Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 94 total)
  • Dog shit megathread*
  • Cougar
    Full Member

    Bowl of Pedigree Chum, sachet of Picolax, wait for dogs to return home.

    shifter
    Free Member

    If I could’ve, I would’ve.

    oldmanmtb
    Free Member

    Super soaker full of your piss- drench dog….

    Works on cats also.

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    epicyclo
    Full Member

    grizedaleforest – Member
    Dogs are territorial therefore you need to demonstrate that this is your territory and that you are big and aggresive enough to defend it.

    Just in case you’re daft enough to try that idea.

    Many years ago my wife got dressed up in a tiger suit for a fancy dress party and thought it would be a good idea to give the dog a fright by jumping out at it and roaring.

    There was a fright alright.

    The dog launched itself straight at her throat, full fangs extended, not even a growl, no hesitation. Luckily she managed to squeak its name at the last moment.

    Seeing as it was a Great Dane Wolfhound X the impact was considerable.

    Our great hairy placid lovable lump turned out to be a much better guard dog than we realised. 🙂

    Oh, and if anyone thinks they have a dog turd problem, they should see what I have to shovel out of my backyard every morning from our current Great Dane Wolfhound X….

    Poopscoop
    Full Member

    Hire me.

    Email in profile.

    PPG or you pay fees.

    I live in Kent so you also pay travel costs.

    onandon
    Free Member

    mrhoppy
    Full Member

    Admittedly this is for cats pissing but I’m sure you could scale up appropriately.

    [video]https://youtu.be/uIbkLjjlMV8[/video]

    jolmes
    Free Member

    Fill the gaps in your fence, send the bill to the owners.

    Post the poop back through their letter box with a note
    “returning to sender x 🙂 “

    Camp out in the garden lying in wait for said dogs, spray pepper up their nose.

    Set of bombers?

    martinhutch
    Full Member

    Do all Aussies look like Pat Cash?

    Would need to be combined with oldmanmtb’s piss-filled super-soaker for maximum enjoyment.

    fitnessischeating
    Free Member

    I bought a motion activated sprinkler from amazon for about £20
    it stopped the cats I was having the same problem with.

    lasted about 18mths before it died, and I haven’t yet replaced it, as the cats have learnt to avoid my garden.

    once they start again, I will have no hesitation in getting another.

    might not be this one, but looks more or less the same

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/PestBye-Battery-Operated-Activated-Repellent/dp/B004YCUT4W/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1512463740&sr=8-1&keywords=motion+activated+sprinkler

    natrix
    Free Member

    Bowl of Pedigree Chum, sachet of Picolax, wait for dogs to return home.

    😆 😆 😆

    martinhutch
    Full Member

    Bowl of Pedigree Chum, sachet of Picolax, wait for dogs to return home.

    Yeh, but when the dog needs the loo, it whines at the door, then gets let out to explosively decompress in the OP’s back garden. A plan that literally backfires in the worst way possible.

    Jakester
    Free Member

    We have similar problems, and also get fox and badger crap as well.

    Suggestions to dissuade those beasts were to scatter chopped chilies over the area or shake/spray hot sauce around on the lawn. Haven’t yet done that, but have (ahem) marked my territory (ahem) which appears to have reduced the incidences of random animal crappage…

    DezB
    Free Member

    Seriously, why don’t you just block any gaps so they can’t come through?
    Or (not so seriously) get your own dog, like a Ridgeback so they don’t stray over into his land.

    user-removed
    Free Member

    Nah. Don’t put up with that. Buy some see through freezer bags, pick up the doings and pop them politely but visibly on top of offenders’ wheelie bins. They’ll soon get the message.

    oikeith
    Full Member

    When the dog you dont like triggers your lights take pics or videos and use these to speak to the owner and inform them if nothing is done you’ll re approach GARDA (what is GARDA?)

    franksinatra
    Full Member

    what is GARDA?

    Police force of Republic of Ireland, so they are.

    franksinatra
    Full Member

    Keep it simple. If you catch a dog doing it, bag the shit up, take it round to the neighbour, empty the bag by their front door and shout a bit. They’ll soon get bored and deal with it.

    perchypanther
    Free Member

    Deploy the tranquilliser sausage?

    Jakester
    Free Member

    perchypanther – Member
    Deploy the tranquilliser sausage?

    (c) any middle-aged white male in Hollywood.

    PJM1974
    Free Member

    I live in a small, picturesque village. We’ve new people who’ve moved in a few doors down and suddenly the pavement in our street is spattered with dog eggs all over the place.

    If I identify the culprits’ owners then I’m going to bag it up for them and post it through their letter box.

    PJM1974
    Free Member

    Actually, typing the above made me so angry that I’ve submitted a report to Fix My Street.

    I’m now only a step away from subscribing to the Daily Mail and existing in perpetual rage at any anti-social behaviour, real or imagined.

    simons_nicolai-uk
    Free Member

    In a previous house I delivered dog shits back to their owners a few times. Turd on the doorstep is a pretty clear message.

    If you want to send a stronger signal then wiping the turd under the door handles of the owner’s car.

    Another alternative is to get the dogs to clean up after themselves. Big cheap bag of grated cheese from the supermarket, sprinkle liberally over turd. The theory is that the next dog to come along wolfs down the lot.

    RustySpanner
    Full Member

    Ex next door neighbor decided our cat was to blame for all the crap in his garden, so bagged it and called round and handed it to my wife – on the day of her father’s funeral.

    Things escalated.
    They’ve moved now.

    Try and be diplomatic.
    🙂

    rmacattack
    Free Member

    Be thankful it’s dog poop and not some of the cat crap I’ve had to encounter. Funny how a dog owner can get a fine but a cat owner cant.

    RustySpanner
    Full Member

    It wasn’t our cat.
    🙂

    Soppy old thing used to crap in our garden.

    DezB
    Free Member

    Funny how a dog owner can get a fine

    I think that’s only on public land though. They can crap in whoever’s garden they like (well, their dogs can).

    franksinatra
    Full Member

    Be thankful it’s dog poop and not some of the cat crap I’ve had to encounter. Funny how a dog owner can get a fine but a cat owner cant.

    I totally agree. In my old house my neighbour had a cat that would shit in my garden every night. I asked him what he would do if I lifted a dog over his fence and allowed it to shit in his garden. He went nuts and said it was totally diferent as you can’t control cats.

    Obvious answer, don’t own any animal that you can’t control.

    And why are horse owners allowed to let their animals dump on the pavement?

    sharkbait
    Free Member

    What bikebouy said….. try and get hold of some second hand electric fence/string off ebay. You’ll only need it for a short while because once the dogs have been zapped once I can guarantee they won’t be coming back so you could then sell it again!
    (You can replace the electric string with normal string to put the frighteners on the dogs once the real stuff has gone.)

    PIR sensor linked via a relay to a 12v car battery. The relay is attached to an electric car window winder which is in turn linked to a hozelock power activator and either a sprinkler (or in my case, the pressure washer).

    Not a bad idea and would make a great project for a Raspberry Pi!

    maccruiskeen
    Full Member

    And why are horse owners allowed to let their animals dump on the pavement?

    Would you argue with a horse?

    vmgscot
    Full Member

    Airsoft bb gun

    DezB
    Free Member

    don’t own any animal that you can’t control.

    Ban all pet cats?

    andybrad
    Full Member

    i would simply shovel it up and deposit it on the offending neighbors car.

    brakes
    Free Member

    we had a neighbour’s dog visit our garden a few times, each time it visited it just had a sniff around then left. but then it did a wee on the kid’s trampoline. it didn’t come back after I gave it a good boot up the arse.
    true story.

    user-removed
    Free Member

    Obvious answer, don’t own any animal that you can’t control.

    You don’t have any children then…

    franksinatra
    Full Member

    Ban all pet cats?

    Ban all wildlife murdering, garden shitting, fighting and searching, self serving cats?

    Okay then! Why not?

    andybrad
    Full Member

    this but slightly bigger?

    fossy
    Full Member

    Wrap it in paper, put it on the owners drive and set fire to it. Ring bell and run off.

    eddiebaby
    Free Member

    We went kitesurfing to Tarifa and stayed in a nice little hotel near the beach.
    Every couple of days we would get the gear out, put it on the hotel lawns and with the manager’s blessing we hosed the gear down and got the salt off it. Then a guest turned up in a motor home with two Alsatians that crapped everywhere on the lawns and he never cleaned up after them. We saved the crap up for a couple of days and then coated his windscreen and windows plus the inside of his door handles.
    He got the message.

    singletrackmind
    Full Member

    You know those curved ball throwing sticks that dog owners love?
    Buy one . Load up with turds , launch at neighbours front door.
    I would imagine the ‘whump’ of a good sized dog egg flattening itself against the door will give you a feel good feeling, but will also prompt the neighbours to open the door.

    The ensuing ‘ Oh my friggin god , What the …. who would do such a thing …. You barstewards …SHARON …. SHARON , get yourself out here now … .. LOOK , Just look . Look There is turd all over the letterbox” would be worth filming, from a long , long way away

Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 94 total)

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