s another transfer of £4.58 to Rachel (because she lives near us) for exactly half the Uber cost home. It seems very complex and ‘business like’ but it works for them and no one gets upset, which, given how often they get upset with each other, is surprising, what’s really amazing is they manage it with perfect precision seemingly barely able to walk unaided.

mates and I go out 4 of us, the bill is £54 and everyone throws in £20 to show how Geez they are. We spent the rest of the night buying rounds, except Mr. short arms, deep pockets who always managed to skip one…. you know who you are.

My Wife goes out with her Mates, 8 of them, the bill is £254 (because they all drink their own weight in Prosecco and Cocktails) a ‘quick’ 20 min conflab happens and they present the waiter with exactly £203 (only after the bill passes forensic accounting,

🙂 🙂 this too!

Worst I recall was a meal with two couples, one of whom we barely knew. We put in our share for the (average) meal plus (possibly over) generous tip. Found out later after we left that the ones we didn’t know paid the complete bill minus tip, effectively pocketing our cash… Nope.

Worst I’ve suffered, we were invited (friends and I, not couples) to the latest Posh Bistro in Swansea (an oxymoron I know). This place was a little pretentious (I know, in SWANSEA!) and they didn’t sell beer, they also made a huge fuss of doing little.

4 couples and about 5 ‘Lads’ at a long table, being the enterprising young scamps we were, between courses we hopped next door to the pub, purchased some bottled Lagers and kept them down by our feet like naughty schoolboys. We had a pretty good evening actually, a bunch of desperately mature ‘middle class’ Swansea Jack Couples laughing and joking which some slightly rough around the edges Cardiffians, our mistake was not having that slightly awkward discussion about ‘the bill’ before hand. The couples enjoyed 3 courses, including some really expensive shellfish dishes, a few bottles of wine, a meal fit for Royalty, some of us had a starter, most didn’t, none took a desert and not being much in the way of wine drinkers, had bought our drinks next door after getting he wink from the waiter.

It started with that weird theory that a couple, is, somehow so in tune that they’re now a single entity, erm what? oh and it’s fair because they ‘shared’ (shared in this case meant they had some of each others, not they shared a single dish) and they wanted to split 9 ways. Most of them were Teachers so their negotiation was largely based around being condescending. They finally accepted a 13-way split “if you want to be like that” by then I think we were so embarrassed we accepted and hoped they enjoyed their wine, it certainly cost enough to be lovely.

This notion that it “all evens out over time” is all well and good but it assumes that a) you all go out in a similar group regularly and b) you’re all on a level playing field.

I’m vegetarian, my meals typically cost a few quid less than the carnivorous options. That’s never going to change.
I’ve a mate who’s tee-total, he will just drink the free tap water rather than a few pints. That’s never going to change.
I have a friend who will always order steak, not for pretentious reasons but because he’s funny with food and it’s the only thing on the menu he knows he’ll like consistently. That’s never going to change.
Another friend will always order a bottle of wine to herself, sometimes two (taking the rest away with her). That’s… you get the idea.

How is that lot ever going to even out over time? Doubly so given that I eat out in a large group maybe once a year.

Why am I picturing an AD&D meeting after reading your post Cougar? 😂

I think a bit of common sense needs to apply. If you only have a main and no drinks and three others have 3 courses and 4 drinks each why should you split the bill evenly. That would mean that your mates are taking the piss rather than you being a tight ass. Seems that everyone has to pretend that they have endless money when they go out and be the big shot. If they are your mates they wont mind paying for what they had and not expect you to pay. But if everyone has a pretty similar meal and drinks then splitting is by fair the easiest way rather than counting pennies

Why am I picturing an AD&D meeting after reading your post Cougar? 😂

I’m a wizard my meals typically cost a few quid less than warrior options. That’s never going to change.
I’ve a mate who’s a paladin , he will just drink the free tap water rather than a few pints. That’s never going to change.
I have a friend who’s a half orc will always order steak, not for pretentious reasons but because he’s funny with food and it’s the only thing on the menu he knows he’ll like consistently. That’s never going to change.
Another friend that’s a dwarf will always order a bottle of wine to herself, sometimes two (taking the rest away with her). That’s… you get the idea.

Why am I picturing an AD&D meeting after reading your post Cougar? 😂

I’m going to need some assistance on the acronym here. Google is throwing up “accidental death and dismemberment” or “Advanced Dungeons & Dragons”

It depends…  With some friends we take turns in paying.  Others we just divide the bill by the number of people eating. Where I know that someone may not be feeling as flush due to the distance from payday or because they have less disposable income then itemising is fine – especially if it means someone doesn’t feel pressured to pay more than they can afford.

I shouldn’t have typed all of the above – I think this is generally covered by Rule No 1.