Got it proper good, went back to check it was dead but it’d scarpered.

Knocked on a couple of doors but nobody was in. I’m left feeling a little guilty as I’d want to know if any kitteh I owned was by now dead. Is there anything more that I can do?

And most importantly, what’s your biggest road kill?

A few years ago I ran over a cat on my road bike – both wheels 🙁

It bolted off, no idea where it went and we wern’t by any houses at the time so no doors to knock on.

Still feel bad about it

A cat hit me recently (honest, it looked like it was going to cross in front then panicked and ran along side the car and then I guess panicked again and ran into my car, luckily it just bounced off the wheel and then ran off :p ) but I did wonder what I’d do if I squashed one. It’s unlikely it would be from the houses immediately around so I guess it would be a case of me taking it to the vet but then who pays? Call me callous but I don’t fancy paying £100’s for someone else’s cat that had a death wish…

Once ran over a kitten with a quad bike on the farm. A couple days of care and clostrum from the dairy and it was right as rain.

This one was gone, nowhere to be seen.

It just ran out from a drive and I was doing about 30, went striaght over its middle. It did a comedy American wrestling writhe around from what I could see in my RVM but was gone by the time I pulled over and walked back.

Driving through Holmfirth many years ago and a fox jumped over a wall straight under my front wheel and did the whole bumpity bump thing.

It was about 80 miles before I dared to stop and look in case I found a seriously pissed off fox glaring at me from the wheel arch.

I was run into by a badger. My lights smashed miles from home in the dark, badger okay.

I have cycled into a New Forest pony. Both of us shocked and okay

My Dad drove into a golden retriever and wrote of his Peugeot, the dog was okay.

A deer stuck it’s head in front of my car. Smashed the headlight and left the head embedded in the radiator, deer did not survive being decapitated.

I head butted a pheasant while on a moped. I was okay, the pheasant was sat there stunned so I tweaked it’s neck and took it home for dinner.

I hit three fox cubs in one go once 🙁

A duck that was trying to cross the M1 on foot.

I hit three fox cubs in one go once

You’re a monster.

I once hit a chicken crossing the road.

There is no punchline.

It died.

Is there anything you won’t do to get some pussy?

Maybe you can take a picture, put a witty caption with it and start a “Lolflats” website

My dog caught a cat while my wife was taking her on a walk. It gave it a good shake. My wife got the dog of, tied it up and went to check on the cat but it had gone.

I head butted a pheasant while on a moped. I was okay, the pheasant was sat there stunned so I tweaked it’s neck and took it home for dinner

haha, brilliant! Can just imagine someone riding a moped with a pheasant hanging off the back.

A lot of road kill there, are you up in Scotland?

I once hit a chicken crossing the road.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To see it’s flat mate

Maybe you can take a picture

I had my camera phone at the ready, but as I say it was gone. 🙁

Cotswolds… this was my first domestic kill.

Not quite the same as running it over, but I have given a badger a chinese burn

I ran over a pheasant once. All feathers and stuff in me grill.
Friend who was following was all upset and emotional and tried to rescue it. Silly veggies.

Not quite the same as running it over, but I have given a badger a chinese burn

I doubt that. A badger would have torn your face off before you even got into optimum grip position.

All feathers and stuff in me grill.

Nothing worse than heading for a night out, and getting a pheasant all up in your grill.

When I was a kid my dad hit a cow. We were in a Morris Oxford, came round a corner in Dumfries somewhere (heading for Stranraer), wall to wall cows, he hit one side on at about 15mph, took her legs clean out, she did a perfect roll up the bonnet, screen, roof and boot, landed perfectly on all four hooves and walked off, cool as you like. All the other cows looking on going WTF! Mum dad and four kids in the back screaming and turning to jelly. Don’t know how we made the ferry that night. Not a mark on the car, either.

A barn owl flew through the windscreen of my lorry when I drove for Parcelforce. I flicked it out of the cab and drove back over it.

There must be a few soft badgers in the world Jamie.

There must be a few soft badgers in the world Jamie.

…but can you risk it though? You creep up on what you think is a softie…….THEN BOOM!

Badgers got your balls.

was run into by a badger. My lights smashed miles from home in the dark, badger okay.

I have cycled into a New Forest pony. Both of us shocked and okay

My Dad drove into a golden retriever and wrote of his Peugeot, the dog was okay.

A deer stuck it’s head in front of my car. Smashed the headlight and left the head embedded in the radiator, deer did not survive being decapitated.

I head butted a pheasant while on a moped. I was okay, the pheasant was sat there stunned so I tweaked it’s neck and took it home for dinner.

Flippin eck WCA – you do seem to be living up to your moniker…. 😀

I read that as ‘chinese BUM’……..

Various pheasants, rabbits, pigeons and a couple of cats. Had a pheasant the other month flew out of a hedge straight into the side of my van, dried pheasant blood doesn’t wash off easily 🙁

Some cats do have a death wish. One walked out in front of me cool as a cucumber the other day when I was doing about 30. Emergancy stop screeched to a halt 6 foot in front of it and he just sat down and licked its nads. Beeping the horn only made him momentarily look up before continuing the job at hand (Tounge).
In the end I had to get out and nearly boot it just to get it to move out of the road.

I hit a pheasant at 90mph+ in my XR2 up Buxton way many years ago, ripped both spot lights off and smashed the front grill to many pieces.

Biggest road kill had to be a Labrador when I was 16. I used to nick the keys for my old mans VW beetle that was stored in a garage across town. Anyways came through a village a bit stoned and a bit too fast and hit a Labrador head on. It was a horrible noise of skull against solid metal bumper. I can still hear it to this day. Not my proudest moment and couldn’t stop due to the lack of licence. To top it all off it was still on one of those extendable leads.! Never took the car out again after that as I don’t think I could have lived with myself if it was a child, killing a doggy was bad enough.

Oh the follies of youth.!

Xckeith, why do you think it didn’t bite my face off?

A mate crashed into a badger night riding, the badger caught a glancing blow and spuin off into the bushes. We came around the corner to find a gibbering mate, still clipped into his pedals whilst lying on the floor whilst lyin on the floor screamin “jessus it’s commin for me” and trying to fend off a grumpy badger with his camelback. The badger looked at us, made some grumbly badger noises that were the the equivilent of ” yeh I’d have you all, one paw tied behind my back” and then mooched off into the woods.

I killed a cat on my motorbike, it was dark and I did not see it and it hit my foot. I went back to check on it and its head had turned round 180 degrees, so I think it was dead.

I have also hit 2 wood pigeons and a barn owl. The barn owl was a bit strange as when I went back to check on it there was another one lying dead in the side of the road. I wonder if the one I hit was its mate and it was pining for other one in the place where it had died?

to find a gibbering mate, still clipped into his pedals whilst lying on the floor whilst lyin on the floor screamin “jessus it’s commin for me” and trying to fend off a grumpy badger with his camelback.

PMSL… would’ve been hilarious to see, I trust you don’t (and never will) let him live this one down? 😆

Let me see…
Crow through headlight
Badger through radiator and cracked the front bumper
Pheasant full on at 60mph+ whilst overtaking.
Chased a Pheasant for 1/2 mile up the road before I finally got it, stooopeeed bird!

Rabbit and a Squirrel confirmed kills 🙁

The Rabbit was on the MTB… took it home,skinned and ate it 🙂 Quite Nice and it tasted of …………..

tazzy… It’s the stuff nightmares are made of…

Quite Nice and it tasted of …………..

Chicken? High rollers?

I took out a whole pile of possums once in a oner.

Car in front of me hit a cat once, so I stopped, the poor thing was still alive. Sent boyfriend to call the owners, me and the lady then had a competition for who could cry the most in a public street as it kind of twitched and howled for a while, then breathed it’s last.

This is the kind of thing that keeps me awake when my cat is out on night patrol…

I hit half a dozen cows yesterday afternoon. Slowly though, just to encourage them along a lane and out of my way, so I don’t think it counts.

You can have as many cows as you like as long as you don’t have potatoes or bread with them.

Oops, sorry, wrong thread.

I hit a pigeon once…it was still alive in the grill when I arrived 2 hours later.

Grill needs to be on high for 20 minutes to cook a pigeon