New g/f and carpet in her toilet, along with white shag pile everywhere

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  • New g/f and carpet in her toilet, along with white shag pile everywhere
  • If your guidance system is unreliable you may have to sit.

    Edric 64
    Member

    Sounds like a girl who will love it if you go round immediately after a wet ride !

    At least your new GF likes a good shag

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    .pile carpet.

    Sometimes premature urination may make an appearance…

    What are you, 7 years old?

    Premier Icon Cougar
    Subscriber

    its shoes off on entry,and clean socks

    How very English.

    Premier Icon bearnecessities
    Subscriber

    So its shoes off on entry,and clean socks,then onto the white carpet

    I’ll say it. Phnarr!

    Edit: 3 seconds too late *ponders familiarity of phrase*

    fenred
    Member

    Yup deffo sit down and make sure your little tallywaker is pointing downwards too to avoid peeing thru the gap between the seat and the pan…Or is that just me πŸ˜•

    piemonster
    Member

    So its shoes off on entry,and clean socks,then onto the white carpet,but the toilet has white carpet also and no over spray mat.

    In all honesty, I’d make hay while the suns shining. But no longer. I couldn’t live with that.

    fenred,no it’s not just you. 😳

    enfht
    Member

    Toilet carpets were clearly invented by a woman.

    IanW
    Member

    Clean in the kitchen, dirty in the bedroom?

    piemonster
    Member

    Toilet carpets were clearly invented by a woman.

    Not so sure, the GF is almost certainly female. But she hates toilet carpets.

    I’m thinking they are the work of the sort that collects embroidered badges. Or those little enamel badges that get stuck to walking sticks. Usually male.

    piemonster
    Member

    Clean in the kitchen, dirty in the bedroom?

    Sloppy eater, dirty…… err

    fenred
    Member

    thejesmonddingo – Member
    fenred,no it’s not just you.

    I can’t believe I fessed up to that on a public forum, glad I’m not unique tho, been worrying about that for 40 years! πŸ˜†

    andyl
    Member

    I can’t believe I fessed up to that on a public forum, glad I’m not unique tho, been worrying about that for 40 years!

    [quote]

    Well I can’t say I’ve done that since I was about 3 and still had plenty of growing to do πŸ˜‰ (that should make you feel bad about it again :p )

    Premier Icon huckleberryfatt
    Subscriber

    Are there knitted toilet roll covers too? I’m trying to build a picture here … are you dating Hyacinth Bucket?

    I’m no expert, but I reckon she’s probably insane…

    andyl
    Member

    You could wear some really big slippers that would catch any drips.

    bland
    Member

    Has she got a well kept garden and do her curtains match her carpet?

    piemonster
    Member

    Projects girlfriend?


    image by piemonster, on Flickr

    yossarian
    Member

    Piss in the sink, it’s the only way to be safe.

    project
    Member

    Has she got a well kept garden and do her curtains match her carpet?

    She does have a selection of garden ornaments, which all stare at you when youre in the garden.Very off putting.

    hora
    Member

    Your girlfriend was 30 in the 70’s?

    fenred
    Member

    Cheers andyl, you must furnish me with your mobile number so I can call you when I’m at a low ebb/times of woe πŸ˜‰

    Premier Icon slowoldgit
    Subscriber

    Have a pee outside against the wall before ringing the doorbell. It’s the only way to avoid incidents.

    Mrs Toast
    Member

    She does have a selection of garden ornaments, which all stare at you when youre in the garden.Very off putting.

    RUN AWAY!

    Anybody who puts carpets in the toilet, bathroom or kitchen is clearly insane.

    And if it’s white carpet… GOOD GOD. And starey garden ornaments?

    FLY, YOU FOOL!

    khani
    Member

    I know a person not a million miles from this thread who’s GF (at the time) made him go to the pub across the road to have a number two…
    πŸ˜‰ you know who you are…

    Squidlord
    Member

    Have a pee outside against the wall before ringing the doorbell

    Is that a euphamism for something?

    hora
    Member

    What are you doing in the garden?

    Her doggy-style??

    allthepies
    Member

    carpet in the khazi == fail.

    Premier Icon slowoldgit
    Subscriber

    Is that a euphemism for something?

    You’ve no idea how many times I changed that comment in an attempt to avoid just that. Garden, grass, front door, in the street…

    Squidlord
    Member

    Stoppit, you’re turning me on! πŸ˜†

    Premier Icon nickc
    Subscriber

    New favourite gif.

    Poject leave a trail of muddy footprints to the loo, miss. Leave

    rossatease
    Member

    No peeing after sex for you then… (For the benefit of the vast number of 40 yr old virgins on here, it sometimes divides into two different directions)

    rogerthecat
    Member

    White carpets does suggest she’s not into dirty sports!

    andyl
    Member

    fenred – Member
    Cheers andyl, you must furnish me with your mobile number so I can call you when I’m at a low ebb/times of woe

    πŸ˜†

    That gif needs a different type of badger at the point he stops and runs away

    No peeing after sex for you then… (For the benefit of the vast number of 40 yr old virgins on here, it sometimes divides into two different directions)

    Love the scene in Me, Myself and Irene where he goes to the bathroom the next morning πŸ˜€

    project
    Member

    So its shoes off on entry,and clean socks,then onto the white carpet,but the toilet has white carpet also and no over spray mat.

    Sometimes premature urination may make an appearance , so how to cope /avoid.

    Thankfully i have vinyl at home.

    Premier Icon nedrapier
    Subscriber

    Project’s new toilet footwear.

    project
    Member

    Love the badger Mrs Toast.

Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 116 total)

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