After a day walking in a rainy, wintry Peak district we went for a curry back in Rusholme.Mate had his company car broken into. They left behind his mobile phone ,laptop and briefcase and made off with a carrier bag containing his soaking, sweaty walking socks and torn muddy overtrousers.

This one sounds too good to be true, so it probably is – student flat got burgled, everything of value nicked except ‘There is nothing left to lose’ CD by the Foos left in the middle of the floor.

Just been for a walk down the road and fond that Park tyre levers don’t make the grade either. Will go further down and see if they realised how bad the helmet was as well.

Stoneham? Stoneham? Where’s your bar? LA! LA! LA!
Stoneham? Stoneham? Where’s your bar? LA! LA! LA!

🙂

Someone stole our green wheelie bin from outside our house after it had been emptied on collection day. The council replaced it for free.

lol @ CFH 🙂 😆
Monte was the best bar. “Get Slayed!”

Craving for a Mega Jawbreaker from Nev’s Burger van now. Dunno Why.

Monte F block here, like A/B block only less than 20 people per shower 😀

Apparently, there’s a good export market for Bedford TK gearboxes,

A farmer I knew went out to start his Bedford TK cattle truck one morning, wouldn’t start so he thought the battery was flat. He had a look under the engine cover but it was covering nothing. The engine & gearbox had gone!

I had a shop on my petrol station which was broken into, all they took was a dustbin & ALL the confectionery. They even left the cigarettes.

Wife’s car was broken into & all they took was a cheapo ice scraper, & it wasn’t even winter.

Monte was the best bar.

FACT!

Anyone else suffer a Grendel there?

Came back from a ride one evening to find my dad’s Panda (didn’t have my own car then) with the door wide open. Thought the worst as I had my discman, a load of CD’s and my wallet with £50 in the passenger footwell.

No damage to the car as they’d levered the top of the window frame to get at the lock pin. All they took was the post-ride pack of Jelly Babies from the cubby in the dash. Was properly gutted – and hungry!!

Only went up to E when I was there (and E was half a block).
Thought old A had gone? Or was it B and A left? (off to check streetview… blimey… what have they done? reception and the A-B link has been stolen and the thieves left 2 new residential blocks behind)

Anyone else suffer a Grendel there?

2

on my 21st

jeez that one kinda hit instantly 20minutes later.

one guy did a yard, and the bar staff snatched the yard as the last drips went down, while we manhandled the guy to the open pavilion windows expecting a turquoise chunder, but he shook us off went to the bar and ordered a pint.

Some crackers in this thread and some reminders of stuff that’s happened to me or mates.

Had an exhaust back box nicked at college, had to drive home sounding like a tank.

My mate had his van broken into and they took his tube of Jaffa Cakes and nothing else.

I went on a day trip to Dorset, got back and someone had nicked the front indicator out of my companies Vivaro.

Someone tried stealing petrol out of my car, but all they acheived was pulling the filler neck through the 1/4 panel, 1980s Fords were rot boxes

On a different note, at my mates one night just watching TV and some kids posted a women’s magazine through his letterbox, when challenged they just said ” happy Xmas ” wasn’t even Xmas……

Shop next to mine used to be a newsagents – one night someone broke in through the roof. He missed all the alcohol, but took one carton of cigarettes, and left behind a very nice leather jacket.

With his bail papers from Hamilton Sheriff Court in the pocket, giving his name and address.

Left my car unlocked and had my tax disc stolen. It only had a month left but the idiot still put it in his car just down the road. Spotted it, called the police and they towed the car. Hopefully it was crushed.

Me and a mate were out for a midweek walk in the Goyt Valley. We got back to the car to find his drivers side door lock trashed and the car open. They didn’t appear to have taken anything, then as we set off home there was an anguished cry: “bastards!!!! They’ve nicked me Creme Eggs!!!”

The missus recently had a break in at her office.

Ignored her iMac and stole a bag of drumstick lollies.

Bastards.

My combination bike lock.

Huh?!?!

Shop next to mine used to be a newsagents – one night someone broke in through the roof

Hang on – niche expensive bike shop next to a newsagents – which one would you break into?

My brother once had his knackered old Ford Escort stolen.

It was ‘found’ 100 metres down the road with the dodgy gearstick (which had come off in the thief’s hands) on the back seat and with the engine still running.

Years back a mate borrowed his mum’s car and we drove to Glasgow to see a band (Slipknot I think). Car inevitably got broken into, thieves made off with 2 cans of diet coke and my mate’s 3rd year actuarial maths and statistics course notes (they actually emptied his rucksack out onto the seat and left it and everything else in it behind, other than the study notes).

Have to say that as fashion criticism goes, having someone move your jacket out of the way so they can steal some cans of fizz is pretty harsh.

Hang on – niche expensive bike shop next to a newsagents – which one would you break into?

You can’t smoke a Brompton.

thieves made off with … my mate’s 3rd year actuarial maths and statistics course notes

The thieves were surely trying to help your friend 😉

You can’t smoke a Brompton

You can however sell them on and buy lots of packets of cigarettes.

This just goes to show what burglars are thinking – half of them are too stupid or wasted to know what they are doing, and at least some of the other half probably are just doing it for kicks.

My parents got burgled many times in their old house – backed onto a field, on the other side was a rough council estate.
Usually they took easily sell-able electrical goods. Once though, they took a bottle of Liebfraumilch. And that was all…

Once when bikes were locked to rack on the car parked at Wetherby services, I had the star-shaped top cap from my Maverick SC32 forks nicked.

I had a resin cat taken from the front garden – it was life size and weighed about 20kg.

20 yrs ago my neighbour had his ford orion boot knicked. To do this they carefully removed rear screen (from the outside) and dropped back seat to slide under and unbolt boot lid – all in a suburban north london street at night under a street light, without disturbing a soul.

A frikking Orion, and after they had ceased production FFS.

Other neighbour found car hardly balanced on 2 bricks under the sill (one on top the other) and 2 alloys missing. Stupidly after putting 2 temporary steel rims on it she parked it the other way round and 3 days later….you get it. The even used the same 2 bricks which she had just left in her front garden!

Just remember 2 more.

My mates Dad had the rear spoiler nicked off his Astra.

A neighbour, not so much theft more vandalism, parked his Reliant Robin up on the outskirts of Wigan town centre whilst he went shopping, came back and someone had tipped it onto its boot.

Looked like a rocket taking off.

He had to get recovery to come and get it back on its wheels.

few weeks ago the shop was broken into, they tore up some paperwork, and stole several envelopes full of shelf edge price labels… oh and they had a rifle through the confidential waste. They left the safe alone…

You can however sell them on and buy lots of packets of cigarettes

Bromptons are bulky and identifiable. You would have to store them while you found buyers. Other scumbags won’t be interested in them.
Fags are lightweight, low bulk and really easy to sell. It is also really hard to prove they are stolen.

In chester a few cars had their fuel lines cut, and petrol drained into bottles,any spare petrol was just let run onto the road, luckily the milkman smelt petrol and phoned the fire brigade, before someone had an early morning fag.

Got accused of nicking a plate out of the cheapo microwave at a house we where working at, it was found a few days latter in the dish washer.

CaptainFlashheart – Member
Stoneham? Stoneham? Where’s your bar? LA! LA! LA!
Stoneham? Stoneham? Where’s your bar? LA! LA! LA!

it was downstairs – i worked in it for 3 years!

I once had a tent stolen whilst I was asleep in it.

It was before the days of sewn in groundsheets and yes, I was very, very drunk. 😀
They left my boots & socks, which was nice.

Sister and her husband had a beige Austin Montego years ago (I know, I know).

BiL come out one morning to go to work, starts car and thinks firstly “hmm, engine seems louder than usual”, and secondly, “I can see the engine!”

Someone had come onto their drive in the night and nicked the bonnet!

Mate of mine lost his darts a couple of weeks ago. He denies it but I figure it was a beer-related incident.

They were his pride and joy so he traced down and ordered an identical set, same shafts, flights and all.

Week later, his car was broken into. They left his stereo, CDs, sunglasses, everything, just made off with… his new darts.

When I lived in Manchester, someone broke into my old mini and pinched the knob off the top of the gearstick.

In the same street, I left my bike locked up outside the doctors surgery and came back to find that someone had tried to pinch the quick-release seat post and saddle (but evidently gave up, as I had locked the saddle to the frame) and just made off with the quick-release lever.

Fair things robbed in the past but looking back seem pretty funny.

Student flat was broken into – robbed my course notes which consisted of a few titles and a few very well drawn cocks…

Car broken into when walking in the peaks – flips flops, me kagool & some waterproof trousers gone – ignored 3k in camera equipment.

When i worked in a hospital one of our patients went in for some minor tests, while there he had a heart attack,crash team called, they grabed the old defribulator,at the time it was trolley based and needed a power supply, some low life had cut the plug off it.
It was then decided all plugs should be red and have HOSPITAL engraved on them.

Took a hire car back to the depot, chap comes out starts shining uv torch on tyres, engine bits etc, when asked why, he said people where hiring cars for a weekend and stripping the new bits, and replacing with older parts suitably cleaned up.

Lockup was broken into. Unable to start the bike, the fekkers got the petrol tank open and made off with the petrol.

Oh, one of mine.

I had a new bathroom suite fitted following the old bath splitting and turning my living room into a tropical rain forest. No great loss, the old suite was a 70s vintage in sun-bleached bronchitis yellow.

We got a skip, started hoying out the old suite. Threw the bog in the skip, and in the time it took us to get the bath out and downstairs someone had had it away with the throne.

Who the hell wants a forty year old, pus-coloured, second-hand crapper? People are weird.