Im getting married..how much is this gonna cost?

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  • Im getting married..how much is this gonna cost?
  • freeagent
    Member

    Not sure what our cost – but it was less than 10k.

    Invites were hand made by us.
    Reception for 130 people in a village hall (cost about £250 to hire)
    Meal was a BBQ – think I spent about £500 on Steak/Chicken/Sausages in Costco
    We paid for all the drink – the beer all came from ASDA (3 crates for £20 deal)
    the wine came from the local Threshers – buy 2 get one free + sale or return.
    DJ was about £400
    Suits were from M&S – £100 each
    Etc….

    You don’t have to spend a fortune – provided you are a bit creative and don’t mind doing a bit of work yourselves.

    mrmoofo
    Member

    Scary sums here a lot of £7k to £10k. Making me scared of when/if my daughter gets married. Might have to go into hiding…..

    Your issue will be that your daughter will expect far more than that … Weddings are no longer about the celibration of two live coming together but a short union of two people so that they have a personal Prom. The world has gone mad. The average wedding now costs around 15k. The average marriage lasts 7.

    irc
    Member

    Less is more. The least enjoyable weddings I have attended were the church and hotel reception types. Too formal. Much more expensive.

    Mine was church then reception in parents house and (admittedly large) garden. No marquee. Food was a mixture of home cooked and buffet by caterer. Booze was large carry out. No band. Entertainment was conversation. The table tennis was out in the garden at one point though. Wife made her own wedding dress.

    My brother hired a local council owned hall. A friend’s brother who was a minister did the marriage at the hall. Hired a band. Drove load of wine and beer home from Luxembourg where he was working. Buffet dinner. Bride did flowers for the venue after going to the flower market. The wedding car was a black hackney from the venue to fairly local hotel before going away the next day.

    There is nothing wrong with big hotel wedding if that is what the couple want and the couple or their family can afford it. Going into serious debt for a wedding is madness though.

    iolo
    Member

    It will cost half of everything you own and loss of your house.
    You’ll get to see the kids once a month.
    The divorce lawyers these days are taking the mickey with their fees too.

    jim25
    Member

    Mine cost just over 11k
    75 people there for day and evening, married in a converted barn in Essex. Bbq style meal (actually cost more than a conventional sit down meal)
    Dress was about 1k
    Suit hire for me and 2 others from moss bros was about 400 I think.
    Photographer was 1k
    We made some of the table decoration stuff.
    It doesn’t have to cost a fortune and to be honest we could of done it less than that. I think the 3 main things to have right are the venue, food and photographer.

    trail_rat
    Member

    ive just booked for 2015.

    5k has got the venue – country house overlooking the water and food for 80 folk + 50 night guests

    band was 1k

    Hoping for it to be under 10k all told – as thats what id saved for it.

    as long as its a good time for all and not much more ill survive but ill not be borrowing to pay for it – some of the weddings ive been to have been at the expense of parents remortgaging houses and shit. – id rather just go to a registrars and sign the paperwork for peanuts than have a flash wedding if we were not able to.

    for me its about bringing our families together for a party tbh – we live all over the world and only time we all get together at once is for weddings or funerals.

    grum
    Member

    Probably knocking on 5 grand all in – wedding and reception for around 120 at a beautiful village hall, amazing buffet, bands, DJ, photographer – most of whom were mates. Me and the best men all just wore nice suits. We had an amazing day and lot of people said it was one of the best weddings they’ve been to as it was informal and relaxed.

    I’ve photographed quite a few weddings and the nicest ones by far have been the ones that are a bit unusual and quite relaxed, and where friends/family have got involved in making/doing stuff. Feeling like you ‘have’ to do/buy all sorts of stuff is a recipe for a stressful yet dull wedding, IMO.

    Do what you want not what’s expected of you.

    LHS
    Member

    We worked it out it would cost between £15k and £20k for the wedding we wanted and number of people in the UK. Went to the Alps and did it for £12k, including renting a chalet for a week.

    grum
    Member

    With foreign weddings though you are ‘saving’ money by passing on the cost onto your guests. Seems a bit cheeky to me and excludes/puts pressure on people with less money.

    Unless you only know rich people I suppose.

    wiggles
    Member

    This is a scary thread 😯
    Luckily my OH knows she won’t be getting more than a registry office and a two for one at the pub 😉

    wl
    Member

    I’d go £1,000 wedding and £9,000 honeymoon. Anything else is nuts.

    Premier Icon Clover
    Subscriber

    My business partner got married and we did it – church, meal for 50 people and party – for under £3k – basically by roping everyone in to help out. Luckily Nicola could make all the dresses, we have lots of practical friends and I have a nice barn so the costs were mainly materials and food. One of my favourite bits was a friend who brewed 120 bottles of elderflower wine as his wedding gift.

    I wrote it up here.

    [/url]
    Weddingbarn by BeateKubitz, on Flickr[/img]

    +1

    However, if £10K is what you can afford it’s what you should spend and alter the day rather than put yourself in unreasonable debt. If going the traditional wedding route you are going to have to develop some serious heels to dig in to keep the two of you within budget. The big thing to remember is (and is easy to forget) is what you are panning is getting married rather than a wedding. A wedding last just the day whilst a marriage will hopefully last a little longer.

    If your budget is 10k, maybe plan for 9k. If possible you can use 1k on the honeymoon but more likely that will cover the costs you don’t think about upfront.

    My wedding cost around 8k. I can go into details if you want. Here are some pics to show just what we did. If I was to get married again I don’t think I would change it. Other than perhaps pick a day when my wife wasn’t ill! We also had coaches take us to a nightclub that we had booked out for an afterparty but no photos from that.

    Tom Sparey Photography-554

    Edit – A lot of this was possible through friends rather than paying full price. The sound systems for the reception and the afterparty were both owned by friends so were free, we sorted out a deal for the club, the photographer was a friends brother so was practically free (£400 for over 12 hours!), my wifes dress was made by friends so was cheaper, our friends TAPT did the design, printing, made the ties & waistcoats and made the amendments to the suits – They also lent us the back drops, bunting and invites made by us, bands were all sourced through friends so were cheap, about 12 friends all deejayed for free, Half price prosecco and a pound corkage per bottle meant we could have bubbly on the boat rather than fork out loads on crap champagne at the reception venue. Chutney and biscuits made by some friends. The list goes on.

    Don’t mention wedding, PUSH for deals. Think about it sensibly rather than getting carried away or checking other prices.

    LHS
    Member

    With foreign weddings though you are ‘saving’ money by passing on the cost onto your guests. Seems a bit cheeky to me and excludes/puts pressure on people with less money.

    People will choose to come or not, sometimes a good way to keep numbers down. Plus I only know rich people. 🙂

    Sidney
    Member

    You could easily do it for <10k. Depends where you want to spend the money.

    We (well in laws) admittedly spent more than that in June but we had 110 guests.

    Some ideas:
    [*]Our two biggest costs by a mile were venue and food. We have been to weddings where instead of a sit down meal a hog roast was provided which was perfectly good. That could save dosh. Venue wise, if you’re willing to be flexible on dates then could try booking a cancellation slot.
    [/*]
    [*]Booze – if you go to a venue try to find somewhere with a corkage allowance and buy your own. Aldi champagne – £13, Prosecco £7 for reception and speeches. Our table wine was actually more expensive than the sparkly as we got from a vineyard in france we have visited. We also didn’t offer a free bar.[/*]
    [*]Flowers – see if you can get a wholesalers to buy direct from – should be better price than florists. We did ours for about £400 and arranged them ourselves the day before. Took a few hours with bridesmaids helping[/*]
    [*]Dress – i’m no expert but my wife’s dress was fantastic. She found it for £25 in a charity shop (shame she also bought £700 dress but decided at last minute she preferred her £25 back-up!)[/*]

    Hope it helps!

    dukeduvet
    Member

    We took a similar approach as grum and £5k all in for us. Again personal, relaxed bit quirky with a retro theme and everyone said how special it was.

    Church wedding and we used the church hall for evening do. My wife’s aunt did the catering for about 75 (she does this for hunts on an estate) and everyone loved the food. Cakes made by my mum and wife’s friends. Booze was shipped over from France. Dress was from a vintage shop cost after cleaning £100 (photographer was raving about it all day). Suits all hired. Photographers were about £500 and they were top quality. Decorated venues with friends. Had a ceilidh in the evening. Honeymoon was about £700 for a cottage in Yorkshire. Was great to be able to pay for it without getting into debt too.

    Don’t get caught up in spending loads. Make it personal decide what things you would really like and don’t worry about the rest. Make sure your guests get some good food and more important is having a good time together with your family and friends. If you can get them involved them it does really help make people feel part of your day.

    bland
    Member

    We got married in the Saddleworth Hotel, the main selling point being that they specialized in weddings and you had sole use of the venue. It was perfect in every way and the owner is fastidious over the smallest detail.

    We paid £1000 Hire
    Then i think about £86 per day guest (however that included a 5 course 3 AA rosette restaurant meal, a rolls royce silver phantom drop top wedding car, DJ, flowers, reception drinks etc)
    and then £14 per evening guest. We had about 35 day and 35 extra for the evening which worked well as you got chance to actually socialise with those you invited as oppose to some weddings which are so huge you get to see the B&G for maybe 30 seconds.

    That was about £5K all in, plus £750 for hand made dress, £150 suit hire for gents and we made the invites and had a friend as photographer who was about £600 for the day including electronic copies of hundreds and hundreds of pictures.

    Just over £2K on the honeymoon (saved over £1500 by booking the cheapest room then bunged the woman on the front desk $100 dollars to upgrade us which she willingly did)

    I would have happily had a BBQ in the garden but its all about the wife at the end of the day and its her day to feel special.

    Most importantly save and pay for it so you can start married life debt free, plus pay off debts other than mortgage if you have one first. If you havent got it dont spend it as the stress at the start of married life wont be worth it

    Premier Icon Pik n Mix
    Subscriber

    I got married in September, our initial budget was 10k but all in it cost ~14k. We could have probably saved in places, the day was however, magical. We were lucky to have the whole day in one venue and my uncle providing the photography as a gift.

    It can be done cheaply, there will be arguments in the planning stages.
    Try not to mention to suppliers that it’s for a wedding and it works out cheaper 😉

    footflaps
    Member

    We were a bit screwed with the pretending it’s not a wedding game. August BH, outdoor Barn – no one would believe it was anything else…

    ell_tell
    Member

    We’re getting married next Nov and have been quoted £7k for venue hire, food and drinks (90 people day & night). We’re hoping to come in under £10k so need to do invites, rings, dress, photographer and band/dj for less than £3k so we’re looking to save where we can.

    It depends on your venue but you can save a huge chunk depending on the time of year you get married. I think Oct – Mar (ex Xmas) are generally cheaper.

    trail_rat
    Member

    If i could guarantee snow and sun id happily get married in winter.

    Odds on for driech weet and grey.

    We’re getting married next Nov and have been quoted £7k for venue hire, food and drinks (90 people day & night). We’re hoping to come in under £10k so need to do invites, rings, dress, photographer and band/dj for less than £3k so we’re looking to save where we can.

    It depends on your venue but you can save a huge chunk depending on the time of year you get married. I think Oct – Mar (ex Xmas) are generally cheaper.

    Obviously everyone has their own tastes so this might not suit, but I think you should be fine.

    Photographer – haggle. Or I’m sure you know someone handy with a camera.
    Invites – make yourself. Probably still £200 on materials though.
    Rings – My wifes was >£30 from Amazon, mine was made for me by a friend so it was free.
    Hers was a corset made by a dressmaker – £150 (£40 on materials), and simple skirt made by her mum
    Band/DJ again free. Surely you know a few people who could do this. It would probably be cheaper to buy some soundlab PA speakers and amp from Maplins than hire a PA. Also some disco lights!

    Admittedly I am pretty lucky with knowing people who can provide me with things, but all it takes is a bit of forum trawling and I’m sure you can find some people to help for half the price of people advertising.

    Premier Icon MoreCashThanDash
    Subscriber

    Got married at a hotel that did deals on the rooms. 37 close friends and family, sit down spread for 37 people, no evening do or music.

    Mother in law/godmother did the flowers, god father provided the brides transport (was head honcho of the 2CV owners club 😳 ), my mum made the cake, wifes uncle iced it, one bridesmaid, cost less than the £4.5k honeymoon

    Edit: the subsequent cost, both financial and emotional has been beyond calculation mind….

    wrightyson
    Member

    We apparently paid £500 for chair covers we’d never own 😯

    Premier Icon breadcrumb
    Subscriber

    We got married this year, think it was between 5 & 6k.

    Church wedding, 40 guests
    Evening do was an extra 30 guests.

    My mate used his MkI RS2000 Escort as the wedding car. I know a photographer, so got a decent discount there. My OH has a friend with a cake business so that was taken care of.

    We used Loweswater village hall for the evening do, beautiful setting, cheap as chips too. The local sports committee supplied the bar, all profits go to local causes and drink was cheap too.

    We had a 3.00pm wedding, shorter day = less £££. Rather than a wedding breakfast we just had the evening meal, used the local butcher and had a hog roast.

    Most expensive cost was the band we hired but they were top notch.

    One bridesmaid kept costs down too.

    woffle
    Member

    Don’t get caught up in spending loads. Make it personal decide what things you would really like and don’t worry about the rest. Make sure your guests get some good food and more important is having a good time together with your family and friends. If you can get them involved them it does really help make people feel part of your day.

    This.

    One of the best things we did – hire a marquee and stick in my parents garden (with not a great deal of room to spare) – then did a booze run to France which meant that no-one had to dig into their pocket throughout the evening. Block booked a number of the closest bed and breakfasts (a number of which were run by family friends) so that people travelling could walk and didn’t have to worry about designated drivers or taxis…

    trail_rat
    Member

    Wrightyson Think the co-ordinator got the jist when he said – chair covers to make the chairs look nice for the day guests would be 6 quid a chair + fitting – when i turned round quick and said 480quid plus fitting for a chair covers – that folks hang their jackets over in the first 10 minutes , i dont think we will need that.

    He then tended to glass over frivilous extras after that,

    Photographer – £100. Only thing I wish we’d spent more on as photos ended up being poor. Should have gone with someone else who was recommended who was £300.

    🙄

    Some people just never learn… I’ve photographed hundreds of weddings and absolutely agree that money is not the defining factor in a successful wedding. The happiest weddings I’ve attended are, as Grum mentioned, usually a bit quirky or different. It’s the people that make it or break it though – of you invite 50 old relatives with no sense of fun or energy, your wedding will be crap. I wish I’d invited more mates and fewer rarely seen relatives (not that my wedding was crap, it wasn’t!).

    rwamartin
    Member

    Ours cost £92, paid to the registrar in cash in a brown envelope (“sorry, cash only, no cheques or cards”). Also cost another couple of quid for the train ticket to work afterwards.

    We couldn’t stop laughing at the gushing registrar going on about our happy event “come on luv, hurry it up, I’ve a train to catch and the kids are bored”.

    Best buy under a hundred quid I’ve ever had. (though I think she paid).

    Do it for a grand and put the rest into the mortgage.

    soops
    Member

    Mine cost about £1000.
    We picked everybody up and dropped them off about 30 during the day, paid for all the food, wine and beer during the day. Had fireworks. Then hired a room for the evening do and put on finger food/nibbles. A wedding night in a local hotel, then off to the old dungeon ghyll for a few nights.
    Been 14 years now

    crankboy
    Member

    Our’s was about 2k if you include me buying a posh suit and shoes that I then wore daily for the next two years. Registry office close family only meal in local bistro . Evening party in church hall with dj pa and buffet . Wifes “wedding” dress was a nice party dress from Harvey Nick’s sale for 100 quid . The only flowers were her bouquet and my button hole picked from our garden. We decorated the hall with candles in jars and balloons ourselves in the afternoon. Photos were done by mates with decent cameras. We had a personal very happy day no debt and 5 years on I am sure my memories of our day are as special as anyone else’s .

    It ain’t about the ring the dress or the party it’s all about the girl.

    What Crankboy said. Pretty much the same here. I think ours was £1800. Got my suit from M&S, wife got a ‘party’ dress from Debenhams, £100 ish. Registry office, 34 guests at a nice country pub, everyone had a disposable camera while my son did some ‘artistic’ shots, my sister made 5 MASSIVE chocolate cakes & everyone had a fab day.

    No need to go mad IMO, you’ll only be lining someone else’s pocket.

    we had a hotel do, max 20 guests – immediate family only, really

    I paid for the hire of the hotel for the day, registrar, civil ceremony, daytime reception, my suit, wine, photographer, honeymoon. came to less than £5k. Was a pretty fancy hotel mind. http://www.langleycastle.com

    Mrs_d’s parents paid for the flowers, her dress hire & our stay in the hotel for 2 nights – no idea how much that cost

    when the wine ran out (fixed budget) my sister bought a load more – thanks sis.

    no evening do – not necessary for < 20 people, we just said “there’s the bar”

    trevron73
    Member

    Venue for food dance ect could cost in excess of £15,000, i am a professional 2 rosette chef of 23 yeaars who has cooked for Royalty (regal and Elton)£4000 of that would be exclusive use ,i did my wedding in a michelin star restaurant all in including photographer for £900 .i did call in favors, however we could get the price down, think mid week or Monday,think out of season ? beach in late early year ?many possibilitys especially on the food PM for menus and prices ?? check out my current soon to be last Hotel “The Gallivant hotel Camber ” we are beach but i can work anywhere ?.com

    That used to be “the place”. Was quite good.

    I’m conditioned by my job to suggest splashing out on a decent photographer but I’m honestly gobsmacked at what many of you have budgeted for photographs of one of the most important days of your life. Disposable cameras? Friends? Relatives? £100?!! I do realise that many people don’t give a tinker’s toss about photographs but surely some creative, timeless images of your wedding day should be high up in the list of priorities?

    And whilst I’m belly-aching, this thread has turned into a one-upmanship competition to determine who has managed to spend the least. Human rituals are as important today as they were when we were still sacrificing goats. Not something to be ashamed of… At least buy a decent goat.

    aphex_2k
    Member

    We hired a villa in Tuscany and had my folks and bro, and her folks and sister there for a week. Got married in Lucca in an 18th C palace then went down to Amalfi coast for honeymoon. Neither of us wanted a big white wedding with people, just our nearest and dearest. Had a blast.

    When we came back we hired a village hall, did our own music, food, toys games and a massive bouncy castle. Again, roaring success and had a blast.

    Don’t do anything to impress others, do what you want and enjoy yourselves.

    crankboy
    Member

    User-removed I’m not seeking to slag off your industry just pointing out that the human ritual of publicly committing to your partner does not need to be an exercise in conspicuous consumption nor a cash harvesting exercise for a dedicated industry.

    If I wanted to brag about cheapness I’d have mentioned other weddings eg. Paid for the registry office non wedding dress from a catalogue . Meal in a Chinese no presents buy your own food then on to the pub.

    agent007
    Member

    Been to many weddings where unlimited cash seemed to have been thrown at the things (including a wedding where the wedding present to the bride and groom from the bride’s father was a brand new Aston Martin) – but all of them pretty bland really, not that memorable and blend into each other.

    The wedding we went to which really stood out from the rest was the simplest and cheapest. Hire of boat on lake for ceremony, followed by marquee on the lake shore with good food, free beer, fine wine and a DJ. Very simple, the most personal and all that was needed for a good time.

    Ours was 12k with fancy venue, sit down meal, designer dress (my suit was from debenhams though!), hired two boats, loads of booze, evening buffet. Missus is creative though o we did loads of the decorating etc ourselves. So loads of room to cut costs. 10k is plenty if you avoid champagne, wedding cars, favours, a billion bridesmaids, suits for best man, get a mate to do photography etc. If in marquee just buy loads of booze from the supermarket, been to plenty of great weddings with pie and peas on instead of a fancy meal. Nice surroundings, people you actually want to spend the day with, dancing, good (but not necessarily expensive) food, job done (DO NOT suggest scrimping on the dress though!)

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