I’ve been lurking for ages and thought it was about time I signed up and join in the fun.

Please be gentle with me 😀

Show us yer bike, lawn and fence/wall.

Lager or bitter?
Ginger or lemon?

Look someone has to tell you this but Darth Vader is your Dad.

I sense a disturbance in the farce………

Don’t call your bike a “steed”. Don’t shave your legs.

Most other mistakes can be forgiven.

Have you got cock grips?

Yes it takes off.

Baby Robin.

Join a Union now.

You know I’m right and I’ll argue until everyone wanders off the thread.

Just use a hammer and a piece of wood.

No pay or big man?

Never disagree with Tandem Jeremey ever,

Never loose your sence of humour,

Never forget that unlike real life, arguments nad difference of opinion are always forgotten about next day,

Always post intimate and embarasing details of yourself on here, nobody who doesnt ride a bike ever reads this forum,

Post ranting details of how some bike shop or internet seller has appeared to rip you off,

Post pictures of your dodgy fence, wall and paving, more point are earned for weeds,

Never ever admit to liking David Cameroon or thatcher,

Think about joining a union,

Never antagonise the MODERATORS, they have the power of life and death…………….of threads.

Shaving/waxing of ones legs is fine as is wearing lycra/spandex, I Think it’s becomming a fettish the wearing of Lycra it feels so good 🙂

How many bikes do you own and what are they. Make sure one is 6″ full suss so you can laugh at the luddites, another is a rigid singlespeed so you can laugh at the “all the gear no idea” storm troopers, another needs to be a cross bike as that is the latest trend. It would be good to have a commuter so you can argue about anything car related and a road bike in case you are ever tempted to join your dad.

welcome to the madness 😉

Welcome , this is a verysmall corner of the interweb.
None of it is real ,so say anything you like without too much concern .
A bit like that bloke from Top Lear,you can always say you were joking or just add a 🙂
If you have lurked for a while (haven’t we all :wink:),then you will have sussed out what tyres, what bikes for under £5000 ,flats or spds,choice of helmet or soft hat,Baggies or evening wear,what 6000 lumen light for under a tenner(helmet mounted) and why trail centres matter .
Oh ,and always remembir yoor granmer and spilling when posting.

Have fun

Justify your wheel size

& never ask for advice cos you’ll only get opinions.
Even mine.

‘waves’

Yep, Looks like he’s gone. As you were. 😀

Greetings 😀

Southern shandy drinker or Northern monkey?
Cycling god or overweight numpty like most of us?

welcome! *raises glass*

hello waves 😀

Welcome.

Just don’t take anything from anyone personally. Its that simple.

Most of the biggest tools on here are really nice away from their keyboards and on a bike.

Well that didn’t go too well did it. Skywalker has gone. Do you think we maybe need a bit of work on the old welcoming situation?

Hello skywalker if you have gone back to lurking!

Don’t forget you may also need a 29″er single speed fixie rigid of course to be in with a change with the Trendies 😳

Come back, we miss you already

Welcome from the southwest desert of the US of A
Keep your sense of humor intact and you will find a good bunch on this site—a little arguing, a little opinion tossed about, good advice, a little flaming, but overall an entertaining and seemingly good group, (even though I haven’t met any in person).

they’re all fools, run for you life while you still have the chance. it’s like a cross between fawlty towers and the hotel california here.

FLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

other than that welcome, leave your dirty riding kit at the door and spring naked and full of the joys into the wonderful waters of sillytrackworld

You just know a thread with this title isn’t going to go well (let’s check out last time http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/hi-im-new )

Didn’t even throw a strop before leaving, noob.

spring naked and full of the joys into the wonderful waters of sillytrackworld

If you feel something brush against your leg, it’s just TJ or Elf…

Get out while you can! 😆

Howdy 🙂

Hello! What do you ride and where?

Since joining STW I have managed to achieve far less when at the computer and have spent too much in the classifieds. It’s more of a singletrackvillage.

Yep, Looks like he’s gone. As you were.

😆
Shane* … Shane… Come back Shane
(*Luke)

Wow 33 posts, I wasn’t expecting that.

Thanks for the tips and the warm welcome 🙂

If you think your bike looks good, it does.

If you like the way your bike rides, it’s an awesome bike.

You don’t need to spend a million dollars to have a great bike, but if you do spend a million dollars and know what you want you’ll probably also have a great bike.

Yes, you can tour on your bike – whatever it is.

Yes, you can race on your bike – whatever it is.

Yes, you can commute on your bike – whatever it is.

26” wheels or 29” or 650b or 700c or 24” or 20” or whatever – yes, that wheel size is rad and you’ll probably get where you’re going.

Disc brakes, cantis, v-brakes, and road calipers all do a great job of stopping a bike when they’re working and adjusted.

No paint job makes everyone happy.

Yes, you can put a rack on that. Get some p-clamps if there are no mounts.

Steel is a great material for making bike frames – so is aluminum, carbon fiber, and titanium.

You can have your saddle at whatever angle makes you happy.

Your handlebars can be lower than your saddle, even with your saddle, or higher than your saddle. Whichever way you like it is right.

Being shuttled up a downhill run does not make you a weak person, nor does choosing not to fly off of a 10 foot drop.

Bike frames made overseas can be super cool. Bike frames made in the USA can be super cool.

Hey, tattooed and pierced long shorts wearin flat brim hat red bull drinkin white Oakley sportin rad person on your full suspension big hit bike – nice work out there.

Hey, little round glasses pocket protector collared shirt skid lid rear view mirror sandal wearing schwalbe marathon running pletscher two-leg kickstand tourist – good job.

Hey, shaved leg skinny as hell super duper tan line hear rate monitor checking power tap train in the basement all winter super loud lycra kit million dollar wheels racer – keep it up.

The more you ride your bike, the less your ass will hurt.

The following short answers are good answers, but not the only ones for the question asked – 29”, Brooks, lugged, disc brake, steel, Campagnolo, helmet, custom, Rohloff, NJS, carbon, 31.8, clipless, porteur.

No bike does everything perfectly. In fact, no bike does anything until someone gets on it to ride.

Sometimes, recumbent bikes are ok.

Your bikeshop is not trying to screw you. They’re trying to stay open.

Buying things off of the internet is great, except when it sucks.

Some people know more about bikes than you do. Other people know less.

Maybe the person you waved at while you were out riding didn’t see you wave at them.

It sucks to be harassed by assholes in cars while you’re on a bike. It also sucks to drive behind assholes on bikes.

Did you build that yourself? Awesome. Did you buy that? Cool.

Wheelies are the best trick ever invented. That’s just a fact.

Which is better, riding long miles, or hanging out under a bridge doing tricks? Yes.

Yes, you can break your collar bone riding a bike like that.

Stopping at stop signs is probably a good idea.

Driving with your bikes on top of your car to get to a dirt trail isn’t ideal, but for most people it’s necessary.

If your bike has couplers, or if you have a spendy bike case, or if you pay a shop to pack your bike, or if you have a folding bike, shipping a bike is still a pain in the ass for everyone involved.

That dent in your frame is probably ok, but maybe it’s not. You should get it looked at.

Touch up paint always looks like shit. Often it looks worse than the scratch.

A pristine bike free of dirt, scratches, and wear marks makes me sort of sad.

A bike that’s been chained to the same tree for three years caked with rust and missing parts makes me sad too.

Bikes purchased at Wal-mart, Target, Costco, or K-mart are generally not the best bang for your buck.

Toe overlap is not the end of the world, unless you crash and die – then it is.

Sometimes parts break. Sometimes you crash. Sometimes it’s your fault.

Yes, you can buy a bike without riding it first. It would be nice to ride it first, but it’s not a deal breaker not to.

Ownership of a truing stand does not a wheel builder make.

32 spokes, 48 spokes, 24 spokes, three spokes? Sure.

Single speed bikes are rad. Bikes with derailleurs and cassettes are sexy. Belt drive internal gear bikes work great too.

Columbus, TruTemper, Reynolds, Ishiwata, or no brand? I’d ride it.

Tubeless tires are pretty cool. So are tubes.

The moral of RAGBRAI is that families and drunken boobs can have fun on the same route, just maybe at different times of day.

Riding by yourself kicks ass. You might also try riding with a group.

Really fast people are frustrating, but they make you faster. When you get faster, you might frustrate someone else.

Stopping can be as much fun as riding.

Lots of people worked their asses off to build whatever you’re riding on. You should thank them.

Octopi?

Not much left to discuss on here then Rorschach 😆

Damn it! We failed!

🙂

too much seatpost.

would have been faster on 100 mm hardtail.

& hello 🙂

Rorsch, that was a bit of a Surly response doncha think?