In your experience, is the word 'consultant' just shorthand for…

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  • In your experience, is the word 'consultant' just shorthand for…
  • Premier Icon mikewsmith
    Subscriber

    I tend to find its just added to the end of 100’s of job titles to make them seem more important.

    We do specialist stuff for a variety of companies and charge accordingly.

    Mike Smith
    Senior Consultant

    Premier Icon footflaps
    Subscriber

    Yep, they’re all just bullshit merchants.

    LoCo
    Member

    Advisors are usually more use than consultants in my experience 😉

    aP
    Member

    I do consulting work, but I’d like to think that I’m not a utterly clueless ****-wit. I may be wrong of course.

    lemonysam
    Member

    I ended up in a conversation with a Social Media Consultant on a night out once. I have absolutely no idea what he did for a living.

    Premier Icon BoomBip
    Subscriber

    Had a couple as business analysts who were really good, apart from starting the answer to any question with ‘So,…’

    Otherwise, can’t think of a strikingly good one. Usually come in with the luxury of being unencumbered by history, politics or existing workload which means a lot of ‘immersion’ activity (talking to lots of people about what they do) followed by some random blue-sky malarkey.

    My favourite bit is when they stay a little bit too long and end up going native 😆

    IHN
    Member

    you’re confusing it with ‘graphic designer’

    Alcopop
    Member

    Yep totally agree IME just come up with “solutions” to problems that don’t/never will exist
    talk a lot off faff and get in your way ….love a buzzword don’t they
    Cu*tsultants the lot of em

    bikebouy
    Member

    Some are good.

    I’d say it’s the temporary nature they are brought into fix and the longevity of thier contract/service levels TBF.

    It’s often a short term strategic fix they are engaged in, once done they’re out. Can’t complain about that when the Workstream Holders/Project Teams/Programme managers/Senoir Stakeholders all agree on strategy/legacy handling.

    Premier Icon honeybadgerx
    Subscriber

    I think it depends whether you work for an actual consultancy or your job title (perhaps just the one you made up yourself because it looks good on linkedin) has ‘consultant’ at the end of it.

    Premier Icon binners
    Subscriber

    IHN – we know they’re all idiots. But you just need to throw them some felt tips to keep them where they can’t do any damage 😀

    working with medical consultants, I’d have to say

    utterly clueless and unbelievably arrogant ****-wit?

    Premier Icon slowoldgit
    Subscriber

    Does the old definition, ‘A guy from out of town with a briefcase’, still apply?

    maxtorque
    Member

    I’m a consultant.

    I’m fracking epic i’ll have you know. Worth every penny……….

    Premier Icon unknown
    Subscriber

    I tend to find that people who can’t see the value in consultants are usually part of the problem…

    aP
    Member

    Pigeon consultants?

    Fly in, shit on everything, fly out….

    Premier Icon BoomBip
    Subscriber

    Does the old definition, ‘A guy from out of town with a briefcase’, still apply?

    Not heard that one, sounds ever so slightly sinister

    vickypea
    Member

    The rise in the number of people calling themselves consultants reminds me of what happened to the term “technician”. Now there are “nail technicians” for example, the original sense of the term is devalued.

    Premier Icon mikewsmith
    Subscriber

    unknown – Member
    I tend to find that people who can’t see the value in consultants are usually part of the problem…

    Never!! A bunch of bitter underlings with no real idea whats going on just running round getting upset that people are looking a bit too closely at what they are up to?

    Premier Icon honeybadgerx
    Subscriber

    vickypea – Member
    The rise in the number of people calling themselves consultants reminds me of what happened to the term “technician”. Now there are “nail technicians” for example, the original sense of the term is devalued.

    Don’t get me started on the use of ‘Engineer’…..

    Premier Icon footflaps
    Subscriber

    I tend to find that people who can’t see the value in consultants are usually part of the problem…

    Yep, we had a CEO like that. He pretty much bankrupted the company….

    jonba
    Member

    It is not a protected term so anybody can use it. There will be some good ones and some bad ones. In my experience they fall into three catagories.

    Professionals who have left an industry and set themselves up as expert advisers. I’ve met some very good ones. They are usually worthwile as companies contract them in to help in areas where they have no experience.

    Somebody wanting to sound more important and so puts it in their job title. Often useless if they don’t have the skill, knowledge and experience to back it up.

    Those employed by consultancy firms – Accenture, Mckinsey, and large companies with consultancy arms like the big 4 and IT companies. Can be ok although they take on graduates straight out of university and charge them out at ludicrous rates normally.

    See also, drirector, engineer, nutritionist etc. for other non proteceted terms.

    DrJ
    Member

    IME they are the same people you laid off in the last “re-organisation” to meet the headcount targets dreamed up by senior management, and then had to re-hire at higher salaries t in order to just get the job done.

    Premier Icon maccruiskeen
    Subscriber

    Their days are numbered

    (starts about 1min in)

    [video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSJggp-mbiA[/video]

    Premier Icon MoreCashThanDash
    Subscriber

    Consultant – someone who borrows your watch to tell you the time.

    Most of the ones I worked with in the private sector in the 90s were pretty sound. Just always wondered why we paid someone else to ask our staff how to make the processes and business work better…..

    Premier Icon slowoldgit
    Subscriber

    @ vickypea – I knew my work was devalued when I first saw the tern ‘accounts technician’.

    Can you walk quickly and purposefully?
    Can you pout and look as though you’re pondering something?
    Can you polish your shoes?
    Do you have a haircut?
    Do you like lunch?
    Can you raise an invoice?

    If you can answer yes to all the above then you too can make it in consultancy.

    bluebird
    Member

    As a friend of mine once put it: consultants, they borrow your watch and then tell you the time.

    To be fair, it’s a tricky job to do properly. After all, if you know you need a consultant you probably know there are things you could be doing better. That said they should leave all the jargon at the door on their way in.

    hora
    Member

    Consultants usually have to prove that their involvement has improved processes or bottom-line, %age etc.

    The old ‘I’ve worked here for years- said that, no one listened to me then a consultant comes in and says the samething and its listened to’.

    Maybe- but then you were hardly pro-active, ambitious and forthwright were you? Without the Consultant the above wouldn’t have happened so sometimes they are needed to negate…. the politics of every business.

    Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    Working alongside medical consultants I have to say.

    No far from it. Well not A&E ones anyway especially after one put another none A&E consultant in their place for essentially telling me I was wrong in my treatment of a patient. They not only supported me but told the other one in know uncertain terms why I was right and why they should listen to me. 😀

    toby1
    Member

    maccruiskeen – Member

    Their days are numbered

    A quick edit – or did you employ a consultant to help you fix it?

    🙂

    rocketman
    Member

    The BIL is a consultant. I wouldn’t consult him on the time of day but he is very good at convincing the hard-of-thinking that he knows what he’s talking about.

    KINGTUT
    Member

    Consultant – someone who borrows your watch to tell you the time.

    Brilliant!

    KINGTUT
    Recruitment Consultant.

    Premier Icon spawnofyorkshire
    Subscriber

    Environmental Consultants are a mixed bag.
    50% know what they are doing and provide a reasoned response to queries placed in front of them
    The other half will just write their report to support the desires of the client and are morally repugnant

    Consultant is so last century, its Architect now darlings.

    unknown – Member

    I tend to find that people who can’t see the value in consultants are usually part of the problem.

    Premier Icon binners
    Subscriber

    utterly clueless ****-wit?

    I just wondered if it was universal in all industries? I’ve found that If you can actually do something quite well, you’ll tend to just get on with it.

    If not, then you’ll shove the word ‘consultant’ after your name, and then get paid daft amounts of money by equally clueless idiots to generally be a complete PITA, and get in the way of the people actually doing the work. Coming up with increasingly ludicrous ideas simply to validate their own inflated invoices?

    Has anyone ever encountered one they didn’t think was a ****-wit? Consultants – do feel free to chip in and defend/justify your existences 😉

    ericemel
    Member

    I use a consultant at work on a regular basis – I pay him £1k a day and he comes in works his arse off and make a significant difference to be business.

    Worth every penny but not all are the same

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    In IT, a consultant is just someone you hire from another company. Sometimes they are actually consulting on some specialist issue, sometimes they are just bodies for hire. They can be world experts in some topic or they can be just grads.

    Obvioulsy the customers know the level of experience they are buying (and are charged accordingly) but they don’t know the level of competence and intelligence. Consultants can be good or bad at any level of experience, just like any other worker.

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