Little miss cloudnine has developed a talent and passion for sailing.  Next year if she wants to ‘progress’ will involve lots more traveling to training and competitions around the country.

Would be interested to hear any other stw experience of encouraging / pushing / driving your kids to succeed in their chosen sport.. and how it’s turned out…

My lad can ride a bike, he’s good for his age (13), I thoroughly encourage him to take part but first and foremost he’s got to be enjoying it, he’s not raced yet but he’s keen so when he’s ready he’ll have a go, I’ve got a mate who’s son is very very quick and fit, he raced up in Scotland at the weekend in an enduro, came 30th out of 50 odd but what struck me most was the amount of time he needs to make up to be in the top 10.

If your daughter is enjoying it then support her all the way for sure.

A good friend was a pro footballer back in the 90s and early 00’s the commitment required by his parents was huge, he played for 4 different clubs pre yts at Luton and his dad would have to run him all over the place whilst working full time.

I do think it’s as much a commitment from the parents as well as the kid.

Good evening,

I have two boys aged 13 and 8 both play football,  the youngest is at a professional academy and the other at county level. I’m currently doing around 300-400 miles a week and rarely see my wife and daughter between Mon and Thursday 👀🤦‍♂️,  they both love it and it’s opportunities that weren’t around when I was younger so we found it hard to say no, they both know if it doesn’t work for the family it will stop. It’s going ok so far but very tiring. The commitment is massive for kids and parents, they also know if they don’t enjoy it they can stop whenever they want. It also means I’m down to one ride a week 🤪. There is no pushing them though It’s all their choice if they want to do well. I’d say go for it but be relaxed if it does or doesn’t work. Some of the other parents I come across are very tense and pressure to make Timmy be next big thing (chance 1% to zero)

My Nieces both sail, oppi and the older one had just got into topper development squad. They spend all of their time sailing. Often one is at an event or training at the opposite end of the country to the other.  The whole family love it. The kids are seriously committed. Great opportunity, sounds like a nice crowd in the sailing setup and the RYA system sounds very good. I’m comparing this to the English skiing system which never seemed to transparent when I was involved in it.

My son is 15 and has been diving since he was about 7.  He now trains 6 days a week, about 18 hours.  He is doing it because he loves it, I saw a sports psychologist and he said they have to intrinsically want to do it.  Since he was 9 he has got the bus to training which has helped a lot.  Generally I pick him up in the evenings which involves some hanging around on my part, although I don’t have enough time to go for a ride while I wait.  We support him by doing this, paying the bills and making sure he eats and sleeps well.  He has exams coming up and the only rule is that he mustn’t let his school work suffer.  This month he is competing at the Irish Nationals, then it’s Scottish Nationals just before Christmas.  He needs time off from school for both of these.  In the New Year he goes to Eindhoven representing Scotland and then GB nationals in Sheffield at Easter.  And Scottish squad training weekends.  It’s quite a big year for him but we said that last year too.  In his club I think there may only be one diver that’s been diving for longer, so he has staying power if if nothing else.  I find spending so much time at the pool exhausting, I listen to a lot of podcasts.  I find the pushy parents insufferable, they’re the ones that sit as close to the boards as possible and spend most of their time questioning the coaching.  The parents I do get on with, like myself are suffering from fatigue.  The running back and forth, the costs involved, the stress of wanting your kid to do well and achieve their goals.  At least none of us are looking at our kids as golden tickets.

If you’re pushing and encouraging them, it’s probably not going to happen.  If they are keen and pushing themselves, then you have a much greater chance of it happening.  Make it fun occasionally so they don’t see it as a chore.

Be prepared to get involved yourself – coaching, officiating, volunteering – most clubs need loads of these, and whilst it shouldn’t impact your child’s chances, then it can increase the potential of event entry or team selection.

Be a role model – do some racing yourself so the kids see it as ‘normal’

Always, always tell them that you enjoy watching and supporting them

(12 yr old daughter with national level swimming ambitions)

echoing the above on pushing.

i had a colleague whos family had pushed him and pushed him and all he ever wanted to do was please his family. He had good levels of success

Eventually it came to a point where  he could not continue , but equally could not tell his family  he did not want to continue because of the time and money they invested in him.

What ended up happening got really messy and he was medically discharged from the team.

He is now living a normal life and by all accounts has no regrets.

Some of his team mates have gone onto big things but knowing them and their dad – the difference was their dad was a GB level athlete albe it in a different sport him self in his younger days which i feel makes a big difference to understanding how you go about being supportive without being pushy.

My folks drove me all over the country racing DH in my youth. No pressure to do well i was never much better than mid pack unless i was having a really good day when id pop into the top 10 on my ancient bike. when you turn up to races these days theres more bling in the youth cat  than their is in the adults.

Pretty much what Wrightyson said.

My lad (as some will have seen on here) is pretty good at sports. He’s also very talented musically.

He was last year one of the best goalkeepers around and plays the flute for the young Philharmonic group, along with being a bit handy on a MTB…. but the important thing is ENJOYMENT. Not pushing so hard they end up hating it…

But on the flip side, you can end up where you think “what if we just……” and that’s a slippery slope and a tough one to answer i have to say.

when you turn up to races these days theres more bling in the youth cat  than their is in the adults.

The number of kids on proper £3000 FS bikes at the FoD kids enduro was staggering at the weekend. I was honestly stunned at some of their bikes.

If you’re pushing and encouraging them, it’s probably not going to happen.

No… all she wants to do is go sailing.  Its more pushing her to do homework.

Interesting to hear the various stories /experiences

My son (15yo) plays football at a good level (just below pro academies – which they play pretty often). Almost all of the lads have been at academies at one time or another. My son has been asked to go to trial at academies but he doesn’t want to go and I’m fine with that. He just wants to play and enjoy his football. There are a number of parents (of squad members) who’s exclusive subject of conversation is getting their child into an academy, its pretty sad. We have a couple of lads join this year who have “been at been at club X since they were 8-10”. Some have had good experiences and some terrible. All in all I see a massive amount of football parents pushing kids and its not healthy.

Never push, if the kid wants to do it they will push themselves.

The higher up the tree they get the more important mental strength/ toughness becomes important and I reckon that is where parents can really help.

The other area that parents can help is the politics of the sport and networking / brown nosing. It is there in every sport where kids are getting through to national squad level.

My personal experience comes from getting to international ski racing level.  I lacked the ultimate mental drive to make it to the top.

My niece is just coming to the end of the RYA junior system and it has been a really positive experience for her.

sailing has the advantage that there is not much you can do mid week other than a bit of strength training, That puts it all at the weekends taking much of her mums time ferrying her down to the coast or wherever they have training / racing. they are experts in finding nice economic accommodation. (I would have bought a van!)

The RYA system is I understand very good , lots of training on life skills, after all sending your kid out in a Oppy to an imaginary start line a mile offshore of Weymough harbour needs some skills. (and balls)

For the last couple of years the family summer holiday has been where they are holding the World Championships, This year was 420 in the USA

Taking a break this year as the qualifying races are during A-Levels

Nick

I’ve recently read The Talent Lab which was interesting and has a chapter about how to parent a top level athlete.  I’m fairly certain the RYA provide information to the parents of the children in their youth squads

As it happens, I listened to this yesterday. Interesting discussions and interviews from the Freakonomics guys.

(Sorry, could t do a direct link.)

This has been an ongoing discussion between my wife and I, as well as some parents that frequent the same races as us. It’s caused a bit of soul searching for me as I try to take an honest look at my own motivations when looking at my kids’ sport (but probably my son’s primarily, as he’s the most keen).

He’s 9yo – younger than others here –  and just loves riding his bike. He’s quick – I won’t pretend that he’s leaving all of his peers for dead – but regardless of whether he wins or loses, he just loves riding his bike. I encourage him to race as it’s good for him to test himself against others and, frankly, he really likes the social element of it. I’ll be honest and admit that I am quite pushy because I want to see him do the best that he can, so he has decent kit and I try to take him to as many events as I can without my wife making me sleep in the shed.

That said, I’m really worried, not so much about what I see in my own son, but more about the weariness that I see in others oh his age and I never want him to feel that riding his bike is a chore to keep Dad happy at weekends. Recently, we’ve started doing other cycling that he chooses (mostly mountain biking, which we always do non-competitively) and he’s also started doing cross country running through school – this was his choice, at least partly driven by a girl in his class that he likes that is a really good runner 🙂 . This has been a revelation for him as he has discovered that all of the cycle fitness that he’s gained over the last few months translates very well into running and from his first races, he’s been at the front of the field which has given him a huge boost in confidence!

My son is a lot younger and obviously taking sport less seriously than others here, but I want him to be in it for the long haul and whatever he decides to do, I want him to enjoy every minute of it.

Nothing to add to the thread, but:

The number of kids on proper £3000 FS bikes at the FoD kids enduro was staggering at the weekend. I was honestly stunned at some of their bikes.

Just watched the slice of welsh cake video (really good) but was surprised but how young the riders appeared to me, but how blinged out a few of the bikes were!

DD, just downloaded that podcast, will have a listen.

The whole “Hidden Side of Sports” series is good. Obviously, it’s a bit US centric but still some fascinating stuff in there all the same.

Apols to OP – gone a bit OT there. 😀

I’m in a similar position albeit way back. My daughter is 5 and since starting ice skating for fun about 2 years ago has progressed to an hours skating on a Wednesday and 2 hours on a Saturday including personal and group coaching time.

Just writing that out gives me the fear but she enjoys it and we have never pushed her. We’ve been told she has a talent for it and I can honestly see us going all over the country in a few years time when she gets to competition level. It’s hard not to get excited for her but at the same time we would hate to be those parents and have her ending up hating it. We do encourage her but only as far as not letting her get down when she’s not getting something right or praising her when she does well, we definitely don’t push her like some parents (and you can tell the ones that do as the kids look miserable). If she decided she didn’t want to do it any more then honestly I wouldn’t be too upset as she would have already gained so much.

So yeah tl:dr – by all means encourage and enable her but don’t be pushy and don’t make her feel like she owes you anything.

I’ll be honest I’ve just bought my son a new bike, however it’s for Christmas and everyone loves a new bike at Christmas. It’s not 3k tho. He absolutely loves bikes and the n+1 rule is under constant threat. This will be a huge surprise and also treat for him and will be for his birthday too due to the cost. However he currently rides my 8 year old xc full sus and makes it dance, so I hope the new bike will inspire further drive in to him. When I mention racing he says yeah I fancy that but until he says dad I want to race then we’ll wait.

My Nieces both sail, oppi and the older one had just got into topper development squad. They spend all of their time sailing. Often one is at an event or training at the opposite end of the country to the other.  The whole family love it. The kids are seriously committed. Great opportunity, sounds like a nice crowd in the sailing setup and the RYA system sounds very good. I’m comparing this to the English skiing system which never seemed to transparent when I was involved in it.

When I was about 14 or 15 I was offered a place training with the Scottish youth sailing squad.  I didn’t take it up for various reasons, not least of which that my parents didn’t sail and they expected the parents to buy and then cart a boat around the country.  We weren’t well off, my mum didn’t drive and my Dad certainly worked far too hard to be driving huge distances at the weekends just for me (I was one of three kids).  A few times over the years I’ve wondered how things might have been different, mostly I was glad, which perhaps is more a reflection on my commitment than anything.  However in c.2012 I went to help my brother with an RYA regional competition he was running.  The level of parental commitment and pushiness was out of this world.  I’ve seen some pretty eye brow raising stuff from parents at bike races, but these were a whole level above that.  I would have hated it.  My parents more so.  Success at this event would get you a place in a national coaching programme which ultimately MIGHT lead to selection for the national team and in 8 yrs time a place in the Olympics.  There were parents there who were getting so agitated about little Rupert and whether he had been obstructed by Tristan and how that might be the thing that stops them going to Tokyo 2020…  It may be different in different regions, but from what I can tell this was certainly not an unusual level of behaviour.  Yes the RYA have an amazing coaching programme, but I’m not convinced it was actually doing anything constructive for grass roots sailing, was certainly not primarily interested in the kids enjoying themselves.  I got the feeling that most of the parents wanted to have an olympic athlete child rather than a happy child who enjoys themselves.  To be at that level you essentially need to be at events (training, racing, coaching) virtually every weekend during the season.  Most events are two days.  Its a huge commitment.  Many of them (parents and children) must get to a point where they hate it.  The RYA programme at the time (and as far as I know it is no different now) is about finding the next bunch of elite sailors and training them up to win medals, because medals = funding.  Unlike cycling or running events where usually the parents can also compete etc, for these elite youth events there doesn’t seem to be adults sailing events taking place at the same time – so its not even that you can enjoy yourself – which probably leads to more discussions amongst parents with them each trying to out do each other whether its the motor home (there are no cheap camper vans at this) or knowledge of the rules, the latest kit etc…

I am lucky to be involved with the coaching of  top level younger athletes (14-18 yr olds) And t<span style=”font-size: 12.8px;”>he commitment from parents really does need to be bettering that of the kids, from the constant time demands (driving to training / matches / competitions) to the supervision, to the nutrition, to dealing with </span>injuries,<span style=”font-size: 12.8px;”> to getting the balance right between school, sports, family etc. It soon goes from being a fun way of spending time with your children (such as helping with coaching when they are U6/7/8 level) or getting a race in on the same day as them, to what is essentially a second job. And thats before the monetary cost is taken into account. More training = more cost, more competitions = more kit, more kit = bigger car etc etc etc. </span>

<span style=”font-size: 12.8px;”>Its not necessarily the pushiest parents who produce the best athletes, but there is (IMHO) a link between parents who are driven / focused, and the effect this has on the children. You can have all the natural talent in the world, but if you’re not being told to push yourself (in the correct way!) you wont achieve the best results. This is such a delicate balance, above all though they are still kids, and pressure from parents, coaches, clubs, teammates, teachers etc is a massive melting pot that can very quickly turn kids away from a sport that they should enjoy. Keep it fun and you’ll help them to stay interested. If you keep them interested they can keep progressing. If they keep progressing you never know where it may end. In 99.999% of the time it wont be the Olympics, but the journey along the way will shape them for the rest of their life.</span>

As a child, I seem to remember being about 10, I played squash with my dad one day when away on holiday. Turned out I had fairly good hand/eye co-ordination, and enjoyed it, so carried on.

They never pushed me, but offered to take me to tournaments etc, I went into the junior county squad U14 from there & ended up U19’s top 20 in the world, national squad, national team, world champs, etc.

At 18, I was sick of it. So one day, just stopped playing. Again, my parents were probably the anti of most I experienced throughout my time playing. I witnessed some shocking moments of pushy parents, some of which probably bordered on abuse levels, I have no doubt that’s still the case today.

If and when I have children, I’ll adopt the same attitude as my parents, I’ll help support them in any way I can, but the decision to do it, has to come from them, not me.

I’ve only recently been able to start playing squash again, and do enjoy it. I play for my club in the county leagues & even the level of competition in that surprises me sometimes. But, I’ll never even get remotely close to my former playing ability, so now it’s just for fun and winter fitness 🙂

This is a sensitive subject, your family life, so I am trying to tread lightly and not be rude.

But honestly I liked to hear why those who make round trips of hundreds of miles or those who invest countless hours, do it?

Some of the posts above sound crazy to me… I know, each to their own…. And all the power to you if you have the time, money and inclination.

But at the end of the day, what do you get for your investment?

What are the missed opportunities for your child, his/her siblings, the family as a whole or indeed …just even yourselves ??

I ask because I have this conversation with my wife. But the conversation doesn’t go very far because she’ll hit me with the …. “i’ll do anything for our kids”… And there is not much arguing with that.

But honestly I liked to hear why those who make round trips of hundreds of miles or those who invest countless hours, do it?

I enjoy watching my son play rugby, he enjoys playing rugby. We get quality time together.

What are the missed opportunities for your child, his/her siblings, the family as a whole or indeed …just even yourselves ??

My daughter swam to a reasonable level. She enjoyed swimming, I enjoyed watching her compete. We got quality time together. She’s stopped now. Her decision, I supported that decision.

But at the end of the day, what do you get for your investment?

They get to do something they really enjoy. I get to enjoy watching them to that. We get to spend quality time together.

…. “i’ll do anything for our kids”… And there is not much arguing with that.

As a parent is it not part of the gig to support your children and help them achieve their goals?

I wish my parents had pushed me a bit more tbh, I’ve always wanted to do stuff but never really got good enough at any one thing. My dad took me to play for a rugby team but I got bored and my parents just let me give it up.

My son (10) is similar now, he loves sport in general and does everything he can at school, but he lacks motivation when it comes to an actual race scenario or competition and is happy to just make up the numbers. I’m scared to push him too much though. I try to give him motivational speeches (I know that makes me sound like a tit) but don’t want to put him off. He’s a very good cyclist, swimmer, runner and rugby player but he’s also pretty sensitive so I daren’t push him too much at the moment. Hopefully high school will give him a bit of competitive edge!!

“what do you get for your investment?”

huh – are we still talking kids or your SIPP?

I’ll comment, but I have no kids – however I do organise sailing training events on behalf of the RYA and other training events for Youth at my sailing club  – HISC.

1) training is structured, after the initial appraisal kids go into groups. From there they enter fleets (Oppi/Tera) then move into Feva and onto 29ers.

2) no kid is pushed at anything. The structure is built around capability and if the kid is incapable they drop down until they are capable. There is no repression or holding back, its a structured way of identifying a few kids that need more help.

3) assistance, all training and events rely on parents helping out. Do what you can. Turn up-drop off and disappear is frowned upon unless you have a nominated adult looking after your offspring.

4) events, held twice a month at my club. That doesn’t include other events around the country. If you want to progress, attend every event at your chosen club.

5) it’s time consuming, event management on both parental and club level has to be supported and planned. No point going half cocked to a training event to find you’ve gone to the wrong location.

6) kit and craft, it’s expensive. You’ll need at least a few wetsuits and 2-3 spraytops, buoyancy aid, gloves boots etc. Budget £300 minimum for that lot, don’t loose it or leave it in the changing rooms or beach. Boat, link up with someone who want crew/helm and go halves on a boat. You can spend anything from £800-£4K on a boat so sharing costs is what most do. Invariably helm/crew stay together for a couple of seasons then join other crew/helm. It’s just progress with the kids nothing to worry about. Take care of the boat.

7) physical, looking after boats and kit takes a long time. Your kids maybe playing on the water for 2x3hr stints so that’s all day. Unpacking/packing is another couple of hours and that’s a whole day before you blink. We run two day events so boats can remain rigged leaving the Sat eve for fun and frolics.

8) clubs, you don’t have to be a member of a club for attend RYA training events. If you do join a club that opens out to all manner of like minded people and friendships and also somewhere to keep your boat when not using it. Not all clubs are as slickly run as mine, in other clubs the onus is on the family to organise and attend and help out, ours totally depends on our memebrship helping out.. without them we wouldn’t be able to run them.

9) sailing, it’s ace. You will make friendships that will last for a lifetime.

HTHs

Just to add the flip-side to this:

I was a pretty good cricketer in my youth, played a few games at County level but my dad wasn’t the sort to really go out of his way to make it easy for me to progress. He loved his golf and that took up Saturdays and he wasn’t too keen on driving me to & fro and mum was too busy doing house stuff etc.

At U16 I was opening bat and bowler for school and club but didn’t really get the chance to shine at County as I wasn’t able to travel to training as often as was needed so, eventually, I was no longer selected. I was in the process of honing my leg-spin too which wasn’t that common back then.

I do think I held it against him for quite a long time as, when I needed support it wasn’t there.

Bikebouy description more closely matches my nieces experience than Polys

🙂

Hi again,

In response to Ro5ey, you don’t sound rude and it is a perfectly reasonable question, I do it because I can see the enjoyment the boys get out of it. The younger son actually wants to play football as a ‘career'( chances slim to F.. all), but while he loves doing it I will help best I can by taking him to the sessions and games. If in the near future he no longer wants to do it that’s fine by me, I’m not looking at getting a return turn on my ‘investment’, a smile is good enough for me. I do agree though that what we do may sound crazy to others and it is hard work but if I can I will help my kids to do what they want, and I enjoy doing so 🙂

My son’s happy, that’s a good enough return for me.  That’s a bit flippant so I’ll also say that when he joined the club it took him out of his comfort zone.  I’ve watched him go from the quiet kid at the back to someone who communicates really well and has a quiet self confidence and belief in himself.  And without sounding like I’m bragging but when he rips a dive from 10m, nobody else in his club does it better and it’s amazing to watch.  He rarely complains either and having listened to Tom Daley on Desert island discs I’m gobsmacked at what they put themselves through.

My nephew is hoping to be a top flight cricketer (currently in Yorkshire development squad) & he has also spent a fair bit of time playing football at various club academies.  He’s never needed pushing, he bloody lives for it.  Never seen a kid who’s as dedicated to training/practice as he is.  His mum and dad have driven him the length and breadth of the country to give him every chance, at the expense of holidays and family time etc.  Hopefully he keeps it up and makes it to pro level 🙂

It takes a lot of money, hard work and time (and a decent amount of luck) from everyone involved to get anywhere nr top flight sport, no-one should underestimate that.  It takes hard work and time to even to be mediocre at most sports! 🙂

After they quit swimming (2 early mornings and one evening each week – I was lucky, she wasn’t brilliant) one of my daughters was asked if she’d like to be in a gymnastics development squad

“nah, they make you do at least 15 hours a week”

never has a silent “Get in!” been so close to being said out loud

But honestly I liked to hear why those who make round trips of hundreds of miles or those who invest countless hours, do it?

Because the kids love it and, generally, as a parent, I love to see my kids doing the stuff they love. I want them to have as many cool opportunities as they can, while they can (or want to) enjoy them. The cost, to a large extent, doesn’t enter into it. Same for my time.

Some of the posts above sound crazy to me… I know, each to their own…. And all the power to you if you have the time, money and inclination.

But at the end of the day, what do you get for your investment?

If you’re thinking of it in those terms, then you’ve got it all wrong to start with. At the moment, I spend every Sunday morning stood in a muddy field in the rain, watching my son ride around in circles. I then drive home and spend almost as long cleaning his kit. The next day, I’ll stand by the side of a freezing race track while both kids do their weekly training session.

I’m quite sure I’m not unique here – exchange “track” with “pitch”, “pool” or anywhere else where kids do sport, and all over the country you’ll find parents stood miserable in the rain supporting their kids. It’s what we do and we don’t expect any return on this investment except that our kids will be better off for having a sport that they can call their own and the knowledge that, by getting them active at an early age, they won’t be part of the country’s obesity statistics.

What are the missed opportunities for your child, his/her siblings, the family as a whole or indeed …just even yourselves ??

Now you sound like my wife 😉 I admit that this can be problematic, especially at the moment when there’s a lot on at weekends, but it settles down after Christmas so it’s not like it will be as intense for the whole year around. I try to involve both kids and my wife where possible, so that it’s not too one-sided – in fact, my daughter enjoys volunteering and helping out at events and there’s always a need for more helpers!

My 18yr old son has just started on the Welsh U23 cycling team.  He progressed from local team, to bigger team, to Welsh U18.  He has raced at almost the very top UCI level races (excluding the nation cup races which only GB are allowed to race).

He has a lot of drive, which is needed to train day in, day out.  He balanced training with A levels and 3 jobs.  He didn’t have a drink after his 18th until 6 months after his birthday.  It has taken a lot of effort from him to get where he is.

But he enjoys (almost) every second of it and has raced all around Europe against many countries.

The life skills are huge.  Along with his collection of bikes!  (race bike, spare race bike, track bike, cross, bmx, mtb, winter) and many wheels.

I have probably driven him thousands and thousands of miles (furthest was to Austria for a 3 day race).  Been to Belgium many many times now.

His brother a few months ago said that he wished we had pushed him when he was younger and not very interested in racing (he is interested now and playing catch up).

There are many kids who are now slowing dropping out, some through lack of options, some through the rate of attrition.

Grr Formatting

Sorry Im a city knob…. so yeah … investment ?? … You do one thing, you miss out on something else.

So just like deciding what bike, wood burning stove, coffee machine to buy … I want to make sure we are doing the right thing …. for the whole family.

I can’t help feeling we have, as a society, swung too far in being kid eccentric…. I dont’ know? My dad worked 6 days a week.. I hardly ever saw him.

As for rugby it’s one sport, in my experience, where this doesn’t happen, …. The RFU’s Kids First program, stops all streaming, early positioning of players and even limits total time allowed playing…. as such everyone has brilliant fun

Sorry Im a city knob…. so yeah … investment ?? … You do one thing, you miss out on something else.

Goibg back to the podcast I mentioned earlier – they had a section on this. Can’t remember the name of the athlete but he spoke about his wife and extended family still seeing and meeting with friends from school, neighbours from when they grew up etc. One day it dawned on him that he never ever did this. He had friends that were teammates and through the sport but nobody that connected him with his childhood.

My daughter has a talent for gymnastics, selected to go artistic level at age 6 and competes at County level at the moment age 9, in terms of hours she does 10hours a week, but the gymnastics gives her a very good baseline fitness, she gets selected for lots of other stuff cross country, swimming athletics. I guess she averages about 20hours all in. Her school has been very supportive, she struggled at infant school, but gained huge confidence from doing her sports at juniors. So much so, she went from requiring special education needs to exceeding expecting in 2 years.

I encourage her to do as much as she can, but I’m realistic about her abilities. She enjoys it at present, if it becomes a chore then it’s time to re evaluate.Due to my daughters participation I ended coaching gymnastics and have met some very pushy parents. One incident ended with the parents being banned from the gym, another where the girl finished 11 in the County and her mum reduced her to tears in front of the team because she hadn’t done better. She only started gymnastics 6 months beforehand, amazing talent but gave up because of the pressure she was under. I’ve seen some shocking behaviour from other clubs coaches too.

Either my wife or I are out every day of the week doing something with her or her brother but we make sure there is family time. Saturday for instance is a day we all spend together. I don’t begrudge it at all, she has some fantastic opportunities and I’m fortunate to have a work life balance that allows me to get involved and support her.