Found my teenage son’s stash. What to do now?

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  • Found my teenage son’s stash. What to do now?
  • So Mrs Stern found a little plastic bag lying on the staircase filled with skunk. It would appear to be from our 17yo son. I confronted him about it and he admitted that he had bought from a friend of a friend. I asked him why and said the usual reason…all my friends are doing it and I warned him about the dangers of smoking and toking once again  and told him I was disappointed in him. I also confiscated his stash.

    So what to do now? Do I give it him back? As I’m pretty sure he’ll just waste another 30 euros buying some more. Do I destroy it in front of his face? But that would just mean he would resent me and it seems a bit pointless. Mrs Stern is up for re-visiting our early years and making it into cookies! 😱

    On the one hand I want to be a responsible parent but on the other side when I was his age I was well into the whole head scene myself and I would feel a total hypocrite playing the irate father. Would would the STW massive do?🤔

    Premier Icon funkmasterp
    Subscriber

    I’d take Mrs Sterns advice or set up a bucket bong when your son is out. Relive that misspent youth!

    mooman
    Member

    Explain your concerns and past experience of it to him – allow him to decide .. and keep your fingers crossed.

    sbob
    Member

    Make the cookies, don’t tell the son about the added ingredients.

    Premier Icon mikewsmith
    Subscriber

    So what to do now? Do I give it him back? As I’m pretty sure he’ll just waste another 30 euros buying some more. Do I destroy it in front of his face? But that would just mean he would resent me and it seems a bit pointless. Mrs Stern is up for re-visiting our early years and making it into cookies!

    Smoke it in front of him, let him see what his parents look like stoned, should put him off 😉

    ready
    Member

    Smoke it with him? Nothing will make it super uncool quicker than getting high with your parents!

    Lock him in the cupboard under the stairs and don’t let him out ’til he’s smoked it all. That’ll teach him.

    Premier Icon Teetosugars
    Subscriber

    and told him I was disappointed in him

    Why the disappointment? FFS He’s smoking weed, he’s not a Trump Supporter.

    It’s  a rite of passage that most take. Doesn’t make you a bad person..

    I like your thinking mikewsmith! Nothing more uncool than seeing your dad throwing a whitey! 😄

    Why the disappointment? FFS He’s smoking weed, he’s not a Trump Supporter.

    TBH because he was careless enough to let his mother find it.

    tjagain
    Member

    Tell him the truth.  I can’t stand all the hypocrisy around drugs from all sides

    If you don’t want him smoking it now then you need to explain why.  will he know you used to smoke?

    No doubt sitting around getting stoned all day is a really bad thing to do especially as a teenager.  Makes people boring apart from anything else  😉

    Premier Icon Sandwich
    Subscriber

    Having had to counsel my boss when his son was sectioned after smoking skunk you might want to set fire to it without inhaling the smoke.

    doris5000
    Member

    hmm.  i’d be a bit concerned simply because (in the UK at least) weed is just so much stronger than it used to be, even 10 or 15 years ago, and 17 is fairly young

    I’d probably not give it back (tell him not to be such an plonker in future), but sit down and have a chat, explain risks, use some of your experience – don’t read him the riot act but get him to educate himself. I know plenty of people who got themselves into a serious mess with weed, and i’m sure you do too!

    Also find out how much he’s toking. I knew people who smoked 24/7 at that age because it was ‘rebellious’ and ‘cool’ – like 8am on the way to college – which is dodgy ground IMO.  If it’s just friday night round at a friend’s house I’d be a lot more comfortable with it

    Gunz
    Member

    As TJ said but a warning/chat about the strength of the heaviest stuff may be useful.  It’s nuclear grade compared to what us olds used to smoke and I believe this is the reason it’s linked to more mental health problems nowadays.

    yunki
    Member

    there really is only one human response to this situation.

    smoke it with him.

    it will instantly become an infinitely less cool activity, and you will have bonded with him on a level that at present, he can only experience with people outside of the family.

    you might make a prat of yourself, but at least it will be a laugh and his smoking mates will respect you (and by association, him) for being ‘down’, leaving you in a great position to offer advice about the dangers of excess.

    otherwise he’s just gonna be out rebelling against his square parents, smoking super skunk with only his muggy mates for support.

    tjagain
    Member

    wise words Yunki

    Premier Icon Northwind
    Subscriber

    When you say skunk, do you mean in the old school sense (ie actual skunk) or do you mean modern skunk (ie high thc, low cbd?)  I think it could call for a bit of a different response- though tbh these days the strong stuff is easier to buy than the good stuff.

    Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    Party at Roter’s house everyone.

    A member of my family has been in and out of mental health institutes for the last 20 years.

    The family has always pointed the finger at the skunk he smoked.

    Maybe he would have had those problems anyway. Maybe he wouldn’t.

    Watching his troubles put me right off the idea of smoking anything

    Premier Icon northernsoul
    Subscriber

    My dad had ‘the chat’ with me… did it make a difference? Did it f*** 🖖

    myti
    Member

    I had my 1st ever joint age about 16 at a party with my mum. I noticed some friends of hers smoking it and I asked her if I could get a go as I was interested to see what it felt like. We talked about it and her only concern was the tobacco aspect and that I might get hooked on cigarettes as she had once been a fag smoker. So she asked her friend to roll a pretty pure one and I just had a couple of little puffs and felt great. Had she said no I would have gone underground with it and done it anyway with school friends but because of her attitude I feel I can share most things with her. I went through the uni weed phase and now 20 years on don’t touch the stuff and never smoked cigarettes.

    Don’t be a hypocrite. Just sit down and voice any concerns you have about it and don’t make it a rebellious thing.

    dirk_pumpa
    Member

    Popping a whitey infront of him is the best suggestion ive seen so far.

    Fingers crossed its the same shit northwind has been smoking.. 🙈

    mikey74
    Member

    How about just having an open and Frank discussion about it with him? It doesn’t have to be awkward like the sex talk, just tell him your experiences and concerns.

    There’s no need to be a grumpy old dad about it.

    Premier Icon Cougar
    Subscriber

    I don’t know much about drugs, or kids.  But if my kid was smoking dope I think I’d rather foster a relationship where they felt they could talk to me about it rather than having to sneak about hiding the fact that they were doing it.  Doubly so if it were exactly what I did when I was their age.

    sbob
    Member

    Tell him, in front of his mates, about the freaky sex you had with his mum whilst high as hell on his weed.

    The association will put him right off.

    Premier Icon northernsoul
    Subscriber

    To be fair, whilst my post above was true, the most effective thing my father did was not to make it too big an issue: “I know what you’re doing, please be careful and if you ever need any help I’ll always be here”. Short, simple and effective.

    As with many teenagers, my mates were trying it, so I did. I don’t think he could have persuaded me not to, but he did trust me to know when enough was enough (but as others have hinted, the stuff around in the 80s was not the same strength as the stuff that’s around today).

    Premier Icon Rusty Spanner
    Subscriber

    Start with some Little Feat, Dixie Chicken or Sailin’ Shoes.

    Then a bit of Cornershop, Voodoo Ray, some funk.

    Move on to some Gong, Eno or Beefheart, finish with some hot buttered soul.

    Stock up on Vimto and biscuits. Lots of biscuits.

    Premier Icon northernsoul
    Subscriber

    Lots of biscuits

    Mars bars… king size!  🍫🍫🍫

    Little Feat, Dixie Chicken or Sailin’ Shoe

    Ozric Tentacles, King Crimson, Spacemen 3…

    <p>Vimto? Nah, Snapple gets rid of dry mouth like nothing else.</p><p>Don’t have anything else to add, everyone has covered it pretty well tbh. Cougar made a good point as well, better you know what he and his pals are up to than finding out the hard way.</p>

    Premier Icon JoeG
    Subscriber
    mikey74
    Member

    Fizzy pop, crisps of all types, chocolate and the Platoon soundtrack. That’s the proper way.

    Premier Icon funkmasterp
    Subscriber

    Kyuss, Fu Manchu and Monster Magnets Dopes to Infinity. Ooh and Van Morrison’s Astral Weeks or Moondance for that mellow vibe.

    joshvegas
    Member

    Couple of tickets to amsterdam insist he follows you round the cafes.

    Premier Icon bikebouy
    Subscriber

    Don’t be a hypocrite, tell him you and you wife used to smoke the stuff, clearly he’s following in your footsteps…

    and this:

    Tell him the truth.  I can’t stand all the hypocrisy around drugs from all sides

    If you don’t want him smoking it now then you need to explain why.  will he know you used to smoke?

    No doubt sitting around getting stoned all day is a really bad thing to do especially as a teenager.  Makes people boring apart from anything else

    stumpy01
    Member

    My mind must work differently – I thought this was gonna be a thread about grumble mags….

    zanelad
    Member

    So, you can use it but he can’t!  As you say, hypocracy on  a grand scale. But then it is tbe STW way. Crack on.

    Perhaps explain how it didn’t **** up your life but it will his.

    toby1
    Member

    Punch him the nuts, that’ll learn him!

    Alternatively treat him like the adult he almost is, explain your experiences and concerns, treat him like a kid and he’ll act like one.

    Premier Icon on and on
    Member

    So what to do now?

    buy a bong and enjoy 😉

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