If vampires were real….

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  • If vampires were real….
  • loddrik
    Member

    Would you want to be one?

    If the tv is anything to go by they always seem to get decent looking women, the advent of decent LED technology means that night rides only shouldn’t be a problem. Eternal life means that you’d outlast the 650b and 29er fashions, possibly. Maybe future rubber shortages might mean mtb in the future might be limited to 8″ wheels.

    Might be interesting to see if we all end up as either Muslims or atheists, or vampires….

    Wish I could just get back to bloody sleep!!!

    loddrik
    Member

    I seem to be awake all night like a vampire. Blood tastes bloody horrible though. Maybe if vampires only ever ate bacon sandwiches it’d be doable…

    loddrik
    Member

    Maybe vampires are a little camp to live off bacon sandwiches. Not that it precludes camp people enjoying bacon sandwiches, just doesn’t seem a very camp food.

    loddrik
    Member

    What the **** is a camp food anyway..??

    loddrik
    Member

    Blood, I guess… ๐Ÿ˜•

    loddrik
    Member

    But then I wouldn’t exactly call fleas or Mosquitos camp.

    Does that make them vampires?

    loddrik
    Member

    What would happen if a zombie bit a vampire or a vampire bit a zombie?

    loddrik
    Member

    If a zombie bites you you turn into a zombie. If a vampire bites you you turn into a vampire.

    What happens when you are bitten by a catholic? Or a Conservative??

    My god, that last one doesn’t bare thinking about!!!

    Premier Icon mattbee
    Subscriber

    I’m almost loathe to be the only other voice on this thread as it’s a work of genius so far but you are right, there seems to be very little to moan about being a modern vampire.
    Unless you are one, then there is. It seems to turn you into some sort of rambling, sleep deprived nut job… ๐Ÿ˜‰

    loddrik
    Member

    Ahh bollox. I’m going to tesco to fill the car up. If I encounter any vampires or zombies on the way I’ll try and engage them in some existential discussion to avoid getting bitten. Too tired to run.

    jekkyl
    Member

    Yes I would like to be a vampire.
    Can we fly, like in the lost boys?
    Can we go out in the daylight, like in Twilight?

    Premier Icon boltonjon
    Subscriber

    Imagine the air you could get??

    You wouldn’t even need lights when night riding, because you’d be able to see in the dark

    Would you let Selene catch you??


    Kate-Beckinsale-Underworld-4-Awakening-image by boltonjon, on Flickr

    Premier Icon breadcrumb
    Subscriber

    Instead of drinking blood could I eat black pudding?

    Tom83
    Member

    If a vampire bit a zombie, nowt would happen. Zombies don’t have a pulse, so the vampire would just be left with a dirty taste in it’s mouth, shirley?

    heisenberg
    Member

    Do vampires go to heaven? .. If they do, then its ok ๐Ÿ™‚ ..everlasting bike ride without fear of black routes or double black ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

    unovolo
    Member

    As long as I didnt have to look like this…

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    Interview with a Vampire series dealt with this quite well.

    Premier Icon sandwicheater
    Subscriber

    Hahahah, hadn’t clocked the first few posts were all loddrik talking to himself, brilliant!!

    ninfan
    Member

    Depends where you live – would be a bit of a b’stard relying on virgins as a primary food source round here…

    Plus werewolves probably make better boyfriends – at least they would be nicer to cuddle up to in bed!

    CountZero
    Member

    Plus werewolves probably make better boyfriends – at least they would be nicer to cuddle up to in bed!

    Well, Willow in Buffy had a werewolf boyfriend:

    She found Tara much more cuddly in bed:


    ๐Ÿ˜‰

    matther01
    Member

    Mmmmm….Kate Beckinsale……

    CountZero
    Member

    Still, if vampires were real, I’d want to look like him:

    Or him:

    Fat chance of that, though… ๐Ÿ™

    Premier Icon Northwind
    Subscriber

    loddrik – Member

    If the tv is anything to go by they always seem to get decent looking women, the advent of decent LED technology means that night rides only shouldn’t be a problem.

    LED lights throw tons of ultraviolet so you’ll be fine til your mate accidentally shines his light on you and you catch fire.

    monkeyfudger
    Member

    sandwicheater –
    Hahahah, hadn’t clocked the first few posts were all loddrik talking to himself, brilliant!!

    Hadn’t realised either, really quite entertaining when I scrolled back up.

    Being a vampire would be awesome, don’t think the killing/drinking blood would bother me all that much if I got to live forever. They always seem to be loaded to eh! The Mrs is already pretty allergic to the sun so it wouldn’t really change much….

    Vampires suck

    Premier Icon Cougar
    Subscriber

    Still, if vampires were real, I’d want to look like him:

    So would I, if it meant I got the attention of,

    Ok, she’d be trying to kill me but, hey, what a way to go.

    emsz
    Member

    Eternal life

    hmmmm, not sure, aren’t they the undead…which doesn’t sound quite so appealing

    Obligatory posts of pictures of Kate B in a catsuit… [drifts away for a min] eerrrr, what? oh yes, are a bad thing, you bad men.

    Premier Icon boltonjon
    Subscriber

    When looking for the photos of Kate B in a catsuit, i got very distracted by lots of photos of Kate B in catsuits.

    In the end, I was nearly 20 minutes late for work ๐Ÿ™‚

    JEngledow
    Member

    Knowing my luck I’d end up more like one of these vampires:

    jekkyl
    Member

    I’d be the dexter of the Vampire world just killing those that deserve it. It’d be mint to be able to go night riding without lights and of course all vampires have increased strength so you could cycle all night at full speed.
    what bike would a vampire have?

    Orange Blood

    Junkyard
    Member

    I would rather be a vampire than a werewolf or zombie

    The vegan thing may make my incarnation a little short lived though

    mightymule
    Member

    Still, if vampires were real, I’d want to look like him:

    I’d quite like you to look like him too…..

    back2basics
    Member

    mmmmmmmmmmmmm Faith

Viewing 37 posts - 1 through 37 (of 37 total)

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