- Give me your stories of finding love
globalti – Member
The greatest irony of all is that, as most married people will agree, once you’re married and have a bit of maturity and self-confidence you are quite happy to waltz up to just about anybody and start chatting. If the worst happened to Mrs Gti I don’t think I’d have any trouble in finding somebody else once I was ready for it. There is however the danger of ending up with some nutter, as a cycling pal of mine discovered when he started dating a woman he met through Fitness Singles.
Whilst I agree, I really couldnt be arsed to go through it all again. I’d happily live as a batchelor surrounded by gadgets and bikes, hoping to lazily establish a friend with benefits.Posted 3 years agomakecoldplayhistorySubscriber
I’m besotted with my wife. She can be a complete dick on occasion but so I can and I can’t imagine my life without her. We’re very different in some ways in a yaing/yang type where we compliment each other. We share a sense of humour and that’s the most important thing.
We met fairly young (I was married at 24). I’d only had one (maybe 2, it depends on the definition) meaningful relationship before that. I went home to my student house after our first kiss and told my housemates I was going to marry her one day.
once you’re married and have a bit of maturity and self-confidence you are quite happy to waltz up to just about anybody and start chatting.
I couldn’t agree with this more. I’ve never even really flirted let alone anything worse since meeting my wife. I’ve thought on several occasions though that women were much harder to talk to when I was single.Posted 3 years agotomhowardSubscriber
I didn’t know it at the time, but the best thing I did for my love life was go see Jedi at uk bike skills….
To elaborate, he adds customers on as a friend on FB after the event to share your ride photos and videos etc. I was perusing tinder one day and got a match with a young lady, we went on a few dates, one thing led to a lot of other things and we’ve been together just short of a year. How this relates to Jedi is that she had also been on a skills day, so we had a mutual friend, (tinder takes a bit of info from your FB account, if you let it) meaning she thought that if Jedi was mates with me, I can’t be all bad, so she swiped right.
So err, go on a skills day?Posted 3 years agoMister PMember
I’d happily live as a batchelor surrounded by gadgets and bikes, hoping to lazily establish a friend with benefits.
You’ve described my life there. I thought I’d got the FWB sorted but she thought we were more than that and it got a bit messy so it’s bikes only for a while until that all blows over.Posted 3 years agoMTB-IdleMember
I’m way out of dating practice but I was sent this the other day by way of warning of the dangers of dating.
Who thinks Chad is a hero?Posted 3 years agonickcSubscriber
recently did the on line thing, and signed up to Guardian Soulmates and Match…
so, Match.com…spent an evening writing messages and notes and firing them off…no replies, not a jot! 😆 I think my error was to have my search to narrow, so I re-did it this time, looking at women who didn’t necessarily breathe air, or have any pulse…so creatures of the un-dead basically, and repeated the process, got some replies this time, One was a picture…was has been seen cannot be unseen…it was tricky to work out where the sofa ended and the “woman” (and I’m using the term loosely) began, and the other was a green ink (literally) email telling me that “All Men Are Bastards”…I think she may have been stood up, made to pay for her own tea? who knows?
Guardian Soulmates – at least they could string a sentence together! and unbelievably, met a Canadian! from Vancouver! lucky lucky
It does happen, but only if you want it to, and take action about it!Posted 3 years agorOcKeTdOgSubscriber
My old life ran from 18 to 38, since then I’ve dabbled like a kid left in a sweet shop trying all the flavours.but then got bored and took things a bit more seriously, met my current GF at age 40 & have never been happier. Infact i didn’t know what happy was until i met her, as gushy as that sounds.
Yes, there is hope. Just don’t take it too seriously, join night school or groups to find like minded people and let things happen naturally. It’ll never happen if you sit at home feeling sorry for yourself
Best of luckPosted 3 years agoPrinceJohnMember
Cheers all, I’m forty in march, so with no kids it feels like life has slipped through my fingers a little bit. Not helped by half my friends on Facebook posting how great it feels to be surrounded by their significant others and not being out and about. All I wanted was to be spending Nye in with the ex and her little boy, not out in the pub to stop me going crazy at home.Posted 3 years agojambalayaMember
First met my wonderful wife as colleagues/friends when 45 stayed in touch as she was in NY and me in Singapore, arranged to meet again in 2012 and started dating. Married in 2015 (52yo) and have never ever been happier (married before and 3 great kids).
EDIT: there are lots of single people of all ages, some never married or with long term partners others who have moved on from earlier relationships. Good mate moved in with a girl for the first time ever at 52, he’s getting married this year. She’s a little younger but similar story, never lived with anyone before.
40 is fine, you’re able to meet someone from 30-45 ?Posted 3 years agobarkmMember
concur with a lot said here.
Being a normal bloke gets you a very long way. I was on plenty of fish and didn’t really initiate any chats and was able to be pretty choosy. But it’s same other way, finding a reasonably sane woman who hasn’t been totally destroyed by a soulless marriage/**** is a task post-40.
But at 44 I’ve discovered absolute happiness I never knew existed with the most humble, kind, caring, intelligent, talented, considerate, person I’ve ever met. It’s like we share the same mind, I’m blown away by it.Posted 3 years ago
I also think ‘most’ people settle. I did, I thought ‘is this it?’ a life of drudgery in a joyless marriage because that’s the life as decreed and designed by the society I was born into. Turns out I was very wrong.
But I know many others in that situation.badllamaMember
Ok I’ve just gone through this. I’m 45.
Met on POF after 1 or 2 dates with other people, previous relation ship was 19 years.
She is 44, 2 kids one 21 and one 3 and the last 2 months has been fooking brilliant, she is very chilled we love the same music, camping, outdoors stuff, I always wanted to be a dad now I’ve the cutest 3 year old to spoil rotten, get on well with the 21 year old also, although she has her own life bf etc.. not at home at weekends.
I swear I cannot remember the last time I was so happy.
And we just get on! we both put cards on the table from word go so we both knew what each other wanted and its working very well indeed!Posted 3 years ago
I think at this age no one wants the bullshit so if you both honest and up front things go very well.MoreCashThanDashSubscriber
One of my wife’s school friends is getting married this year. She’s 46. He’s 28 years older. Met through a mutual interest in music a couple of years ago, moved in together last year. First cohabiting relationship for both of them.
They are a lovely couple, well suited to each other. Though the devil in me would like to ask her what first attracted her to the millionaire philanthropist a la Mrs Merton.Posted 3 years agoAmbroseSubscriber
My mother’s story.
She was born in Jamaica during the ‘good times’ prior to WW2. She had an incredibly privileged upbringing and met my father in her late teens/ very early twenties whilst she was moving in the very privileged circle; she talked of the Kennedys and others whom I only knew by Christian names but now, years later I understand that they really were movers and shakers. Politicians, filmstars, sportsmen (my ‘god brother’ is on telly even as we speak, he broke a special record in Oxford at the Iffley Rd track in 1953). One day, possibly whilst swimming in Kingston Harbour she met a nice young man. She an Establishment landowner’s daughter, he a doctor’s son. Time passed and eventually, lo and behold I was born in Jamaica. Three years later in the UK, my brother arrived too. Everything seemed well and good.Posted 3 years ago
My father had returned to the UK with his job and eventually the rest of the family followed. But then he met somebody else. Understandably my mother was devastated. She went around to visit ‘the other woman’ but she was not home. However her husband was, so they talked.
As months went by my mother and he realised that they were more than fond of each other and they eventually married. They were totally and wholly besotted with each other. She was a divorcee, one who on paper at least was the wrong doer (having been persuaded that it would be best to admit some non-existent fault), whilst he was a very talented industrial chemist.
And what a guy he was. Immensely intelligent, massively knowledgeable and just so understanding. So obviously I rebelled against him and resented him because he wasn’t my real dad, even though my father did very little for me at all. I was horrid towards him.
He and my mother had a daughter, my sister. And then our fantastically, wonderful life fell to pieces when he developed a brain tumour. He lost his job (does anyone here remember the horrors at ‘Summerland’ on the Isle of Man? After the disaster he became MD at the plastics company that was involved). My mother nursed him to the end. It wasn’t at all nice and to this day I love, respect and admire the way she managed to deal with a dying husband, three horrible children and run a village shop and Post Office, all at the same time. She did all of them pretty blummin well too.
Sometime after his death, once I had grown up a bit and started to realise just what he had done for me (loved, raised and educated me for a start) my mother decided to commission a commemorative prize in his name, to be given to the best younger science pupil in the school that I work in.
When she died her three children scattered her ashes with his in Little Marlow churchyard. And then we had a drink to them.
Sonia and Martin Dawson loved each other so much. Nowadays I recognise just how deep this love was. I’m a lucky bloke.darrellMember
I was 40 when I met my MissusPosted 3 years ago
She’s was 30 at the time and is Norwegian and we met in a bar in Zurich (where I was living at the time and she was visiting for a weekend break)
She checked my teeth, kicked my legs and made sure everything seemed to be working and that was that. 12 months later I had moved to Norway. That was 10 yr ago and am still herewillardMember
Even rarer after you hit 60. I’m past caring now, I’ve been on my own for far too long really.
The same thing happened to my dad…
He and my mum got divorced when I was 18 (so about 24 years ago) and, apart from a couple of GFs early on, he spent most of the time on his own working. I think he just enjoyed being on his own towards the end and, in some ways, didn’t really want to put another woman through having to share his life when his back got fused and he developed cancer.
I’m not sure how much he wanted to be on his own, but he seemed comfortable with his choice.Posted 3 years agoDezBSubscriber
Are there oldies on tinder? I’d always assumed it was for young-uns.
There are a fair few using it as a ‘normal’ dating app.
Can’t see me living with anybody else again. Seems to be the best way to get to despise someone, or just get bored with them. Financially it makes sense, of course, but for sanity’s sake I’ll probably live alone until I’m a gonner.Posted 3 years ago
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