OMG! You don’t know just what happened…

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  • OMG! You don’t know just what happened…
  • cynic-al
    Member

    Have we worked out who SC is yet?

    What dya mean worked out who SC yet? 😀

    Premier Icon BoardinBob
    Subscriber

    We mean you’re a tragic alias

    Explain tragic.

    mudshark
    Member

    On a slight tangent…there was a story years ago that the police used a picture of Nigel Benn for a wanted poster as there was a criminal who looked like him. Unfortunately, based on the poster, someone tried to tackle Nigel Benn and got punched for their trouble.

    tazzymtb
    Member

    As I sat in the living room my 5 year old shouted at me from the back door.

    ‘ I can’t hear you if you’re shouting from outside,’ I said.

    Again, he shouted back.

    ‘I told you, I can’t hear you from there. It’s rude to shout. If you want me to hear you, walk into the living room’ I replied.

    A few moments later my son appeared in the living room.

    ‘Dad, I’ve got dog shit all over my shoes.’

    tazzymtb
    Member

    Two men just finish a long round of golf, shake hands and begin walking off before one of the men says curiously, “I’m not meaning to sound rude, but what’s in that case you’ve been carrying all the way round?”

    The other guy replies, “Oh, I’m a hitman.”

    “Whoa, cool! What’s in the case then?”

    The hitman pauses for a second, and then takes out a very large gun, which he assembles in front of the man. Once finished, he hands it to the man, who begins to look through the scope.

    “Wow, I can see for miles. Oh and there’s my house! I can even see my bedroom. Oh, and there’s my wife in there… with… with another man!!!”

    He angrily turns to the hitman and says, “How much do you charge?”

    The hitman replies, “A thousand per shot.”

    So the guy thinks to himself for a second, and finally says, “Right, I’ll have two shots. One at that man’s dick, and one at my wife’s head.”

    So he hands the gun back to the hitman, who aims and steadies himself for the first shot.

    After about a minute, the angry guy says, “What’s taking so long?”

    The hitman replies, “I could save you a grand here…”

    Premier Icon scaredypants
    Subscriber

    LOLling* at tazzymtb

    *ish

    tazzymtb
    Member

    only clean jokes i know…sorry

    Lanesra

    I’m disappointed in RudeBoy, SaboteurCherie is one of his worst efforts

    That’s B.S. I have already met a couple of STW folk for a ride on Sat, but believe what you like.

    Inbred456
    Member

    Two roundabouts sitting in a pub having a drink. In comes a zebra crossing and starts to pester the roundabouts for a drink. They cave in and buy him a drink. A subway then comes in and the zebra crossing starts to pester him for a drink, finally giving in and buys him a pint.

    A foot wide strip of tarmac then comes in walks over to the bar. Whisky barmen and make it snappy. It gets its drink pays and leaves.

    The barmen remarks to the Zebra crossing that he didn’t pester him for a drink.

    The Zebra Crossing replies Don’t mess with him he’s a CYCLE PATH!

    juan
    Member

    Shamely enough inbred456’s joke made me laugh

    simonfbarnes
    Member

    Its a younger simonfbarnes?

    Do you mind ?
    1) I am not a girl
    2) I don’t do jokes

Viewing 15 posts - 41 through 55 (of 55 total)

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