Happy thread time, there’s enough doom mongering to go around.

So. we get our bent bananas back.

We also get lumpy strawberries and pears.

Greengrocers get to quote in lbs and ounces again.

What other fruit or even non-fruit related good news can we look forward to?

I want to know about conkers. Please tell me that conkers will be allowed now. And British Bulldog. And jumpers for goalposts, cream teas on the village green, with strawberries picked by hard-working British families…

I’ve got 17,410,742 turnips, going cheap due to tanking exchange rates.

Not looking forward to pounds, shilling and pence coming back, the poor thickfarts falling out of school are really going to struggle with that one.
The Green Cross Code man’s return is hotly anticipated as is cholera and typhoid.
#Progress

The scots love a neep – pretty sure we can trade with them still.

National Service anyone?

National service would be a good thing. Don’t understand why this was ever stopped.

Penny Farthing with suspension forks in production. 😆

The scots love a neep – pretty sure we can trade with them still.

Called them, they said no ta. Some La Pen women from over the channel is interested though.

I want to know about conkers

http://www.hse.gov.uk/myth/september.htm

😀

I was in Tenerrife the othe year and they were pointing out the devastation to their banana industry that decision had caused, so not really a joke, particularly when their small bananas can’t be less curved anyway.

the poor thickfarts falling out of school are really going to struggle with that one.

Good job Gove has made the exams harder then…

I for one vow to eat my fill of Tenerifian bananas! Be they long and proud or short and kinked.

Who’s with me?

Do we never have to endure the Eurovision Song Contest again? 😀

Excellent news for manufacturers of fast patrol boats and beach mounted machine gun turrets.

Women will have to shave their armpits again!

White dog poo for everyone!

Of course! oh how i’ve missed white dog poo.
Man this thread is starting to prove the sceptics wrong.
Probably.

slimjim78
National Service anyone?

But as we won’t be able to afford any military kit, you’ll have to parade around in just your undercrackers, carrying a small stick, and trying to look “threatening”….. 😆

http://www.hse.gov.uk/myth/september.htm

So ‘experts’ are telling me it’s a myth, then? I think we’ve had just about enough of ‘experts’ telling us what’s true and what isn’t.

Finally be rid of that foreign muck they call ‘food’ in weird supermarkets with foreign-sounding names. A return to KwikSave? Proper frozen cottage pies done properly. Hummous, olives and strange crisps begone!

Maybe we’ll see a triumphant return to proper English shopping experiences of old ie Burtons, Kays, K-Tel, Woolies and Dixons?

A return to KwikSave? Proper frozen cottage pies done properly.

With the amount of horse in them they might as well be called gîte pie!

Apparently we’ve had bent bananas (and cucumbers) since 2008, when the EU dropped the rule.
I can’t say I noticed the changeover!

Oh how we’ll laugh at those EU members with their feeble kettles that take an extra minute to boil.

The stinking exchange rate will hopefully push us all back to:

Good old traditional holidays at the English sea side with donkey rides, piers and mildly racist evening cabaret washed down with warm flat ale.

No more foreign bidets and back to a shared bath once a week to wash the coal dust off!

Oh how we’ll laugh at those EU members with their feeble kettles that take an extra minute to boil.

Thanks for reminding me, but we can now cut the cost of kettles as they can now come sans plug. I’ll feel much more confident now that I have control of how my electrical appliances are wired into the plugs. I’ll save a heap of money by wiring two or even three appliances into the same plug.

We’ll still do Eurovision?

Toilets wish a momentary flush capacity of Niagra.

Log be gone!

Vacuum cleaners will regain the suck they lost a few years back.

We can go back to smoking in pubs! Yeah! Worth it just for that.

Although not being a smoker I’m not sure why this is a bonus, but good ‘ol Nigel tells me it is, so I shall just cheer anyway. Hurrah!

We can go back to smoking in pubs! Yeah! Worth it just for that.

Oooh – I can sit outside without having all the smokers with me 🙂

But as we won’t be able to afford any military kit, you’ll have to parade around in just your undercrackers, carrying a small stick, and trying to look “threatening”….

Brown shirts surely 😉

We can go back to smoking in pubs! Yeah! Worth it just for that.

Although not being a smoker I’m not sure why this is a bonus, but good ‘ol Nigel tells me it is, so I shall just cheer anyway. Hurrah!

Fast track planning permission for pubs with a flat roof that allow smoking.