a glass of port is a nice thing. half a bottle would be ghastly.
a glass of chilled champagne is nice. half a bottle would be ghastly.
i’m a sexist, so i will assume that the lager/wine will be shared on a you/her basis.
8 cans of lager should be enough to get you drunk, but you’ll get bored and full of fizz before you get there.
you need some variety. (try rum and coke with amaretto – i call it a ‘steaming weasel’)
(or cider and lime, with Rum: that’s called a Snafu)
is one bottle of red enough for your missus? – does she actually prefer white? will you be in trouble later when she realises that she doen’t like red, or lager or port?
or champagne…
and you’ve drunk all the lager?