It has been suggested that I start a blog as a form of therapy. Something I could look back at and see how things have changed etc. Similar to what I have done here, but more in depth. I was hesitant at first, then I read the unfortunate thread titled “Suicide” and it made me think. With what I have been through, that could quite easily be me. So i decided to do this website/blog and make it public. I hope if a wider audience is able to see it and others read it, then it might help them as well.

If one person can be helped through my experiences, then I am good with that.

I mentioned this to a few people before and they asked for the Web address when it is published. It is early days, but it is published. I still have things to do to it, images and fine tuning but it has taken a week to be able to write what I have so far. The first page is quite long, it is a round up of life from our beginning to the unfortunate end. My Journey is the blog part that goes from there. I also have a contact section so people can email me direct. If I can help or support anyone then I am happy to do so.

It will improve like I said, hopefully over the next few days. Please share as much as you can, my aim is to show that emotions are ok, talking is vital and support works, whatever the situation.

https://brighteststarinthesky.com

Thanks.

gnusmas, lost for words, what a lovely but tragic piece of writing.

Best wishes to you and your family

GD

G, the strength of character you have shown in your posts on here from the very start is startling. And now you aspire to help others by sharing your experiences. Frankly, chapeau my friend. I wish you the very best; far from failing them as you fear, your kids have got a great, great role model in you.

Brilliantly written, really hammers home what a tough time you really have had, really hope it helps as a coping tool,onwards and upward for you and all the family.

Just your website address brought a tear to my eye before I even opened it. Fair play to you.

I’ve just read it- beautifully written and very moving. Thanks for sharing.

I’m blubbing.

How did you write that?

Stay strong, especially for the children.

Sorry I haven’t got the vocabulary to express myself. Big hugs dude, one day at a time.

That’s beautifully written, it was more than a little dusty as I read it. Keep going G, life can be tough but I have huge admiration for what you’re doing and how you’re doing it.

Thankyou for your comments, they mean a lot.

Starting writing was lovely and quite easy. Thinking of our memories together from the start, made me smile and remember things I hadn’t thought of in a while. As I progressed it became more difficult. The raw recent events were painful to recapture, and to put down. It did take about a week on and off to be able to write it. Have just updated a bit about the funeral on the blog too.

Remembering to put things in is a struggle. Not everything will be in the order it happened. Once I have caught up to today it will be easier to update as and when I need to. Everything is written from the heart, so isn’t going to be perfect. It is hard to write and share everything, but others out there will be going through their own battles. If one person is inspired or helped by reading it, then some good has come out of my unfortunate and devastating situation.

Thankyou all again, you are all amazing.

Alan

Dude – YOU are amazing, I have no idea how you found the strength to get through that, I wish all of you the very best. Dusty in here this morning.

Nice blogging. You will get through this.

I was fine reading that until the last paragraph. That was emotional. Thank you for sharing.

Well written, well done sir, writing things down helps, re kindles memories some good some upsetting, but theyre memories that cant be erased, and youve shared them , youll get support from all that read the above blog.

Your blog will also help others in a similar situation.

Thank you for sharing, you are stronger than you know, I doubt many people could get through the events you have described so well. Wishing all the best for you and your family going forwards.

Steve

We are all here for you.

Anytime.

Bunnyhop x

Bloody hell mate.  The final three paragraphs of that post.  What incredible strength that must’ve taken.

Today is a bad day. Very bad. I did have a good couple of hours earlier and started sorting the kids clothes out. But it’s all gone since then. Can’t put my finger on it, just don’t know why. Probably cause the kids are bored, it is raining again and we are all stuck in the house. They have completely trashed the house today.

On the upside, i had a phone call from Ambrose earlier. Luckily when I was in the middle of my good bit. He is popping round for a cuppa in the morning, so will be nice to see him again. And tomorrow afternoon I have an appointment with the counselling team for the kids. They need an update on how they are doing ready for their counselling when they go back to school. I’m still waiting though.

As far as my blog goes, just being honest. Writing things as they come to mind and telling it from the heart. Nearly caught up to the present day in the My Journey section. Doubt the Our Life Story page will change much apart from some images.

To top it all off, the last 2 weeks have been a struggle. Money got sorted, and then it all stopped again. They had me down as deceased as well so everything stopped. Hoping all is back on track by the end of the week. But we’ll see.

Then my phone broke last week. Luckily, 2 days before I got all the pictures and stuff from it ready for my blog, so they are all safe. Then on friday the telly blew up! Nothing ever seems to go smoothly for us 😟

Very moving!

Haven’t been able to update my blog lately, really tough couple of weeks and been one hell of a struggle. I will update it soon, now my head is a little bit clearer.

But some good has come from it. I have been informed that someone has benefitted from it. Someone in America who is going through an extremely messy divorce and custody battle has said she was inspired by my blog. What she said was, if I can do what I have had to do and get through it, then she can face this head on.

I have always said, if my blog helps one person in their own situation then it is worthwhile. This seems to be the case. I hope it will help others too.

Finding out that positive influence is a win for today.  It’s something to take away and maybe build upon.

Obviously life is tough, right now – but take these little wins when you get them.  More will come – even when it doesn’t feel like it.

Finally managed to update the blog section of the website. There will be more to come, but that is enough for now. Will be trying to keep on top of it again now this past stressful month is over.

Gnusmas, you continue to be an inspiration to many of us, who haven’t ever had to face what you’ve been dealing with (and continue to do so) let alone with such dignity and humility.

Please know that you’ve already helped lots of people and we’re all rooting for you.

Sounds weird, since we’ve never met, but there’s loads of love coming your way, dude.

I’ve only just seen this as I’m not a frequent visitor to the site.

My wife was a teacher and her teaching assistant died after a battle with cancer. She was a similar age to your wife. Her husband, with three children, also wrote a blog. Although I have never met him, as with yours, it left me in tears after every update.

I’m more into the maths and engineering than the written emotion. Even so, at times I have written my emotions down. I went through a bad patch with work and took some professional therapy. One of the ways to deal with difficulty, so very often, is to write it down. It worked for me. It stopped the random thoughts bouncing around in my head and established some sense of order.

If, in writing down how you feel it helps you, its a big plus. I feel that if it helps you and helps somebody else deal with their difficulties its a massive plus and worth every word.

Your writing is inspirational as well as emotional. I cannot begin to imagine the difficulties that you have faced or are currently facing. Don’t be afraid to express yourself. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Don’t give up. Your family need you and you need them. While elements of the past have been difficult, the future, I am sure, has much which is positive to offer you.