Viewing 30 posts - 1 through 30 (of 30 total)
  • give me your inuendo's!
  • odannyboy
    Free Member

    long story but im texting someone to arrange to go out.the conversation is being had in the third person with a kind of spy/ bond type theme. odd i know but run with me! im running out of flirtatios inuendos, help me out…were talking concealed weapon, booby traps, lying low etc etc.
    ive run out know tho..any ideas?

    hels
    Free Member

    Buy a copy of Viz magazine ?

    gravitysucks
    Free Member

    I take it you’ve already used the words Pussy Galore

    Junkyard
    Free Member

    tell me you have asked abut her secret cave 😯
    Surely she has a pussy to stroke or are you the villan?

    cynic-al
    Full Member

    My wife asked me for an innuendo. I gave her one.

    BruceWee
    Full Member

    Inyourendo!

    woody2000
    Full Member

    Mention that you’d like to attempt re-entry later (Moonraker innuendo)

    Juicy_plum
    Free Member

    odannyboy, what gift did you decide upon for your “bird”?

    wwaswas
    Full Member

    Are we going to get your whole relationship posted on here? Yesterday we had presents and today it’s innuendo.

    Maybe if you could just point her at stw she could dispense with your involvement altogether 😉

    takisawa2
    Full Member

    Ask her if you can take her up the Nile ?

    I think I embarrassed the lady at Islabikes on Saturday, when she suggested that a some children prefer to mount from the rear.
    With wobbling-head-tongue-in-cheek gesture, I mentioned that I also prefer this approach. It did not go down as expected.

    psychle
    Free Member

    obviously you’ve mentioned you’re gold member/finger, right? 🙂

    philconsequence
    Free Member

    asked her to ride down your exploding pipe-line?

    mrsgrips
    Free Member

    taking her on a ‘fast ride’

    plain old ‘undercover(s)’ innuendo is simple too insert 😉 whenever

    maybe substituting gold paint for chocolate?

    depends on the conversation really 🙂 I love innuendo. Nothing like a good flirt to encourage more interesting ‘fun.’

    hels
    Free Member

    Not quite related but my workmate just came up with a good one.

    “a guy from Taxidermy came in while you were at lunch – I told him to get stuffed”

    Took me a while…

    (and yes we do have a Taxidermy department)

    philconsequence
    Free Member

    call her miss moneypenny and reassure her that despite wanting you, the most you’ll do is flirt and make her do your filing.

    this will make her want you.

    gravitysucks
    Free Member

    Hels what sort of freaky ass company do you work for that has its own taxidermy department?!

    philconsequence
    Free Member

    claims direct?

    PJM1974
    Free Member

    *insert anecdote about approaching PR girl on Cove stand at bike show with a view to obtaining a Hand Job here*

    Pook
    Full Member

    Roger more.

    flip
    Free Member

    From: Tomorrow Never Dies

    James Bond: [Whilst being in bed with his Scandinavian language tutor ] I always enjoyed learning a new tongue.

    Moneypenny: You always were a cunning linguist, James. 😉

    The best sex pun was actually delivered by Q in Moonraker.
    Sir Frederick Gray: My God, what’s Bond doing?

    Q: I think he’s attempting re-entry, sir.

    Pook
    Full Member

    flip, I believe it was his language teacher who responded to his ‘new tongue’ quip, not Miss Moneypenny.

    BigButSlimmerBloke
    Free Member

    Have you considered taking her up the Oxo Tower?

    hels
    Free Member

    Gravity sucks – not an undertakers ! I work in a rather large Museum. It is quite freaky arse.

    TheSouthernYeti
    Free Member

    Your missile is primed and ready to go off?

    Gee-Jay
    Free Member

    Innuendos are great, I always try to slip one in when I can

    odannyboy
    Free Member

    Juicy-plum..flowers.safe bet, and went down a treat,not to much not to little.
    anyhow this is a different lady..
    anyway,keep em coming these are good!

    willard
    Full Member

    Inuendos? Sorry, but there is no way I am giving you one.

    davidrussell
    Free Member

    how about asking her to report in voluntarily so you can check out her particulars and make sure she’s fit for a mission.

    or just ask her if you can bash the back doors in. it sounds enough like a code…

    IA
    Full Member

    My fav bond line(s) has gotta be:

    “my names Plenty”
    bond looks her up and down “why, of course you are”
    “plenty o’toole”
    “named after your father perhaps?”

    backhander
    Free Member

    Tell her you need assistance polishing your weapon. Saliva works well.
    Or just tell her you’re going to do her up the wrong ‘un.

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