Just picked my son up from after school club. He’s almost 8. He was a bit upset about having been told off for not bowing his head to pray, sorry what I said. “We had to pray in class and I didnt want to as I dont believe in God and I got told off for not bowing my head.”

I have told him next time just do it and think about something else.

However I’m raging, this isnt a religious school how dare this person impose their views and values on my son….if I visit the school to express my views I dont see it ending well…Will talk to my partner tonight when she gets home and ask her to talk to school. She does drop off and I struggle to get there to speak to people as I’m a teacher myself…

Am I over reacting? Help me count to ten before I compose the head a strongly worded email!!!! 😉

It’s stuff like this that makes me glad I don’t have kids.

Have you really got that little going on in your life that this is worth getting so wound up about?

Not overreacting, no*.  It’s decades since I was at school, but had the same situation.  My parents wrote a letter and I (and others) were excused from assemblies.

Why were they praying in class though?  What class was it?

It’s stuff like this that makes me glad I don’t have kids.

You don’t have to have kids to understand what a non-religious school is.

*cue a 10-page thread however…

Am I over reacting?

A bit.

He’s seven and seven year olds are easily upset about lots of unimportant things.

You’re not seven.  You should have a wider perspective on life.

Explain to him that it’s perfectly Ok not to believe in God and not to pray if he doesn’t want to but that perhaps it’s the right thing to do to bow his head and remain quiet as a gesture of respect towards those people who do want to do it.

My parents wrote a letter and I (and others) were excused from assemblies.

It wasnt even in an assembly.

Have you really got that little going on in your life that this is worth getting so wound up about?

Obviously not as little as you, bothering to post that!!

I’m with you op. I hate the fact that our daughters supposed non religious school is closely associated with the local church and that Christianity is essentially forced on those that attend (or they have to sit things out, very inclusive!). I happy for her to learn about all religions and make her own choice in time but not for one to be forced on her by those that choose to believe.

Well, come on. How middle class helicopter parent can you get?

Explain to him that it’s perfectly Ok not to believe in God and not to pray if he doesn’t want to but that perhaps it’s the right thing to do to bow his head and remain quiet as a gesture of respect towards those people who do want to do it.

I did that, however I really really dont agree with him having too do it. Also he wasnt doung anything other than not praying as long as he doesnt pray quietly I think the teacher should/could over look it….

I do and it boils my piss that they are expected to do this sort of thing even when its not a “faith” school.

Looked at removing them from the religious studies lessons but then that came with the risk of them “being different”, etc.

In the end neither cared for any of it BUT in secondary its more a philosophical version now rather than the bible bashing bollocks it was in the 80’s.

Still not the point though. I’d be “mentioning it” the next time I was in school not too subtly…..

Well, come on. How middle class helicopter parent can you get?

Not sure what that means, but you crack on with posting, its keeping you off the streets.

I do and it boils my piss that they are expected to do this sort of thing even when its not a “faith” school.

I didn’t attend a “football” school and really don’t believe in football.

I was still forced to participate in it though, much much more than I was ever made to take part in religious activities.

You have the legs for shorts though Perchy – the PE teacher just liked to look at you sooooo much…

That’s true.

Legs like Wiggins, body like Biggins.

Perhaps it was a pe class and tbey were praying that we may one day win the football world cup….

What about if you or your son went to a wedding in a church, or a funeral? Would you bow your head even though you dont believe, out of respect for others and that’s it’s just the done thing, or both keep your heads up looking round at all the others.

What is a helicopter parent. Is that better than a range rover parent?

I’m in 100% agreement OP. My daughter’s junior school does this sort of thing. It’s not a faith school.  I think learning about all faiths and religions is very important but forced worship shouldn’t have a place in modern education.

It’s also interesting how a non faith school with a multi cultural intake only worships one religion during assembly etc…

It’s the hyperbole in evidence that amuses me so much. “Raging”, “how dare they” etc… as if they have forced him to recant his previous faith & swear to a new one.

I would sympathise more if you thought it was a Catholic school and they’d started teaching COE doctrine, or a Muslim school and they wanted to circumcise him.

It is also, if I’m honest, quite amusing to see how indignant as well as righteous the sort of people who post such material as the OP get when they feel their views are being slighted. X

What about if you or your son went to a wedding in a church, or a funeral? Would you bow your head even though you dont believe, out of respect for others and that’s it’s just the done thing, or both keep your heads up looking round at all the others.

The difference being in one situation you have actively entered a place of worship and the other is a place of education.

I don’t think your son should bow his head.  I also think the teacher should show some respect for your sons beliefs rather than the other way around. It is the teacher who needs to do the learning here

Am I over reacting?

Well, your child is a seven year old, and they were “A bit upset”

You are an adult, and you are “raging”  apparently

So. I’m going to go with Yes. Overreacting. 👍

I would be raging too.  I’d be at the school tomorrow having a quiet word with the head.  My wife would have the “it’s not the biggest problem in the world attitude” but religious indoctrination of any flavour pretty much IS the biggest problem in the world!  Unfortunately you’ll be up against teachers who have mattbee’s attitude.  If you want to go armed get a copy of the school’s policy on religious instruction/worship (even non faith schools are required by the government to do some) then either point out its set in the 1970s (everyone agrees unless they tell us otherwise*) or they’ve been ignoring it.

* or are a bit brown, or wear a headdress in which case we’ll guess they are different.

Also, if the kid doesn’t play the game and bow his head, the ickle  Baby Jeebus won’t bring him any Christmas presents.

OMG!

What about if you or your son went to a wedding in a church, or a funeral? Would you bow your head even though you dont believe, out of respect for others and that’s it’s just the done thing, or both keep your heads up looking round at all the others.

I tend to look around the building and just stay quiet. You say respect, I say pretending. I’m a bit too grown up for playing pretend. I’d have a word with the school myself and just say my son doesn’t believe in God, therefore he won’t be bowing his head / pretending to pray. I’d appreciate if you’d respect that.

http://www.27bslash6.com/easter.html

I tend to look around the building and just stay quiet.

That can come across as a bit creepy though.

nothing makes you feel more uncomfortable when you’re trying to get your pray on than some joker eyeballing you from across the room.

Intruding on a moment of private contemplation innit.

I didn’t attend a “football” school and really don’t believe in football.

I was still forced to participate in it though, much much more than I was ever made to take part in religious activities.

In Lanarkshire?

What’s the difference?

What is a helicopter parent

One that’s perpetually hovering, I expect.

In Lanarkshire?

What’s the difference?

Motherwell supporters don’t count.

Part time Proddies.

Would you bow your head even though you dont believe, out of respect for others and that’s it’s just the done thing, or both keep your heads up looking round at all the others.

Last time I was in a church for a wedding I didnt bow my head. I always think it shows more respect as I dont pretend, maybe I should as a few Christians what they think.

Also, if the kid doesn’t play the game and bow his head, the ickle  Baby Jeebus won’t bring him any Christmas presents.

Jesus, I thought it was Santa?

How can a seven year old make an informed decision over the Big Questions?

I can only assume he is being indoctrinated at home as an atheist, so why not expose him to the other side once in a while?

What is a helicopter parent

One that’s perpetually hovering, I expect.

Is that on a treadmill or not?

talk me down

Stop being a big Jessie FFS! No wonder your child was upset, must have learned how to over react from you.

I can only assume he is being indoctrinated at home as an atheist, so why not expose him to the other side once in a while?

He has, but I’m his parent I’m allowed too. He’s also allowed to like gays and hasnt had part of his cock chopped off.

Jesus, I thought it was Santa?

Not called Santamas is it?

If you’re going to have a conviction, at least do it with a bit of conviction.

Bin off Christmas for the kiddies if they choose not to believe

maybe I should as a few Christians what they think.

Maybe you already have, but just didn’t like their answers

Overreacting a bit, but, assuming your kid is telling the whole story, the teacher should not be forcing this?  Are you completely sure he wasn’t making a fuss about being asked to do it, thus provoking the telling off?  Completely forgivable from a 7 year old of course, who is probably following your lead (based on your reaction)?

Another way to think about this is to ask the question why does your Son not believe in God?  Because you’ve taught him not to, of course.  At his age, he hasn’t decided this himself.  Perhaps it would do him good to have some experience of other views, so he can form a more balanced opinion, and make up his own mind some day.

Okay seriously, as above could you not just advise him to bow his head discretely as a mark of respect to other peoples beliefs?  Assure him that doing so does not make him believe in God.

Disclaimer:  I’m atheist, but capable of ignoring religion.

I tend to look around the building and just stay quiet.

That can come across as a bit creepy though.

nothing makes you feel more uncomfortable when you’re trying to get your pray on than

Supposed to be creepy. I’m testing the strength of your faith innit. Seeing if I can put you off your prayer A game.

nothing makes you feel more uncomfortable when you’re trying to get your pray on than some joker eyeballing you from across the room.

How would you know unless you didn’t have your eyes closed?  Heretic.

How would you know unless you didn’t have your eyes closed?

God grasses them up.

Perhaps you are over reacting a little bit, maybe teach your son that he can decide what he wants to believe, but it’s nice not to piss on others beliefs, I suppose it’s about respect really.

For example, i have friends who believe that dead family members are watching over them,  I don’t believe any of it is true, but i never give my opinion, because i wouldn’t want someone else pissing over my beliefs.

Respect is nice to give, as well as receive.