Home Forums Chat Forum Hurty words on Facebook…

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  • Hurty words on Facebook…
  • 9
    MoreCashThanDash
    Full Member

    Colleague sat next to me came out with this delightful phrase in an (internal) phone call earlier this morning. “Go to prison for longer for using hurty words on Facebook that you do for tax fraud”.

    How **** ignorant and unprofessional can you get?

    He’s no longer on our team after being promoted a year or so back. I’m not particularly surprised by his opinion, as he’s always fancied himself as a “working class Tory”, but did not think he was stupid enough to say something like that in the office.

    To a colleague of South Asian background.

    In an area where about half the staff are non-white ethnicity, and even the “white” contingent include a Pole and a Brazilian, though I don’t think anyone else heard it.

    Thought I may have over-reacted by mentioning it to a more senior manager. Apparently I did not over-react, but I think she wants to.

    Serves the idiot right.

    8
    alanl
    Free Member

    No, I can’t see what’s wrong with saying that. What was the context I’m missing?

    5
    Drac
    Full Member

    Well done on raising it.

    3
    finbar
    Free Member

    Think I’ve often said things like that but replace “tax fraud” with “killing a cyclist”.

    2
    grahamt1980
    Full Member

    Inappropriate yes,  and he is clearly a bellend but personally I would have ignored.

    3
    matt_outandabout
    Full Member

    Agreed that raising it up was the correct thing to do. I behave differently at work than I do at home, there’s professional standards and integrity needed in a different way.
    (That’s not too say I’m a racist bigot at home BTW!)

    6
    Mister-P
    Free Member

    Have I missed something in the news recently that would help this make sense?

    4
    thegeneralist
    Free Member

    I’m lost. More info needed

    4
    sc-xc
    Full Member

    Have you lot been living on the moon since the riots in the summer?

    I agree, and good on you for reporting. It’s this casual kind of hate we need to stand against.

    4
    chakaping
    Full Member

    Without context that would appear to be an ignorant thing to say, but not particularly offensive to South Asians.

    Fill in the blanks for us OP?

    14
    lamp
    Free Member

    There is absolutely nothing wrong with what he said. Stop being so sensitive. Unprofessional yes, but nothing to get excited about.

    5
    desperatebicycle
    Full Member

    Have you lot been living on the moon since the riots in the summer?

    I wasn’t aware that I was on the moon, but I guess I must’ve been. Does “hurty words” actually mean “racist abuse” or something?

    14
    MoreCashThanDash
    Full Member

    Inappropriate yes, and he is clearly a bellend but personally I would have ignored.

    I did think I should do that, but I was so shocked I’d actually heard it out loud I kind of knee jerked.

    For those who’ve missed it “Hurty words on Facebook” is the phrase used to describe the comments made on social media inciting violence/arson/riot/murder by those outraged that the posters were jailed for the crimes.

    Which thinking about it again as I type, makes me more convinced I did the right thing. Even if he is just ignorant and was using an edgy sounding phrase he didn’t understand, that can’t be allowed to become acceptable.

    10
    kilo
    Full Member

    It’s a little phrase used by apologists for racists to down play the offences rioters were convicted of by falsely equating offences such as racially aggravated intentional harassment or inciting racial hatred with using hurty words on Facebook.

    Unprofessional yes, but nothing to get excited about.

    But in the work place you’re supposed to be professional .

    7
    Jamz
    Free Member

    I’m struggling to see what’s wrong with it. HMRC are notoriously crap at achieving successful prosecutions.

    5
    nbt
    Full Member

    I want aware of the context but now you’ve clarified i would say you did the right thing

    2
    desperatebicycle
    Full Member

    For those who’ve missed it “Hurty words on Facebook” is the phrase used to describe the comments made on social media inciting violence/arson/riot/murder

    Hmm, yes I think I have a colleague who’d enjoy adopting such a phrase. I wouldn’t report him, but I would call him out on it. I’ve called him out on things in the past and made him actually think about these things instead of blindly adopting them as his own.

    5
    the-muffin-man
    Full Member

    …I’d best stop saying “I’d get less for murder” every wedding anniversary then!

    4
    bikesandboats
    Free Member

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cm2499671e0o An example of “hurty words”

    A man who called for mosques to be burnt with worshippers inside during the summer riots in the UK has been jailed for two years.

    Mentioning it to a manager was the right thing, I’m sure he won’t be sacked for it (unless he’s been saying “hurty words” on FB) but it’s unprofessional and probably shows that he’s a dick.

    8
    fenderextender
    Free Member

    The “Hurty Words” trope is from Farage describing incitement to violence and inciting racial hatred with specific reference to the riots of late summer this year.

    Your colleague’s usage of this marks them down as a ****.

    If it was apropos of nothing and something they were clearly desperate to shoehorn into the conversation, no matter how incongruous…

    It marks them down as an even bigger ****.

    8
    Cougar
    Full Member

    For those who’ve missed it “Hurty words on Facebook” is the phrase used to describe the comments made on social media inciting violence/arson/riot/murder

    Came here to say this.  It’s a very specific choice of words parroted by the same sorts of people who came out with “we won you lost get over it.”  He hasn’t come up with it spontaneously, he’s repeated what he’s read/heard by another imbecile.  It’s exclusively used to trivialise hate speech, particularly of the racial variety.  I would posit that the colleague either knew exactly what he was saying or he’s so stupid that he shouldn’t be out of the house without a handler.

    soundninjauk
    Full Member

    It’s a very specific choice of words parroted by the same sorts of people who came out with “we won you lost get over it.” He hasn’t come up with it spontaneously, he’s repeated what he’s read/heard by another imbecile. It’s exclusively used to trivialise hate speech, particularly of the racial variety.

    This was all entirely news to me, but sounds like  you did exactly the right thing.

    fenderextender
    Free Member

    ^^^

    Precisely. It’s the sort of thing my BiL comes out with when he’s had a couple and thinks he’s in a safe space. It is usually in a conversation that extols the virtues of Jordan Peterson and includes the phrase “you’d never get away with that these days” a lot.

    I tend to make my excuses at that point.

    2
    scotroutes
    Full Member

    For those who’ve missed it “Hurty words on Facebook” is the phrase used to describe the comments made on social media inciting violence/arson/riot/murder by those outraged that the posters were jailed for the crimes.

    Well, that’s news to me and I wouldn’t have known it if not for this thread. I can well imagine using that exact phrase (see also: killing a cyclist) without even realsing the context to which it has been misappropriated. I assume you know your colleague and what he was describing well enough that you can be sure he was aware of the current meme?

    3
    Duggan
    Full Member

    For those who’ve missed it “Hurty words on Facebook” is the phrase used to describe the comments made on social media inciting violence/arson/riot/murder by those outraged that the posters were jailed for the crimes.

    I also have to say that I literally had no idea at all that this had any sort of hidden meaning.

    3
    zomg
    Full Member

    That’s the thing with dog whistles, isn’t it. Those not in the know don’t recognise them, and those for whom they’re intended take comfort from knowing they’re in like-minded company. If the organisation doesn’t act strongly enough it risks real reputation harm. If it were someone I managed I’d expect at least a written warning for a first offence depending on context, with a likely reduction for some hasty contrition.

    4
    scotroutes
    Full Member

    It can only be “a first offence” if it was deliberately offensive. As this thread shows, many folk simply wouldn’t know this. Only the OP has any idea if it was used in an offensive context.

    3
    sadexpunk
    Full Member

    I also have to say that I literally had no idea at all that this had any sort of hidden meaning.

    same.  if id heard that id have just assumed he meant being a general @rse or bullying over SM or something….

    3
    mattsccm
    Free Member

    Unless you aware of the phrases apparent new meaning then it is irrelevant. I hadn’t got a clue and would object strongly to be told that I was living on the moon.

    Actually I still don’t know what the OP has a problem with as I can’t be bothered to find out but I suspect that it is really just a matter of opinion anyway.

    2
    matt_outandabout
    Full Member

    Only the OP has any idea if it was used in an offensive context.

    I knew too.

    3
    MoreCashThanDash
    Full Member

    Actually I still don’t know what the OP has a problem with as I can’t be bothered to find out but I suspect that it is really just a matter of opinion anyway.

    Downplaying incitement to racially aggravated violence and arson is, at best, not appropriate in a workplace.

    Especially a very multicultural workplace.

    Especially by a relatively senior officer of the Crown.

    If he’d still been on my level and on my team, I’d have maybe just taken him to one side and told him what a dick he sounded like. But he’s now above my paygrade and so is tackling his behavior. I suspect/hope he’s parroting something he’s heard without understanding the full meaning, and will learn from this.

    A Nigerian born colleague also heard it and collared me as I left work as he suspected I’d done something about it. I suspect if my colleague had reported it it would look a lot worse.

    2

    @MoreCashThanDash

    He’s either dog-whistling or trying to be edgy, either way he sounds like a bit of a whopper.

    Loads of them in my gaff too.

    3
    scotroutes
    Full Member

    Only the OP has any idea if it was used in an offensive context.

    I knew too.

    There’s at least half a dozen folk on this thread that could have used that phrase without it being offensive. How would you know whether the OPs colleague was another of those?

    sirromj
    Full Member

    Can you furnish your argument with a couple of examples of using the phrase in a non offensive way?

    At the very least it is a dismissal of other peoples’ experience and an expression of the belief that one is superior to another – I’m better than you because I don’t get offended when people make offensive statements.

    7
    simondbarnes
    Full Member

    Any adult who uses the word hurty should be viewed with suspicion.

    1
    finbar
    Free Member

    +1 on the not knowing the dog whistle context, my comment at the top of the thread was ignorant of that.

    Can we also add people who use “hurty words” to the same list as grown adults who say “holibobs” and count the “number of sleeps” to Christmas?

    roger_mellie
    Full Member

    officer of the Crown.

    A what?

    3
    skellnonch
    Free Member

    So there’s a dick in your office, just tell him why he’s a dick, no need to go postal on here… i’m outraged by your outrage

    2
    DougD
    Full Member

    There’s at least half a dozen folk on this thread that could have used that phrase without it being offensive.

    But I don’t think there realistically is. Can anyone remember  hearing this phrase prior to the recent attempts to downplay the racially aggravated violence? I’d therefore assume that any current use of it is synonymous with the aforementioned attempt to downplay racism/xenophobia.

    1
    squirrelking
    Free Member

    @kilo thank you for answering the question and giving us context.

    I also had no bloody idea what the problem was until then.

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