Yep, I know it’s daft… I’ve got a very short commute and I’d like to make it more horrible. Was going to stick some clapped out downhill tyres on it but they’re too big for the mudguards (and cause a bit of bother with the vbrake cross cable too).

So- looking for something heavy, draggy and generally grim to stick on skinny ancient XC rims, must be smaller in width and height than a 2.3 Specialized. Any suggestions? Decent wear rate would be good too, and ideally low price while we’re at it.

Tioga 26 x 2.1 DH wire at 950g?

not cheapest for a cheapy tyre at £18 each but should drag a bit 🙂

just cut the bead off an old worn tyre and double bag both tyres, do the same with tubes too if that’s not heavy enough.

fill the tubes with water?

you did ask for daft suggestions!

wet scream

fill the tubes with water?

you did ask for daft suggestions!

😆
it is creative !

Skinny spiked mud tyres should do it. Poorly adjusted brakes could have the same effect.

Can’t you just go for a longer ride rather than direct?

just lower the tyre pressure in whatever you’ve got. if its a road commute there shouldn’t be any hard edges to come up to so 20psi should do you fine in a 2.1 tyre

surely setting off in the opposite direction would sort you out!

when I rode a lot of street BMX, if a tube burst we’d just cut the valve off and put it inside the tyre, no idea if it helped anything but the wheels weighed a ton.

Failing that, why not just run a low pressure?

You could go with the Tiogas at about 24psi – and more than that they’re lethal on wet tarmac (keep you handling sharp mind you!)

Line your route with treacle the night before? You could just get a wicker basket on the front with a tin of bitumin paint with a hole in it to sticky up the road.

Stick twigs inbetween the stays and the rear wheel?

Mal-adjusting your brake blocks so they’re always a bit on?

Riding with a 3 second Chechua tent on your back is a good one – I can vouch for it, great in high cross winds too; you can even go backwards for a while in strong head winds.

You need one of the old dynamos I had as a kid. It was like riding a bike plus doing a turbo trainer session at the same time. Then when you stopped at a junction it went dark……

drop your saddle so you’re riding with your knees by your chin?

Fill your tyres full of custard.
I’ve never seen anyone win anything with tyres full of custard so they must be slow

when my old man learnt to ride in the 60s, his dad filled the tyres up with baling twine and made him ride round the field. Heavy + no Punctures + low pressure = reliable exercise

seosamh77 – Member
fill the tubes with water?

you did ask for daft suggestions!

Did this to a mate on April 1st. Old skool pump in a bucket of water and a long hose = childish hilarity

filled my brother’s tyres with water too, as per onion.

I also filled his frame with Sand 😯
I managed to do the bars, top, down and seat tube
😈 😈 😈

I was about 14/15 at the time and really didn’t get on with him much at the time. He wasn’t best pleased 😳

+

or alternatively

just say “Aye” tae the Pie 😉

@29ER KEITH

liking the sand idea. would be more fun with dog shi though

Would custard have the odd efect of making it harder to accelerate (or brake) depending on how rapidly you accelerated/braked?

Water would just make them heavy.

GW you monster, I’m allergic to pies!

I’ve got a longer route but tbh it’s not that much fun now with the earlier night, too easy to just get to the junction and turn right instead of left. But tyres of pain can’t be ignored so easily… Tried low pressure in my existing tyres and it just made the bike not really go round corners…

Some very good suggestions though. Some not so good ones too! Cheers for both

Would custard have the odd efect of making it harder to accelerate (or brake) depending on how rapidly you accelerated/braked?

Applied thixotropy – nice.

Would that give you regenerative braking?

Geektastic, tyres to rheology in 25 posts…

I was convinced this was a troll! wear a jacket that catches the wind

Don’t forget some slime tubes!

Spoke weights for motorbike wheels and use bluetac or something to fix it?? 😉

One of the chaps in my LBS was complaining that his wheels were too heavy on his 24″ jump bike,

When they took them off they found he was using the worlds heaviest inner tubes – some sort of cheap downhill tube which was put on the scales and came in at 1.3 lbs which is heavier than most tyres.

So you could get a really heavy tube and then also fill it with stans or something similar to make it even heavier?

What about water bottles filled with sand or cement. Crap tyres will just make your commute a chore, no better way to kill a bike. With the bottles you can take them out when you feel like it and do the longer run in or out.

I’ve got some 2.35 Super Tacky, dual-ply rear Minions available if you are interested. They’ve hardly been used.

E-mail: mikek@skylinecad.plus.com

Trailrakers? The knobs would last forever and create a serious amount of drag.

And take a bottle of lead in one of your cages.

Or buy a £60 full suss BSO from the market and use that? I’d check the brakes though 🙂

I’m with brassneck….trailrakers…last forever and drag worse than tying a pack of huskies to the seat post and point them in the opposite direction…

Four dynamos, two per wheel, wired up to a big fan mounted on a rear rack ( a bit like those fan boats you see in American swamps) but have the fan pointing the wrong way, blowing air forward.

The more you pedal the harder it gets

But (and here is the really clever bit) it would feel like a tail wind blowing on your back. Your mind is tuned to like (or indeed love) a tailwind…. It will completely fudge your mind up as well as your knees.

Not finished yet…. Your hair will be swept forwards at the back and swept backwards at the front. This could possibly cause (if you have good hair) a lateral left to right Mohican, not only adding comedy looks to head fudge knee killing experience, but also a larger, more visible, safer road profile.

I shall call it the “the fanny fudger”

Patent pending, already applied to dragons den.

1.9″ Panaracer Trailrakers. Expensive solution mind you.