Kids getting told off for stuff that I don't think is wrong
Common sense for many schools is not to allow tree climbing.
I love climbing trees, so do my kids.
I work at an outdoor ed centre where we encourage it, when there are adults present to observe/supervise.
Looking at my kids school, which has it’s own woods, I don’t see how the dinner ladies who supervise play times could cover the woods and playing field areas, thus the woods are out of bounds outside class sessions.
It seems reasonable and I expect my kids to follow those rules.
I would be peeved if they were bollocked for breaking rules at another school if they hadn’t been informed about them…it seems the secondary schools needs to supervise visiting primary school kids better.
But chill, your kids still get to do cool stuff, and you help less fotunate kids do cool things too…what happened here was fairly minor really.Posted 4 years ago
What do I want?
Some common sense, and less people being settled with out of court on these things.
I want our society to be better at dealing with risk, like so many in Europe are.
POSTED 37 MINUTES AGO #
All commendable, but what do you want in this particular case?Posted 4 years agoCountZeroMember
All commendable, but what do you want in this particular case?
How about an admission that the rules hadn’t been clearly explained to visitors, and that they had been a little over enthusiastic about admonishing the kids for infringing rules they didn’t know existed, and apologising for same?Posted 4 years ago
One of the biggest things we all have to learn when we grow up and move into the GROWN UP WORLD is what to understand what is acceptable in other peoples environments.
When I work form home I can just wear pants, when I got the office I have to wear more suitable clothes.
Once you work that out then you can interact with the rest of the world a lot easier. Sometimes people have rules (rules man what they all about I just wanna be free and like) for reasons that we can’t immediately see, doesn’t make them wrong or stupid just different.Posted 4 years agoaracerSubscriber
I’ve told my son to come down from a tree on the school grounds before the start of school in that grey time where you’re allowed to leave your kids in the supervision of a teacher in the playground, but where I assume if I’m still there they’re my responsibility. Oh, and also somebody else’s kid. Not because I thought it a problem, but because I didn’t think it was something the school would be keen on.
Mind you if I did have a situation like the OP, I wouldn’t be writing to the chair of governors, I’d have a little chat with him when our kids were out playing together in our street 😉Posted 4 years agofizzicistMember
Biggest issue here for me is that the rules evidently were not set out clearly. Some interesting stuff about risk free environments being more dangerous.
Behavioural safety studies are genuinely fascinating. Factor in the nature of children to seek thrills and creating a flat safe environment, which to a child’s mind is essentially sterile and they will find new and creative ways to hurt themselves or damage the environment they are in.
Give them a controlled environment with assessed hazards and they will leap off walls etc to their hearts content. Odds on, they will be too busy messing about to climb a tree. I think a lot of this stems from the fact that when you are in a situation where you expect hazards, you behave accordingly and the risk of the accident reduces. I.e. I feel safer on my mtb than my road bike. On the mtb, I expect to have to take evasive action and ride with margin for error. On a road bike a small pothole in an unexpected place can wreak havoc and ultimately prove fatal. Likelihood vs severity innit.
We have this debate continually at home with my wife telling my son that xyz is dangerous. Interestingly on the days he has been arsing around trying to jump over pot holes on his scooter or pull skids on his bike, he tends to behave a lot better and not run around with his toothbrush in his mouth (apparently the most hazardous thing EVER!).Posted 4 years agoirelanstMember
I want our society to be better at dealing with risk, like so many in Europe are.
My daughter goes to a school in Europe (Belgium), and I have to say there are far fewer rules than back in the UK, the school has a forest and the kids climb trees and have stick fights during break times, just like I used to as a child and she loves it (except the getting hit with sticks bit).
That said she did break her arm 3 times last year, twice at school in playground incidents (not involving tree climbing though).
I wouldn’t say that they are better at dealing with risk, it’s just that people take more responsibility for their own actions. For example, they are digging up the cycle path I use on my commute to put some pipes in, there are no barriers around the hole, it’s a really big hole you can see it from 100s of yards away, if you fall into it then it’s your own fault. I can’t see that working in the UK or US.Posted 4 years agotheotherjonvSubscriber
Use it as a learning experience that has nothing to do with schools or trees. Sometimes, life is unfair. Accept it, some days you’ll get a bollocking for something you did that you didn’t think was wrong, for doing something you didn’t do, or for some imaginary misdemeanour you weren’t even aware of. If you get frothed up every time something like that happens you’ll spend your whole life being eaten inside by the absolute injustice of it all, and you won’t change anything except have a worse life yourself, because ultimately, at times life is distinctly unfair.
Tell your son this, that the school is obviously wrong, but its their school and their rules so accept it and move on. He’ll learn more of use from that than he’d get from the satisfaction that his Dad wrote a cross letter to his teacher.Posted 4 years agorogerthecatMember
Trees are highly dangerous. My eldest fell out of one near Ladybower Res and had to be helicoptered to hospital. Can you believe that there were no warning signs on the path warning people! They even built dry stone walls under the tree to make it even more dangerous- bloody irresponsible if you ask me. We sent a letter to them demanding they deforest the entire area and cover it in bark chipping so it could never happen to another child.
Kids need to understand risk and consequence. Rubber surface on playgrounds teaches them that it doesn’t hurt when they fall off, good learning experience to take into life!!!Posted 4 years agovinnyehSubscriber
Are you sure that the kids aren’t allowed to climb trees- it wasn’t that your lad was a visitor?
my kids climb trees, with me, their parent, they also ride bikes, climb mountains, etc etc
Schools don’t have the manpower to effectively supervise tree climbing etc
This to me is the main point.
While matt’s kids have the skills and experience to deal with tree climbing, I’d guess that there’s a fair few kids at the school that don’t.
Can be other issues as well- kids pushing other kids out of trees not the least of them.
According to son he was told at the secondary to come down, nothing made of it and no telling off, and that they all complied immediately.
First he knew there was an issue was teacher from primary hauling him back into classroom on arrival back and having a good go.
Bollocking is fair enough, you’re always given the ‘you’re a representative of the school etc etc’ lecture before you go anywhere else to visit. Sounds like the secondary we’re pretty relaxed about things.Posted 4 years ago
piemonster – Member
In what way?
In a ‘kids not allowed to climb trees’ way
Kids are allowed to climb tree, just not in some schools, I find in much worse that people can’t accept that what is allowed in one place is not allowed in others. It’s great Matt’s kids can get out and do stuff at home. It’s also good that the teachers can get on with teaching and not seeing how many kids they have to get out of trees at the end of lunch time 🙂Posted 4 years ago
Climbing trees at school was a highlight of the day.
It was the “Old Oak” in particular. The views where amazing, although this was Norfolk. Stand on a chair and you can see half the county.
I can see ‘why’ it’s an issue. I can even accept it. Doesn’t mean I have to like it.Posted 4 years agoflatfishMember
I sort of agree with the OP about the school being a bit draconian, on the other hand I can see where they’re coming from.
8 weeks ago my MiL fell from 5 feet whilst gardening and smacked her head on the floor.
Shortly afterwards we were told she would only have 2 hours to live if they didn’t operate.
2 weeks in ICU later she woke up.
She is now a fruit loop!!
The school are just covering their backs which is entirely understandable.Posted 4 years agoaracerSubscriber
What I really love about this thread is the irony of all the classic over-reactions…
In a ‘kids not allowed to climb trees’ way
Because of course kids aren’t allowed to climb trees at all are they? At my son’s school they get to do lots of outdoor stuff, including forest school where they go to the next door playing fields to “play” in the woods there. They also have lots of tyres set in the ground on the grass where the kids go and jump over, and little bit of woods on the school grounds where the kids can play in their break. I have absolutely no idea what the policy is on kids climbing the trees, but can accept it if they’re not allowed to on the school grounds during school time. After school down the park lots of kids climbing trees (and up high on the climbing play equipment installed there). Personally I find it very refreshing that none of the other parents seem overly protective of their kids. Oh and I also know the head on a first name basis, and it’s clear he’s not going to stop kids being kids except where there are real concerns for safety. I guess that’s what you get living in a village in the countryside.Posted 4 years agoGrahamSSubscriber
Thought I’d throw this into the mix:
50 Things ToDo Before You’re 11 and three-quarters (National Trust)
Item 1: CLIMB A TREE 😀
It also has a link to the HSE MythBusters site which says:
“Skipping, playing conkers and football and climbing trees are all important activities which help children to have fun and learn about handling risk at the same time. There is no health and safety legislation which bans these activities in fact HSE is on record as encouraging schools to allow these activities to go ahead. If individual schools choose to ban these activities it is for other reasons not health and safety.”littlemisspandaMember
Unfortunately, if you’re going to send your kids to school, you have to accept that the school might have rules that are different to at home. Seems the primary school overreacted to the incident, that was a bit unnecessary, but it’s unrealistic of any parent to think that their kid will a) never break the rules at school b) never be told off or c) that they will never be told off at school for something that you don’t agree with.Posted 4 years agoTurnerGuyMember
What would you expect to gain from writing to the head or chair of governors? What do you want from them?
he shouldn’t have been told off in that matter – he hasn’t let anyone down – just explain why the rules are there and that he can’t break them at school.
Who saw the documentary on Danny Macaskill whose mother actively encouraged risk taking – with shots of him and brother with some huge net in the garden strung between trees.Posted 4 years ago
Who saw the documentary on Danny Macaskill whose mother actively encouraged risk taking – with shots of him and brother with some huge net in the garden strung between trees.
Who saw the other documentary about the thousands of other kids whose mothers told them exactly the same thing, some of who became famous and other ate pies and died of heart disease at 42?
No? Probably wasn’t one. But ao long one perosn has become successful as a result, i’m sure it is an excellent policy.Posted 4 years agoGrahamSSubscriber
Who saw the other documentary about the thousands of other kids whose mothers told them exactly the same thing
Wait! Thousands of other kids had giant nets strung between trees in their back garden?
I knew it.
Pesky deprived childhood.
I could have been so great.Posted 4 years ago
The topic ‘Kids getting told off for stuff that I don't think is wrong’ is closed to new replies.