Too close?

Depends, is it a Danube Delta horse?

I wouldn’t buy one too close to the sea though, not unless it was a weston super mare

(best I could do)

More than a furlong…

If it was a seahorse then I’d suppose you’d have to. Hippos are also a kinda horse so I’d certainly make sure my horse was river located.

Depends on the neighbours.

Rivers would not be the mane reason I wouldn’t buy a horse.

I see all the standard horse gags are being trotted out

Depends how stable the water levels are

As always, it depends. An old one where you already know history and likely problems, possibly. But a new one is probably a bit foalish.

I’d want to be at least a fortnight away, give or take two weeks.

Wet look glue ?

Neighbors, very good.

Would you try to make it drink? Because then you’re onto a loser.

Would you try to make it drink?

You would just look a bit of an ass if you tried

Depends on how long its legs are. The safer option would be a giraffe.

Oh horse – sorry misread that.

Hippos are also a kinda horse

So are cats.

What tyres for marine equines?

I wouldn’t want to be saddled with the responsibility so would rein in the idea.