How do I destroy keys?

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  • How do I destroy keys?
  • mogrim
    Member

    Recyling bin somewhere far from home?

    Premier Icon paulosoxo
    Subscriber

    just put them down somewhere.

    They’ll vanish, you’ll need to use the phrase ‘I just had ’em’ or else they’ll come back mind

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    Saw
    hammer
    pliers
    file
    axe
    wrecking ball
    thermic lance

    Or just bury them.

    simonfbarnes
    Member

    I’ve never thought to want to do this, but if I did I’d clamp the key in the vice and hammer the prongs a bit

    jackthedog
    Member

    Use a ring ended spanner to bend them all beyond use.

    Premier Icon BoardinBob
    Subscriber

    Put them in a lock and snap them off

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    Tie them to a petrol bomb and throw it at a fire-engine.

    Put them in a vice and enjoy ten minutes of agression releaving violence with a big hammer. Makes sure you do em up tight, dont want a key in the eye

    Gary_M
    Member

    Either bend them or put them in the bin. If they end up being found at the tip what do you think someone is going to do with a random set of keys that they couldn’t do with their own keys?

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    Feed them to a komodo dragon, then attach the komodo dragon to a rocket, tell it that you had its mum and she was crap, and then fire the rocket toward Mauritius.

    coffeeking
    Member

    Just drop them in someones wheelie bin a few miles away, they’ll never see the light of day again. It’d have to be something pretty valuable for someone to track them and get permission to dig them up from the landfill.

    theflatboy
    Member

    just put them in a bin on a street a fair way from your house.

    Just bin them – in a public bin if you want the trail to be cold. It would have to be a particularly dim burgler to go around trying every key in every door he can find trying to find the door it will open.

    grievoustim
    Member

    uri gellar style bending technique – my grandad managed to bend his car key whilst watching him on Wogan in the 80s

    Premier Icon paulosoxo
    Subscriber

    give them IWH

    finbar
    Member

    Before you throw them away you should file the edges smooth, or someone could find them and use them to scratch cars.

    Premier Icon BigDummy
    Subscriber

    Tie them up near a radio while Wogan is doing breakfast on Radio 2 and watch them chew their own legs off to escape.

    davidrussell
    Member

    ^harsh, but fair.

    why not go out and get pissed and leave them in a hundred different front doors all along a street (not your own), that would freak people out….

    ski
    Member

    Secretly add one to all your mates keyrings, will give them hours of fun trying to figure out what’s it for 😉

    mogrim
    Member

    Stick the tips in quick setting concrete, then chuck them in the nearest lake, let the little suckers sleep with the fishes.

    coffeeking
    Member

    Before you throw them away you should file the edges smooth, or someone could find them and use them to scratch cars.

    😆

    Premier Icon sweaman2
    Subscriber

    Moving house and having a clear-out. Have found a collection of keys, some of which are (I think) from previous owners etc as I can’t find a use for them.
    Although aware of the chances of them working on a random lock are slim I would be happier if knew they were put beyond use. But can’t seem to think of a simple way of doing this, anybody got any hints?

    Premier Icon sweaman2
    Subscriber

    Thanks all – some good and some amusing suggestions.. 😆

    Eggbox
    Member

    hide them in the panic room 😉

    Premier Icon Flaperon
    Subscriber

    Fasten interesting labels to them (“Top Secret Nuclear Bunker”, “Barclays Safe Master Key” etc) and drop them in the high street.

    blutac
    Member

    i’d get an angle grinder and watch the sparks fly 🙂

    Premier Icon jimmy
    Subscriber

    PMSL@BigD

    hehehehehehhehhee

    Rich
    Member

    BoardinBob – Member

    Put them in a lock and snap them off

    Hehe, then put a thread up asking how to get the rest of the key out.

    uplink
    Member

    Next time it’s a bit windy & stormy – pop out & find some kite flyers, now, unobtrusively attach a key to the kite string, repeat until your supply is exhausted.

    Premier Icon Coyote
    Subscriber

    I like Ski’s suggestion best.

    GTDave
    Member

    Store them in your “Man-Drawer”.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5qyJpAn2Wc

    coffeeking
    Member

    Give them to rob2 – he seems able to break them off in locks fairly well.

    No canals where you live ??

    b1galus
    Member

    i work in a scrap yard and i am amazed at the number of people who hand keys in to us

    tomzo
    Member

    Put them in a vice length ways, so as you tighten it up it will bend in half..

    avdave2
    Member

    Nice plan ski but can be improved by also removing a similar looking key from their keyring.

    Premier Icon mAx_hEadSet
    Subscriber

    Er grind a ninja death star grade edge on them walk through Bristol and throw them violently at any shell suited chav on a yeti or 2009 model kona or other such bike reported stolen on here over the last year

    CountZero
    Member

    PMSL@ some of the very inventive answers here. Excellent stuff.

    Hairychested
    Member

    Attach a “For You” pendant and drop it into a mate’s jacket pocket. His GF/wife will deal with them swiftly.

Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 43 total)

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