Should I move out of the parents' house?

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  • Should I move out of the parents' house?
  • Wow! There’s some absolute ignorant stuck up bell ends on this thread ain’t there!
    Society says you MUST have your own place aye?
    Well I moved out when I was 20, with the ex over over 10 year, two kids, we split up two year ago, csa taking nearly half my wage which isn’t much above minimum wage, work over 40 hours a week, certainly cant afford living at the moment and I reckon there’ll be thousands more in my situation, had to move back in with mummy two year ago, and im 35 today, see my kids nearly everyday, I hope the snobby micky takers don’t find themselves in my situation.

    fasthaggis
    Member

    OP

    Build an Granny Offspring Flat in your parents garden,sorted 🙂

    hora
    Member

    If you get on well with your parents I don’t see why you should rush to move out.

    Continue paying £50 a week IF you are on a low wage or are desperately saving for somewhere to live.

    Pay ALOT MORE TO THEM if you ride a fancy bike and drive a powerful hatchback.

    They shouldn’t be subsidising your lifestyle.

    I know someone who was in this situation and milked it. They’ll be paying for your council tax (yes they will) as well as your other associated costs that are more than you put in. Feel embarrased?

    If my roof over my head, food and bills all came to £200 a month I’d know there was someone paying out of their pocket. You are riding their goodwill.

    Pay them £100 a week. They may protest but be a man and insist. Don’t be a parasitical child.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parasite_single

    Shag’ just noticed your post above. If you are in straightened circumstances its different to what I posted here. You aren’t taking advantage of your mum. Theres a distinction.

    I know a few people in shaggmeisters situation, plus others living at home to save a deposit. A friend even managed to save enough to buy a house outright upon moving out, no mortgage at all.

    Sticking together as a family makes a lot of sense to me.

    Having said all that, my parents make me nuts, and seem to be turning into typical Daily Mail reading UKIP voting idiots.

    badnewz
    Member

    Very good point shaggmeister,

    They shouldn’t be subsidising your lifestyle.

    Doesn’t sound that different to the huge number of people i know in their 30’s who’ve had frankly HUGE sums of money from their folks to pay for weddings and house deposits.

    badnewz
    Member

    HUGE sums of money from their folks to pay for weddings

    The bigger the sum, the earlier the divorce!

    Premier Icon njee20
    Subscriber

    Very good point shaggmeister,

    Is it? His circumstances are clearly massively different to the OP.

    I’d just like to point out that I help mummy out as much as I can, I only pay her £60 a week although she refuses but I feel better knowing I’m giving something even if it’s all I can afford, and also the main thing is that she’s more than happy I’m there, we actually talk now and says I’m good company! Ha, before I moved out for the first time we didn’t see eye to eye… Anyway, it’s the main thing on my mind al the time, thinking I need my own place, but if I did I wouldn’t be able to afford to see my kids as much as I do. It’s shit out there at the moment. 😥

    badnewz
    Member

    His circumstances are clearly massively different to the OP.

    Yes, but he was making a more general point, criticizing how
    “Society says you MUST have your own place”.

    B.A.Nana
    Member

    Very good point shaggmeister,

    Not really, he’s citing completely different circumstances, he’s already gone out into the big bad world and faced all the perils. he’ll probably not stay longer with his parents than he absolutely has to. The OP is still cowering behind his mothers pinny..
    EDIT: already beaten too it.

    Tom B
    Member

    Your situation is vastly different to that of the op shagg….I don’t think anyone would think of you as a sponging manchild.

    thomthumb
    Member

    i moved home after uni (was supposed to be short term) but ended up being there until i was 28. If i hadn’t have done this there is no way i would have been able to buy a house.

    Rent prices in the SE are high – maybe more than mortgage payments. Most of my friends can’t comprehend A; how i saved for a house B; how i lived my rents for 5 years 😉

    funnily enough some good friends of mine have just moved home as they have a newborn and have realised that it will be impossible to save a deposit whilst paying the rents down here.

    don’t listen to people who are a lot older – it was completely different bitd. my parents doubled their money on their first flat in under a year; Never going to happen today.

    Premier Icon franksinatra
    Subscriber

    “Society says you MUST have your own place”

    I don’t think it does. There is an expectation that by the age of 30 you have made some effort to move on from being tied to your mums apron strings. In Shaggmeisters case he has done than. In the OP’s case he has not.

    badnewz
    Member

    In the OP’s case he has not.

    Speaking of whom, where is he anyway?

    My view summarized – if you are living at home to save to move out of home, then it’s fine. If you are living at home as a spounge, then that’s not fine.

    Junkyard
    Member

    They’ll be paying for your council tax (yes they will)

    no they wont there are three adults there so when he moves out the bill wont change.

    If my roof over my head, food and bills all came to £200 a month I’d know there was someone paying out of their pocket. You are riding their goodwill.

    Depends though if you moved in with me all the extra bills are basically your food and a bit more on utilities. I bet that is close to price neutral for the parents tbh*

    Pay them £100 a week. They may protest but be a man and insist. Don’t be a parasitical child.

    I hope you are jssut trolling

    OP it really just depends it is not something I would want to do [ unless you are saving] but nor do I feel the need to suggest you are a parasite
    *from your link [ ignoring the fact we dont live in Japan obviously]

    The additional expenses for the parents due to the additional household member are usually small, as the fixed costs such as rent must be paid regardless, and the additional cost for food and other consumables is sometimes negligible.

    hora
    Member

    Junkyard from experience of such a situation no it isn’t. Older parents don’t tend to eat as much/are careful with heating etc. To say ‘neutral’ is ridiculous if you add a third more to the mix.

    fr0sty125
    Member

    I’m 22 and I moved out 6 months ago when I really didn’t need to but I think it was great step forward in my life. No one really knows what will happen to the property market so you should probably stop guessing about it. Standing completely on my own two feet is something that I see as major step forward in my life.

    I can’t afford to buy a house so I rent but there are other options as well if you have any nice co-operative housing nearby that could be an option.

    Premier Icon unklehomered
    Subscriber

    Well I moved back after redundancy, and then stayed through terminal illness, would do the same again. It has set me back in terms of ‘life progress’ blurgh – but have a new job now and putting together plans for a controlled exit and possibly even house purchase in circa 12 months time. Its not the end of the world.

    OP, I’m looking at buyin with a mate, neither of us can tollerate the idea of renting (at all for him, he’s worked, and been to uni, and worked, and been to uni again to become a teacher while living with parents, and is a textbook example of how it can be done, with dignity), me because I have before and I’m 32 now, and want something for my money. One of my reasons for buying, I want my own pump track in the garden, all this growing up nonsense is balls! 😛

    Junkyard
    Member

    To say ‘neutral’ is ridiculous if you add a third more to the mix.

    Its not and even your link said it.
    There are limited additional costs as most of the costs – mortgage, council tax, having a washing machine, utilities, council tax etc are fixed [exist whether he lives there or not]and only really food and a little extra power for say a shower or tv in his room are incurred for which they receive £50 per week. Hence it will be cost neutral or thereabouts.
    I know it will be hard for you to understand despite it being in your link.

    Parasitic child was way OTT

    hora
    Member

    I love my kids to bits – one getting close to Uni now – but I’d want them to be out there exploring life and living on their own/with other people by 25. Otherwise I think they’d be stuck, missing out, pissing away their youth.

    Yes in Italy things are a bit different (Google Mammismo). But even there parents are having to buy their sprogs flats to get rid of them.

    Move out, Rent, live.

    Junkyard
    Member

    the one I quoted from in my first reply and referred to in my second post?

    Why not read what it says on costs – I know I quoted it up there for you but you seem to have missed it – and feedback to the class.

    Premier Icon kayak23
    Subscriber

    Stay where you are and what’s more, stop paying rent. You didn’t ask to be born and your parents need to accept their responsibilities.

    hora
    Member

    I was watching a programme on extensions last night and I thought it was great that one couple were having an extension built to house them so they can be next to their family (and the fact that they couldn’t afford a house).

    Brilliant- look after children/care, family etc but still have your own space too.

    Haha, the poor OP, he probably only wanted a bit of friendly advice. He got advice though, some of it is just missing the ‘friendly’ bit.

    Saying that, my advice does mimic a lot of the above. Depending on where you are in the country (I cant be bothered to look), a houseshare wont cost you more than £300-£400 max, bills included, and you’ll probably have an absolute blast, and can continue to decide on buying a place at the same time. Plus a lot of the time, there is no real commitment, so if you don’t like it, you can try another place.

    Go for it, YOLO, Carpe Diem, and all that jazz. Good luck with whatever you do 🙂

    hora
    Member

    One thing I will say OP- what if you meet a lady/want to bring her back etc?

    Especially if shes vocal/likes to voice her approval at whatever you are doing?

    I wouldn’t want my Mother laying there in bed and saying ‘he really is abit of a marathon runner/epic isn’t he Cyril? He certainly doesn’t get that side from you.

    Torminalis
    Member

    There are limited additional costs as most of the costs – mortgage, council tax, having a washing machine, utilities, council tax etc are fixed [exist whether he lives there or not]and only really food and a little extra power for say a shower or tv in his room are incurred for which they receive £50 per week. Hence it will be cost neutral or thereabouts.

    On the face of it this may be true but things are rarely that simple. What if the parents want to downsize but can’t because they still need the bedrooms, what if they want to sell the house and release some equity to help their other children who may have flown and now need help? What if they want to buy a camper van and take off whilst renting their house out to cover their living costs and retire?

    My daughters are less than a week old and I am already planning on how I can kick them out!

    hora
    Member

    My daughters are less than a week old and I am already planning on how I can kick them out!

    You’ll change 😉

    Mines only 3 and he can stay forever.

    Saying that in a few years time I’ll change my mind!

    Houseshare. There’s loads of places, inexpensive, a great way to meet people..maybe even a girlfriend!!! 😯

    Jeez…

    what if you meet a lady/want to bring her back etc?

    I imagine the minge is queuing round the corner for a 30 year old bloke who lives with his parents!

    Junkyard
    Member

    On the face of it this may be true but things are rarely that simple. What if the parents want to downsize but can’t because they still need the bedrooms, what if they want to sell the house and release some equity to help their other children who may have flown and now need help? What if they want to buy a camper van and take off whilst renting their house out to cover their living costs and retire?

    Lots of what ifs that dont change the maths for all we know they are still working.
    Its seems a bit of a leap to assume they would be living the dream but for the OP’s presence

    Mines only 3 and he can stay forever.

    What you want a parasitic child whose energetic love making you can listen to 😯

    your posts are like a stream of consciousness without the consciousness bit.

    johndoh
    Member

    Mines only 3 and he can stay forever.

    What you want a parasitic child whose energetic love making you can listen to

    From what I can gather of Hora, he’ll be out on the pull with his lad in a few years time, double-teaming mothers and daughters….

    Premier Icon Pook
    Subscriber

    Nope – he’ll be trying.

    hora
    Member

    I imagine the minge is queuing round the corner for a 30 year old bloke who lives with his parents!

    I just laughed out loud then.

    fasthaggis
    Member

    your posts are like a stream of consciousness without the consciousness bit

    and they always make it to the top 10 5 3 of the STW creepiest/disturbing posts list.

    maybe even a girlfriend!!!

    Or boyfriend. Let’s not be presumptuous. 😉

    Premier Icon scotroutes
    Subscriber

    cbmotorsport wrote:

    Houseshare. There’s loads of places, inexpensive, a great way to meet people..maybe even a girlfriend!!!

    +1
    These posts concentrating on the financial pros and cons are missing the point.

    hora
    Member

    top 3

    Hmmm must try harder

    Premier Icon ransos
    Subscriber

    I lived in house shares for about 5 years after I left uni, and it was a right laugh. And I met the woman who is now Mrs Ransos…

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