Mindfulness – Always a good thing?

I know there are lots of different definitions of mindfulness so I will start with the first one in my search results which is from the Mayo clinic

Mindfulness is a type of meditation in which you focus on being intensely aware of what you’re sensing and feeling in the moment, without interpretation or judgment. Practicing mindfulness involves breathing methods, guided imagery, and other practices to relax the body and mind and help reduce stress.

In principle this approach is good and definitely helps reduce stress and panic. It helps you get a focus on what is actually happening to you rather than a gazillion thoughts whizzing in and out of your mind leading to brain overload, panic and stress. I used it for this and found it helped a lot.

The more you practice it the easier it becomes to calm yourself and remove the worries about things you can have no influence on and then focus on what you can influence. Over time you become almost immune to worrying about things that you can do nothing about.

This is a good thing and leads to a more peaceful existence

The trouble I have found is that the process doesn’t stop. Your mind continues to disregard worries over things that don’t really matter. You are watching a film and miss the ending, well so what? It didn’t really matter. You dent your brand new car, no-one hurt so it doesn’t really matter. This is a slow and creeping problem that you don’t really notice.

It is not too much of a problem when it is bad things that don’t bother you but your brain doesn’t work like that. Good things stop mattering too. Your football team wins, hey ho. You beat your best score/time/race position, so what?

Gradually you sink to a steady state with no real downs but also no real ups. A sort of beige adequacy of feeling.

Anyone else find this?

I think you’re overthinking this 😉

The carpet is soft, there is an air of tranquility and peace and I’m feeling pretty neutral about the whole thing to be honest.

More seriously I’m nowhere near good enough at it to reach the emotional equivalent of a magnolia painted new build.

It’s not good for everyone apparently.

*not being sarky by the way, that’s my understanding of what the research shows. It isn’t helpful to some groups of people. But often pitched as a panacea for all.

I flip flop between worrying far too much and stressing out to WGAS mode.  I’m finding it very hard to find a happy middle ground at the moment

Okay, probably doesn’t matter

Good things stop mattering too.

How is that mindfulness? Isn’t the whole point of mindfulness to be aware? So you should enjoy the good things even more.

EG a walk in the woods becomes an even more enjoyable experience as you focus more on smells, sounds, breath, dappled sunlight, etc.

If mindfulness is working this well for you, then you are really good at it – respect.  Buddhist monk kind of good!  Reaching transcendence, or whatever it is called.

But more seriously, if you tick the YES box in your GP mental health questionaire  ‘do you find that you don’t take pleasure in activities you previously enjoyed’, then you are probably a little depressed.

I’ve tried to snap out of not being in the moment but it sure as hell ain’t easy!

Example, earlier this week I knew our grass wanted cutting but it would be too wet until the afternoon. Went out for a ride in the morning kept thinking about the damn grass instead of focusing on the ride , would I be able to cut it before it rained again ! Grrrrr 😡

I have done mindfulness since I was a kid,teachers called it daydreaming.
Now I find it’s a beautiful thing being able to switch off all the rush and absorb the tiny details.
For me,long distance walking and bike rides always take it to a different level .
Having that time to think about all manner of things,without the day to day interruptions,is most excellent.
😊

Isn’t the whole point of mindfulness to be aware? So you should enjoy the good things even more. No, you should be distracted by the unimportant even less. This means when you start with a mind cluttered with unimportant things you get the improvements I showed in the first chart ‘good mindfulness’. Keep going and you hit an equilibrium of not big positives or negatives.

a walk in the woods becomes an even more enjoyable experience as you focus more on smells, sounds, breath, dappled sunlight, etc. When you remove the unnecessary clutter from your mind and first notice it. After a while you are just walking in the woods.

Same as fasthaggis. Just did that Myer-Briggs stuff again and it proves it. Did a much more detailed version a few years ago (Process Communication Model) and it said the same thing. I don’t tend to worry about things… but I don’t often focus very well either. Hence the fact I’m here now, my tea is cold and I’m not doing the work i’m supposed to be doing.

It doesn’t work at all for me, puts me into a really ugly spiral, same as meditation stuff. Which is fine, I just don’t do it, but it’s become a bit of a panacea for mental health stuff so that’s frustrating. “I tried it and it was terrible for me” always seems to lead to “ah but there’s this new website…” “oh but there’s this new resource”.

My understanding …

Meditation – you focus by concentrating on a point (light etc) and let it flow. i.e. empty the mind and just observe whatever but not to think.  Remember to breathe otherwise you will be in trouble if you go into deep concentration, and you may not come back.  I can only do 5 mins of meditation before I start to think.

Mindfulness – may or may not have to combine with meditation.  My understanding of mindfulness is be aware of your own actions through your 5 senses.  You can decide what is good or bad for you.

Go ride a bike instead.

Early am navel-gazing from me here… but ultimately most of this stuff doesn’t matter. Some would say that individually and outside our own ego we are insignificant. Perhaps that is the point. Car dent. Job. It just doesn’t matter .. and when (if) we’re free of all that we can move on towards acceptance and happiness. Maybe it’s a different happiness to the one society tells us we’re working towards. Something about neutrality on daily existence to become free of the fear of death, only your health and character matter..

Apart from the health point it does seem a bit extreme to me. I read a bit about and around this a while back and decided I like having concerns or a real stoke for some of the small things in life, or spending time on an interest that isn’t some kind of gravel-raking zen activity (riding a bike has some of those qualities though). The usual way of life means we have needs and that creates unhappiness but hopefully we can balance that stuff out. Modest needs are ok.
As I get older I am more balanced in my thinking and with that has come a bit less of the spark for some things, less ‘flame of adventure’ is one obvious one that I miss, but maybe that’s also the result of itches scratched now and overall I am happier for having less need to do or own things related to all that, or finding it easier to satisfy that itch.
There’s a contentment to be had that is the opposite of the ‘grabbing hands’ rat racing mentality that can never give people enough.
So on balance yes, the flattened line might have some losses but it can be positive overall?

Jameso – I kind of agree. I should clarify that I haven’t flat lined yet but definitely no longer get the buzz from doing stuff that I used to. I guess it is just getting old and wearing out the adrenaline glands. I used to love riding dangerous stuff but now have a gravel bike to potter around the New Forest. This is not for a ‘keep myself safe’ reason, just that the buzz from taking the risk only happens if you care about the consequence. It is nice not to get the plunging depths but I do miss the buzz moments a bit.

I’m not sure its a good thing to judge mindfulness as being a good thing or not. You should simply note that you’re trying to judge mindfulness and move on… 🙂

I think some of it is age. I couldn’t carry on doing what I did on a bike years ago into my 50s and 60s and it’d be frustrating to have the desire but not the ability. Like I might have limited time left on that stupid rigid SS MTB that I’ve loved riding for so long and I wanted to be the oldest SSer in town.. Change is the only constant etc.

It’s all ok if you used the past well and don’t have regrets of having not done things when we could (well.. we all do I expect but hopefully nothing major that we can’t resolve). Who’d want to be the same person all their life? There’s no development there. It’s that point about some people’s work experience, that they say they have 20 years experience in a field but just it’s the same year repeated 20 times.

Mindfulness can be incredibly useful but it’s a bit passive and sometimes difficult to maintain. A good number of people speak on here about being on anti-depressants and for a many a good dose of (Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s concept of) ‘flow’ is required to distract them from their woes. It’s no surprise that these people and others are attracted to mountainbiking, surfing, rock climbing, all things that can completely engage the senses and take you out of yourself and into the moment.  Such experiences can also give you memories that take you back into that space. I once had a perfect long glassy surf over verdant rocks and sea life at Happy Valley (near Reeksy’s?) and just the thought of that can put me in the right zone.

I’m not sure its a good thing to judge mindfulness as being a good thing or not. You should simply note that you’re trying to judge mindfulness and move on…

Exactly. The notion that you can chart the results of mindfulness is false because the ultimate result of mindfulness is ego death or liberation – there is no ‘you’ left to chart.

Mindfulness is good for everybody but bad for every ego. The ego can kick up one hell of a fuss once it knows it’s in danger, hence some ‘people’ can experience some alarming reactions to mindfulness or meditation.