marriage councillors …. anyone used one ?

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  • marriage councillors …. anyone used one ?
  • stumpy_m4

    Has anyone used a marriage councillor to get there marriage back together ??
    i did the worst thing possible at the end of last year and that was have an affair
    ive been with my wife for 26 years since school and this is the only time ive strayed and im not proud of it
    i was so full of guilt that i confessed it all and moved out of the family home and found somewhere to rent ?
    we are on talking terms now and maybe seeking help is the best course of action.
    has anyone used one of these and were the results positive?


    i had relationship counselling for several months. we were not married but had a child.
    the result was that we split up.

    Premier Icon cinnamon_girl

    Worth trying as long as both of you are committed to wanting to fix it. It won’t be easy for sure, more so for your wife.


    Yep, me and ExMrsNettles went to Relate for a while when it was clear that things were not going well. We did eventually split, but I think the time with Relate allowed that split to be amicable as we both understood why it had happened.

    It’s only something that you can do if you both want to do it, but it can’t make things worse, so why not?


    wont make things worse but you may not get the result you want either.

    Were seeing a counsellor now. Our problem is communication which led to a magnitude of problems. After 4 sessions things are looking positive. It’s a long road to recovery but this was a last ditch effort and for the moment seems to be paying off.


    Yes, used Relate. It worked for us, thankfully .

    Yes – a great help. No affairs or other people but we were fighting badly

    If both of you want to save the marriage it could help you to find a way. But it requires both of you to want it to happen


    Yes and always a positive outcome. But as others have said, the outcome may not be the one you expected or wanted.

    It is also hard, no way an easy ride and the councillor will not fix things for you, only you can do that.

    It can be exhausting, I have left sessions completely shattered on more than one occasion. There may also be many sessions

    You need to commit and be 100% honest, especially with yourself.

    good luck

    Premier Icon MoreCashThanDash

    As others have said, will help the process go smoother whichever way it goes.

    Friend of ours is a (divorced) Relate counsellor.


    Loads of honest stuff above
    I’ll never forget just about the first thing the Relate counsellor said to me and Mrs Mm V1.0 which were

    you may not get the result you want


    it requires both of you to want it to happen

    In our experience, I wanted to be there, wanted to make it work. Mrs MM 1.0 did not. – No big issues on either side – mostly just a just a communication thing

    Still, eventual split was amicable…

    It depends on why you strayed elsewhere….

    Based on limited life experience I would suggest it tends to be because something isn’t quite right at home. If a communication issue underlies this, then it’s definitely worth your while trying. As others have said, it might be a make or break type scenario, but it must be better than being in limbo.

    Premier Icon Mark_K

    Tried it but didn’t work cos they didn’t take my (ex)missus side therefore she didn’t agree with it !!!!!
    Oh and not cheep !

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