What’s the definition of endless love?
Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles playing tennis.
What do you call a woman with a chimney on her head?
Ruth.
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff.
What do you call a man with a spade in his head?
Doug.
What do you call a man with a ship on his head?
Captain boat hat.
What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks?
Men. Get in the tanks.
Two cows in a field. One says “here mate, are you worried about that mad cow disease thing?” The other replies “nah mate, doesn’t bother me”. “Why not?” asks the first cow. “Cos I’m a chicken” comes the reply.
Two fish in a tank. One says to the other “how the hell do you drive this thing?”