Christmas was invented by the illuminati to distract us all from their lizard based intentions.

You do know they’re watching you now Jamie. Another outburst like this and they’ll take you away to see their Lizard overlords….

Am I the only person who has never seen a JL Xmas ad?

No.

Christmas isn’t pagan; the Victorians invented Christmas along with Scottishness and quite a lot of other mawkish sentimental carp.

like **** morris dancing and global warming.

I love that.

I love Penguins too!

They taste like Chicken AND Fish!

They taste like Chicken AND Fish!

Mine always taste of chocolate.

It’s a bit shocking the way it’s all been hijacked, though – not many people know that Christmas was really a Pagan festival, not the day when John Lewis was born.

It’s a bit shocking the way it’s all been hijacked, though – not many people know that Christmas was really a Pagan festival, not the day when John Lewis was born.

It’s a Pagan festival? Surprised no-one has mentioned that already.

Frankly, I think anyone over the age of 12 who’s ever had a cynical thought and internet access knows “Christmas is a pagan festival”.

Which in fact, it isn’t, it’s a hybrid and frankly the ‘Pagan’ bit is the Lib Dems to the Tory Crass Consumerism and Labour Nativity Story elements.

P-Jay – hmm – I’ve eaten penguin. The last thing I would expect is someone to *like* it…

@allthegear

Sorry, I’m rarely taken seriously in real life, so I’m not used to people taking my seriously online – I was joking, I’ve never tasted Penguin.

I did eat crocodile once, and that is lovely.

Sorry, I’m rarely taken seriously in real life, so I’m not used to people taking my seriously online – I was joking, I’ve never tasted Penguin.

Heh…busted!

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCnXf9RfxfU[/video]

I’m not used to people taking my seriously online – I was joking, I’ve never tasted Penguin.

Ah, the Emperor defence.

I liked it, sorry… I’m a soft git with Kids, it does things to you…

Last years with the Bear was a bit below par TBH…

I reckon it’ll have a similar effect to the 2011 JL ad which had my missus in proper floods:

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSLOnR1s74o[/video]

I want – but can’t be bothered – to draw a Venn diagram of people who shop at John Lewis, and people who watch ITV. I’m not sure who sits in the middle – UKIP voters probably.

So Christmas is actually crapulous.

John Lewis advert ‘condones penguin sex trafficking’

You can tell from his expression that Monty is evil. God knows what that beady-eyed waddling pervert has in store for her.

😀

The 2010 advert, featuring the song “She’s Always a Woman” got me at a very sensitive time and properly destroyed me to fits of tears. I still can’t watch it without crying…

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYOsWWKHZVw[/video]

I did eat crocodile once, and that is lovely.

I find it a little snappy if bought in a fast food restaurant.

Do they taste like chicken?

John Lewis Christmas Penguin Advert (The Parodies)

Dunno why all the hate for the bear, I liked it. The penguin is a bet meh, but reminded me what a catchy tune “Real Love” is.

MrSmith – Member

Nicely shot, produced, graded, composited, flame work etc
Hackneyed sentimental dirge.
Customers and client will love it.

Not to mention the stwistas trying to “out-sensitive” each other.
It’s artless commercial string pulling – buy a bloody vacuum cleaner and clean that dust up

Dunno why all the hate for the bear

It always looked on the verge of eating the bunny and her furry friends to me.

Still on the first page and it’s boiled down to religion already.

I know, I mean WTF has Christmas got to do with religion. Sorry for dragging it off topic 🙄

(PS – I’m not Pagan either)

The “she’s always a woman” one is good but I was half expecting it to suddenly turn miserable, like the start of Up.

I wanted to hate that and cant you ****!!!

I like the babadook parody. Not perfect but well observed, the kid is kind of creepy

John Lewis Christmas Advert PARODY 2014

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LOhz3KkjTKc&feature=youtu.be[/video]

Loving all the “Pagans didn’t invent Christmas” comments (well one or two anyway), as if a bunch of Christians happened across a bunch of pagans celebrating something called Christmas and thought “Hang on..”
Of course pagans didn’t “invent” Christmas. They did however have a mid winter festival to coincide with the winter solstice and verily the early Christians didst think “Hang on” and didst cynically appropriate it for their own ends and rebranded it Christmas. As indeed they did with Oestre fertility festival. Any guesses for what they rebranded it as…?
Haven’t seen the JL ad, but I’m sure the missus will love it 🙂

Floods of tears because of an advert?………

balls, grow, of, set, a – springs to mind.

If the advert does that to anyone then god forbid they interact with the real world.

Just seen it. Shameless rip off of the truly great Calvin&Hobbes. And the song is a dirge. Not a patch on the bear and the rabbit imho.
Bah humbug!

Did this advert really make anyone feel like crying??! Boy with imagination + rampant commercialism.
Really.
🙄

Not seen the John-Lewis one yet, but the very.co.uk one was just on the telly. They’ve only gone and shrunk down Fern Cotton to the size of Kylie Minogue and have her running round a Christmas tree looking at various gifts – where the hell is this going to end…
RM.

VERY disappointed! Have I been out of the country too long? What happened to the ‘3 minutes of lingerie’ John Lewis ads?

and +10000000 for the Calvin and Hobbes rip off…

They should just have shown three minutes of Penguins falling over, would probably outclass about 90% of Christmas telly

VERY disappointed! Have I been out of the country too long? What happened to the ‘3 minutes of lingerie’ John Lewis ads?

That’s M&S, isn’t it?

Anyhow, these ads are aimed at real people who can identify with emotions portrayed on screen, not the bunch of sociopaths who inhabit this place. 🙂

doesn’t quite have the same emotional resonance for me, tbh.

Anyhow, these ads are aimed at real people who can identify with emotions portrayed on screen, not the bunch of sociopaths who inhabit this place.

Will those be the fake emotions stirred up by an advertising company to make people buy overpriced tat for a celebration of something most people don’t believe in?

fake emotions

How can I tell when my emotions are real?

Are they trying to get you to buy something? Then they’re fake. Unless it’s a bike of course.

They must have underestimated just how gullible the British public are.
Out of stock in every overpriced size, yes, even the £95 ones.
They need to get the whips out on the five year old kids in their Chinese sweat shops.