“Stupider like a fox”

every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain.

comes in very handy

Not a quote as such but:

I’m amazed we’ve got this far with no mention of….

‘Won’t somebody think of the children?!’

Literally hundreds of quotes I could list, but cba…

Homer searching under sofa: “$20, ah, but i wanted a peanut”
Homers brain: “$20 can buy many peanuts”
Homer: “Oohh explain how”
Homers brain: “Money can be exchanged for good and services”
Homer: “Woohoo!!!”

Bart watching Itchy & Scratchy when it gets taken off the air; “But if we don’t watch the violence then how can become desensitised to it?”

“Look at this country! U-R-Gay”

Edit: And not so much a quote on it’s own, but Krusty the Clown’s “What the hell was that?” after the Worker and Parasite show.

Carl,

“I think I’ve just logged onto my internet”

Homer (on hitting a deer): D’oh
Marge: a deer
Lisa: a female deer

Coincidentally heard earlier today in the office as a colleague was designing a poster with deers in it (on the cheap 😉 )

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKUOB8MN4Kc[/video]

Toby, it’s the bit just before that when he his searching for the peanut that makes me laugh.

Fishing under the sofa for it, ‘hmm, hard. Hmm squishy. ARGH! MOVING!!!

‘… and I owe it all to Yes I Cannabis’

Ralph, addressing Skinners boss – ‘Super Nintendo Chalmers!’

When homer asks Burns what he wants for breakfast, Burns says ‘a Dodo egg’

Marge, don’t keep blaming yourself…
blame yourself once, then move on.

Mr Burns talking about one of his aging guard dogs,

“ahh, I’ll never forget the day he bagged his first hippy, that young man didn’t think it was too grooooooovy!” 😆

(Otto playing guitar loudly.)
Homer: Will you knock it off!? I can’t hear myself think.
(Otto stops.)
Homer’s Brain: I want some peanuts.
Homer: That’s better

“Now I DRIVE the school bus”

Homer: Hey, I earned that money. While you lounge around here doing laundry and putting up drywall, I’m at work busting my hump.
Marge: Oh, please. From what I hear, you waltz in there at 10:30, take a nap on the toilet, then sit around Googling your own name until lunch.
Homer: (gasping) Who told you that?!
Marge: You shouted it while we were making love!!

“Everyone loves rats, but they don’t wanna drink the rats’ milk?”

Fishing under the sofa for it, ‘hmm, hard. Hmm squishy. ARGH! MOVING!!!

Hah, I’d long since forgotten that, genius!

“Let the fools have their tartar(e) sauce”

I’ve never seen a brain freeze this bad. Give me 50cc’s of hot fudge, stat! Hold still, you’re going to feel a slight chocolately sensation.

[video]http://youtu.be/c8pm44sveQc[/video]

Homer waiting impatiently behind someone @ traffic lights… ” Green light Moron ”

Mr Burns: “Why you’re the fattest thing i’ve ever seen and I’ve been on Safari”

Carmen Electra: My face is up here, Homer.
Homer: (looking at Carmen’s breasts) I’ve made my choice.

“That’s not a knife that’s a spoon”
“I see you’ve played knifey spoony before”

Classic episode.

From the same episode…

Bullfrog? That’s a stupid name! I’d have called them chazzwozzas!

Moll Flanders: We’re not talking about ‘love’ here Edna, we are talking about S-E-X in front of the C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N!

Krusty (suddenly paying attention) SEX CAULDRON?! I thought they’d closed that place down!

Some genius ones up there I haven’t seen, love the bunny faces on the outlets one 😀

Poison….poison…..tasty fish!

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUjGf2Grrus[/video]

[video]http://youtu.be/il8Q5ZoJELQ[/video]

And

[video]http://youtu.be/kcXYYuHOaMM[/video]

Trampopoline!

If something’s hard, then it’s not worth doing.

Tramapaline +!

Homer: Hello… My name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me.
Clerk: Okay, Mr. Burns, uhh, what’s your first name?
Homer: I don’t know…

&

Space coyote: Find your soulmate, Homer. Find your soulmate.
Homer: Where? Where?
Space coyote: This is just your memory. I can’t give you any new information.

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OECdVXlbqYE[/video]

Milhouse: I thought you said you could read lips
Bart: I assumed I could

Springfield enclosed in a big dome to contain the pollution…
We’re trapped like rats!
No, rats are too intelligent to be trapped that easily; you’re trapped like…… carrots

Heh clown college! How could I forget?!

“it’s just a little airborne it’s still good it’s still good”

‘Mmmmm forbidden donut… Sacrelicious’

From the episode where homer is trying to get fat enough to be classified as disabled, some advice from Dr Nick “You’ll want to focus on the neglected food groups. Such as the whipped group, the congealed group and the chocotastic!” and “if you’re not sure about something, rub it against a piece of paper. If the paper turns clear, it’s your window to weight gain.”