Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 54 total)
  • Guy in the office hates cycling and I’ve just drawn him for secret santa
  • Premier Icon andybrad
    Subscriber

    Guy in the office hates cycling and I’ve just drawn him for secret santa

    Any suggestions as to what I should get him? I’m thinking of bib shorts:)

    hodgynd
    Member

    A mini pump ..to keep all the hot air he spouts topped up ..

    Premier Icon Harry_the_Spider
    Subscriber

    A turd in a Tupperware box.

    Skills course

    Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    Premier Icon scaredypants
    Subscriber

    hates cycling or hates cyclists ?

    if he hates cycling, get him something nice to do with something else
    if he hates cyclists, there’s a whole variety of tupperware boxes available, so go with Harry

    Premier Icon Caher
    Subscriber

    New forum username for him.

    darthpunk
    Member

    If he hates cycling, buy him a gift relating to something he does like. It is possible that not everyone likes your hobby

    The word ‘hate’ is nearly always over-used/misused IMO. A globally-adopted USA-ism that by now could surely be defined as anything from ‘mild dislike’ to ‘snarling, spitting, careering repugnance’. Usually the former.

    Also need to know whether definitely ‘cycling’ or ‘cyclists’*

    In most all situations (excepting a requirement to physically disarm or neutralise) I find that kindness wins.

    ie if he ‘hates’ a thoughtful gift from a ‘cyclist’, then pfffft, you still did a nice thing. If OTOH he likes it, then you still did a nice thing.

    *For purpose of safety-awareness if sharing road-space on cycle-commute.

    Premier Icon funkmasterp
    Subscriber

    What does he like? I think football is a shite game, but if I had to buy a gift for someone that likes it, o would get them something football related.

    Premier Icon frogstomp
    Subscriber

    A tax disc holder

    Premier Icon mulacs
    Subscriber

    Highway Code?

    A 26″x2.4″ inner tube with Schrader valve.

    Premier Icon DezB
    Subscriber

    As mentioned there’s an important distinction between cycling and cylists.
    Turd in a box if it’s cyclists.

    Rob Hilton
    Member

    The word ‘hate’ is nearly always over-used/misused IMO.

    I literally hate people who say this 🙂

    Premier Icon ads678
    Subscriber

    If he hates cyclists, buy him a mug of the main rival of the football team he supports.

    If he just hates cycling buy him some normal secret Santa random shit, like Anne Summers slide and ride lube.

    Premier Icon NYC101009
    Subscriber

    Gimp Mask & Lube & Job Done

    Premier Icon andybrad
    Subscriber

    He jokes about knocking cyclists off on a regular basis. While this is office banter it’s also a good opportunity to get him something appropriate.

    Premier Icon fatoldgit
    Subscriber

    Something you know is cycling related but he won’t
    Such as Planet X merino Socks
    https://www.planetx.co.uk/c/q/clothing/footwear/socks
    He will like em and you can nod knowingly

    chevychase
    Member

    Copy of the highway code then.

    Premier Icon strangey13
    Subscriber

    Bad taxidermy

    A premium subscription to the Singletrack Chat Forum. There’s little chance of him encountering any cyclists or bike related content there.

    Premier Icon ads678
    Subscriber

    In that case buy him a chain or some brake pads.

    Or some random cycling route book.

    joshvegas
    Member

    He jokes about knocking cyclists off on a regular basis

    Splash fake blood over his car a smash his windscreen sprinkle some crushed helmet about. Take a photo. Make it a card with “cyclists are dicks I hate them with careering repugnance. Lol” put card in envelope for secret santa to dish out.

    joshvegas
    Member

    Actually scrap that.

    That is not workplace banter. Book him a one to one with his line manager to deal with your formal complaint.

    brownsauce
    Member

    Even if said workmate was an avid cyclist + great guy i’d still go the turd in box route

    anyways , i thought secret santa was an american thing for mainly women office workers ?

    sounds a bit queer for british blokes.to be doing it

    cold buffet spread , cheap warm booze and a punch up with the supervisior seems the proper way of celebrating xmas in the workplace.

    wrightyson
    Member

    Bpw voucher.

    Premier Icon lister
    Subscriber

    Make a donation to a cycling charity in his name. Be sure to include all his contact details.

    Premier Icon MoreCashThanDash
    Subscriber

    Velodrome taster session

    arrpee
    Member

    Draw a picture of him being bummed by a cyclist over the bonnet of his car.

    Frame it.

    Merry Christmas.

    Premier Icon andybrad
    Subscriber

    I’d be happy to pay for a picture like that if we have any budding artists on here 🙂

    Premier Icon cookeaa
    Subscriber

    I would just test his general sense of humour/ability to laugh at himself in gift form…

    Traffic Jam Sound Book

    Almost any partridge related gift

    A book to prompt some introspection

    Premier Icon DezB
    Subscriber

    I’d be happy to pay for a picture like that if we have any budding artists on here

    Got a link to his Facebook/Linkedin…?

    Premier Icon DezB
    Subscriber

    sounds a bit queer

    Welcome to the 1970s

    Make a donation to a cycling charity in his name. Be sure to include all his contact details.

    Just this.

    Definitely gift to cycle charity in his name. One that promotes cycling in some way, Sustrans maybe. And for sure his the details, they’ll be contacting him for ever. The gift that keeps on giving 🙂

    BTW, he sounds like a git.

    APF

    whitestone
    Member

    A t-shirt with “I broke rule #1” on the front.

    mrb123
    Member

    Chamois cream

    Premier Icon DickBarton
    Subscriber

    Chamois Cream

    Haha, looks like I’m too slow with the best suggestion ever!

    Buttplug.

    Rubbed with a hot chilli, just in case he tries it.

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