I normally ride a Qoroz 29er hard tail.
On Monday, I rode to work on my Lynskey 29er hard tail. It felt different.
Today, after a couple of days riding the Lynskey, I got back on the Qoroz. It felt different again. Neither better or worse, just different.
We then went for a ride on the tandem. That felt different to both of them, but in a different way altogether.

I don’t think I’m cut out for bike tests and writing reviews.

You just need to flesh it out a bit by adding either ‘good’ different, or ‘bad’ different. Job done. That’s all I ask.

I rode a motorbike with about 3 psi in the front tyre and a MTB til the rear wheel fell out, I don’t think I’d make a good tester……

Could you tell it would be different just by putting your hand on it? That’s the test of a good journo.

Ssssssssssshhhhhhhh. All bikes are actually the same. They’re just not allowed to tell us that.

Kind of feel the same way about demoing a bike – changing stem and bars so completely changes the feel of a bike that unless you can compare your exact size/setup on one frame with another, it all gets a bit meaningless.

Were any of them laterally stiff yet vertically compliant?

MTG all your reviews would be the same

“I only rode the bike for 10 miles and it broke”

MidlandTrailquestsGraham

Careful. If you like two different bikes because they are different STW’ers will say you are being paid to like them and have no morals or objectivity.

A typical Bikeradar/mag review ‘the bike was great etc – the forks (Fox) were terrible/held it back’ (single pivot bike).

A typical Pinkbike review FOCUSES ON THE SINGLE PIVOT AND DESCRIBES HOW AN AVERAGE RIDER WILL STRUGGLE IN CERTAIN TERRAIN WHEREAS AN SKILLED RIDER WONT GO NEAR THE BRAKES ETC. It doesnt slag off forks.

Above is just a real simplification but guess where I go to for my reviews?

Dont do yourself down you’re nearly there. All you need to do is coin a label for each of those differences and you’re there.

It doesnt need to mean anything, you dont need to weigh anything or investigate anything with graphs (unless its a german magazine) its just a label that fills column inches. It either needs to be written as a trueism so you flatter the reader into thinking they are in on some inside knowledge: ‘that steel is real feeling’, or put it down to the alternative axle standard or rear gear cable orientation. Here the important thing is that the newsest solution is the best to keep the advertisers happy.

When we moved over to the tandem our tester could imeadiately feel that longer-than-a-normal-bike-with-two-people-on-it feel that any good tandem has. Upfront our testers could imeadiately feel the 2.5 in the new 12.5 axle standard and agreed that it was part of what made the bike.

Placebo effect

You need to do some blind tests. Grab a blindfold and try again.

The reason you haven’t mustered an opinion is that you haven’t been paid by one manufacturer to give a favourable review.

MTQ
You will never make it as a bike journo.as you are just too far behind the curve.Both bike are rubbish as they are the wrong size. 27.5 is the Holy Grail doncha know?

I don’t think I’m cut out for bike tests and writing reviews.

Not entirely sure you’re cut out for writing forum posts. I kept waiting for the rage and brimstone!

Do both of them have Lefties, belt drives and/ or Rohloffs?
And which made the trail come alive (TM)?

I don’t think I’m cut out for bike tests and writing reviews.

Clearly. Not mentioning the wheel size of the tandem is a massive failure.

You already told me more about the bikes than most reviews. Stick as much manufacturer blurb and buzzwords in between what you’ve got in the OP and jobs a good ‘un

You missed out the ‘once we replaced the wheels, tyres, forks and had the suspension custom tuned it was a great bike’ bit for one and the ‘this one had horrible grips and is a rubbish bike’ for the other part of the review.

You told me all I need to know about all the bikes in your head to head to head review.

How do I get get a subscription to MTGBUK? I demand a picture of you and your wife doing a Doddy gurn on the tandem on the cover of issue 1.

Did you “Enduro” on either? If not, there’s ya problem!

More seriously, i think modern bike mags, are often a bit “forced” by opinion, advertising, or just fitting in with the cool crowd, to mistake good/bad for just different!

For example, most people would describe the colour Blue as Different to the colour Yellow. Only people who personally prefer Yellow would describe it as “Better than Blue”……..

Did you have to replace the stock 800mm bars because they weren’t wide enough for your preferences?

What inspired this thread was not just the way I laugh at most bike reviews, but some recent bike maintenance on Mrs MTG’s bike (a Kona Big Unit Rohloff, since you ask).
While swapping bits around, I pinched the 175mm cranks off her bike for my Lynskey, and gave her some 165mm cranks I had lying around.
She knew I was swapping the handlebars, so I told her I had changed something else as well and could she work out what it was.
She’s been riding the bike a few days now and still keeps asking me what I have done. It feels better, but she can’t work out why. 🙂

Could you tell it would be different just by putting your hand on it?

Seriously, you should be able to tell what it’s made of by touching, at least detect the Al one.

Cut and paste depending on the mag you intend to write for

STW : The sandwich had lemon humus and the view was nice.
MBUK: It was totally sick rad, I broke my arm pissing about with ratboy for the LOLZ
MBR: the shock was terrible the paint job awful and it weighed too much; 10/10
Dirt: it was too small
Cycle Weekly: mountain bike… Hmmmm… Sorry, no never heard of them.

It must be a rather depressing job working in most “sports” magazines. There is basically bugger all to say after the first few editions. It then becomes of repetition and fake stories. How does the golf mag market stay afloat? There are not 12 different ways to play a bunker shot per year!

Tri magazines really take the biscuit. This month we test elastic laces…….how to cut T2 by that all important second….

nick1962 – Member

MTQ
You will never make it as a bike journo.as you are just too far behind the curve.Both bike are rubbish as they are the wrong size. 27.5 is the Holy Grail doncha know?

I thought it was fatbikes this week? Damn, I’m behind the times..

teamhurtmore – Member
It must be a rather depressing job working in most “sports” magazines. There is basically bugger all to say after the first few editions. It then becomes of repetition and fake stories. How does the golf mag market stay afloat? There are not 12 different ways to play a bunker shot per year!

Tri magazines really take the biscuit. This month we test elastic laces…….how to cut T2 by that all important second….

I used to work for a windsurfing magazine. Board and sail tests in general we’re easy as the gear did change constantly. If you didn’t sail enough you may not notice the differences, and looking at the way some guys on the beach miss rigged their gear that wasn’t hard to understand.
The problem would be the two or three wetsuit tests a year. Now THAT took some creative writing.

I heckled ed today 😆

I salute you all. This is probably the best/most honest thread I have seen in ages.

It convey’s the exact reason a friend has ceased his magazine subscriptions.

We bought What Mounatin bike recently on a road trip to Peebles, it had a list of what it considered the top trail bikes. The only criticism for the Canyon was that the large was too short. Highly subjective, based purely on the reviewers opinion. They did have a dig somewhere else in the magazine about Canyon’s being cheap because they are bikes in boxes – all bikes come in boxes, it’s just a matter of who opens them!

That is all, continue being awesome.

I read a couple of MBUK / MBR mags (hard to tell them apart) the other week and they were singing the praises of some new £1000 Halfords or Evans hardtail, saying how well it handled when compared to similar bikes on the test

They gave it a 10/10, primarily for its ‘playful handling’

Yep – you’ve guessed it – as it was the only 26″ wheeled bike from the 4 in the test

So – was this a slight admission that 29ers are actually crap for handling and that they’ve all been sprouting utter bollocks for the last 4 years?? 🙂