cynic-al's "oh no, we've run out of ideas, what can we sell now" award thread

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  • cynic-al's "oh no, we've run out of ideas, what can we sell now" award thread
  • hora
    Member

    Chainrings flex? WHO will benefits from these? Are hobby mountainbikers THAT powerful?

    Really appeals to a white/anglosaxon’s males insecurity.

    I know I’ve said it before but 29’ers tend to be ridden by middle-aged males, ‘looking for something’ (in their lives).

    Premier Icon ratherbeintobago
    Subscriber

    One-Oh-Four-Bee-Cee-Dee anything else is frippery.

    Are hobby mountainbikers THAT powerful?

    Er, isn’t is a road chainset?

    Still bollocks, mind.

    Premier Icon richmtb
    Subscriber

    Nevermind the chainring bollocks

    WTF is a 29er specific saddle?

    Jamie
    Member

    WTF is a 29er specific saddle?

    The future.

    Premier Icon ratherbeintobago
    Subscriber

    WTF is a 29er specific saddle?

    Also bollocks?

    LoCo
    Member

    Jameso have you got a link to the Liteville different size wheel bikes please not on their website.

    Premier Icon ahwiles
    Subscriber

    can i nominate 10speed?* – 8 and 9 were getting a bit over the top.

    (and obviously 11speed)

    also, 15mm axles.

    i’ve been saying this for years: bikes, as an engineering problem, have been solved.

    Premier Icon althepal
    Subscriber

    Was there not a wee trend a few years back for 24/26″ wheels? Seem to recall Spesh did it with the bighit?

    Was there not a wee trend a few years back for 24/26″ wheels? Seem to recall Spesh did it with the bighit?

    Cannondale did it years before that.

    LoCo
    Member

    My current FS bike bike is a 26″ frame with 29er front and 650 rear ๐Ÿ˜‰

    quite liked the old bighit I had briefly, as long as there were no large holes around ๐Ÿ˜†

    Premier Icon aracer
    Subscriber

    Aracer, I must be thick, what is the similarly / IP you are referring to?

    The Campag chainset I pictured or are you referring to something else I mentioned?

    I’m surprised they’re making such a big deal. My FSA K-Force cranks are 620g including rings and BB.

    Is that real or quoted weight? Shimano (and Campag) do at least normally provide accurate claimed weights – FSA are notorious for being “optimistic”. Good point mind you, the Campag Record pictured above is 670g all in, a SR titanium one 630g, so they’re crowing about all this high tech allowing them to get close to the competition!

    More lazy and feeble journalism.

    Is it not just BR cutting and pasting Shimano marketing guff (though that of course is the very definition of lazy journalism)? I suppose I would actually expect better of Shimano marketing department though. The real sign that it’s BS though is the mention of the strength of pro riders, when it’s actually overweight biffers who put more force through their drivetrain.

    Premier Icon aracer
    Subscriber

    29’ers tend to be ridden by middle-aged males, ‘looking for something’ (in their lives).

    I know a few juniors (who’d thrash almost anybody on here on a mountain bike, up or down) who ride them – should I tell them they’ve got it all wrong?

    hora
    Member

    This came up last time I said it- the majority of 29’er riders ARE middle aged.

    aracer – they’d thrash us on 24″ probably too. Before the cumulative effect of alcohol, bacon and the onset of fear all of us were faster.

    I take it you own a 29’er and are middle-aged hence the rise? ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Premier Icon aracer
    Subscriber

    Before the cumulative effect of alcohol, bacon and the onset of fear all of us were faster.

    OK maybe I should have said they’d have thrashed most people on here on a mountain bike (up or down) when we were at our peaks. Oh and I almost forgot I also “know” (well she has coached mini-aracer on a bike and I’ve ridden with her a few times) somebody who beats the best in the world on the downs on a 29er.

    I take it you own a 29’er and are middle-aged hence the rise?

    Well yes, but given it’s a unicycle (which teenagers appear to think is cool) that probably discounts both parts.

    Junkyard
    Member

    29’ers tend to be ridden by middle-aged males, ‘looking for something’ (in their lives).

    What about serial swappers of frames that are too small?
    Some folk like 29 ers what is the point calling them names?
    Says more about you than them IMHO

    That saddle is a solution to a problem that doe snot exist

    hora
    Member

    What about serial swappers of frames that are too small?

    Who says they are too small? I don’t. I own one bike. Do you have a solution where I can own 3+ bikes like everyone else on STW?

    Some folk like 29 ers what is the point calling them names?

    Its observational.

    Says more about you than them IMHO

    I’ve no idea what you are on about.

    aracer

    They could beat all of us in our prime? Possibly. I know a couple of blokes who SHOULD be top drivers/top of their field but never had the parents/money/time behind them. My point is when you have realised talent you can beat an average Joe on basically anything within reason.

    The ’29’er can do it in this’ argument gets my back up. I don’t like seeing a manu/mag/paid rider extolling the virtues of spending money.

    mudsoul
    Member

    Anything “enduro specific”.

    bencooper
    Member

    can i nominate 10speed?* – 8 and 9 were getting a bit over the top.

    (and obviously 11speed)

    I’ve seen the Shimano 14-speed patents.

    It’s the classic maturing market problem. When no-one had MTBs, the job was to convince people that MTBs were cool and hip and happening. Now most people who want MTBs have them, the job is to convince them that the MTBs they have are rubbish and they need a new one.

    hora
    Member

    On a basic level -I saw an ad on STW ‘new knuckle-box system with weapons-grade aluminium’.

    Jesus wept its a single pivot alu frame.

    Premier Icon aracer
    Subscriber

    My point is when you have realised talent you can beat an average Joe on basically anything within reason.

    Yes, but my point is that as extremely good riders racing at the sharp end they choose to ride 29ers.

    I’ll join in with the rest of you at being rude about marketing men’s wet dream 27″ bikes, but despite not owning a bike with 29″ wheels myself you’re all wrong about those not having any useful purpose.

    The 29er specific saddle is an absolute joke.

    The prolonged hot weather we are having has gotten to people’s heads; Where is Radio Raheem busting out ‘Fight The Power’ when you need him?

    wukfit
    Member

    Yes, but my point is that as extremely good riders racing at the sharp end they choose to ride 29ers.

    except at the WCDH ๐Ÿ˜†

    Premier Icon scotroutes
    Subscriber

    So – that Rapha jacket…

    Warm and lightweight down jacket for cyclists

    Warm, lightweight jacket using PrimaLoftยฎ ONE insulation

    hora
    Member

    at the sharp end they choose to ride 29ers.

    Again at risk of making a sweeping generalisation, are you talking for all pro riders here? Pro riders are paid.

    Yes it’d impact on their performance if they rode the wrong bike but I wonder in history how many pro riders were PAID to ride bikes they really didn’t like?

    atlaz
    Member

    Is that real or quoted weight? Shimano (and Campag) do at least normally provide accurate claimed weights – FSA are notorious for being “optimistic”.

    That’s weighed on my (probably not totally accurate but not THAT inaccurate) kitchen scales. I went a bit special when I was building my Chinese carbon bike and weighed everything until I got to the cables and outers and bar tape then I gave up.

    Premier Icon jameso
    Subscriber

    loco, just a picture I took at Eurobike sorry, filed in the Eurobollocks section )

    (not saying the bikes won’t ride ok and liteville / syntace generally get a big thumbs-up for good kit)

    Premier Icon aracer
    Subscriber

    Again at risk of making a sweeping generalisation, are you talking for all pro riders here? Pro riders are paid.

    Er, did you miss the bit in my original comment about these riders where I referred to them as juniors?

    Premier Icon jameso
    Subscriber

    I know I’ve said it before but 29’ers tend to be ridden by middle-aged males, ‘looking for something’ (in their lives).

    I’m looking for something, aren’t we all? but I doubt my wheel choice expresses it )

    ‘projectionism’?

    Premier Icon chakaping
    Subscriber

    I was gonna nominate Liteville for their odd-wheel-size bikes.

    Why carry one spare inner tube on a ride when you can carry two?

    Apparently there’s a new trend (or marketing push) in the US for “gravel road” bikes. I suppose “fire road mincers” doesnt sound so intrepid…

    http://www.bikeradar.com/mtb/gear/article/trail-tech-defining-the-gravel-race-bike-37582/

    Saccades
    Member

    loco, just a picture I took at Eurobike sorry, filed in the Eurobollocks section )

    (not saying the bikes won’t ride ok and liteville / syntace generally get a big thumbs-up for good kit)

    Madelk (liteville distributors in ireland) have some stuff on their facebook page about it and piccies too.

    ndthornton
    Member

    i’ve been saying this for years: bikes, as an engineering problem, have been solved.

    +1
    apart from 2 glaring omissions…..
    Gearboxes
    long travel single crown inverted forks (although X-fusion have a nice looking prototype)

    after this bike companies – your work is done.
    So no more hollow, 29in saddles please as I have enough already.

    Premier Icon Northwind
    Subscriber

    mudsoul – Member

    Anything “enduro specific”.

    That does nark me… Half the reason enduro is so popular is that it’s just the sort of riding lots of people want to do, on the bikes we already own. “Rnduro specific” is just a prick’s way of saying “Normal stuff for normal riding”

    timbo678
    Member

    Companies trying to improve products to increase profits shocker…struggling to understand why this is so difficult for everyone to comprehend, regardless of wheel size or any other innovation (even a .000001% increase is an improvement)…no one is forcing you to buy it

    Also…unlikely a marketing bod is going to say ‘Well it does make a difference but not a lot’

    Wake up a smell the roses chaps…if someone wants to but it all then let them crack on it is their money

    Junkyard
    Member

    .no one is forcing you to buy it

    Are you new here?

    Can I have an orange 5 26 er please?

    crikey
    Member

    I must admit to having a little chuckle at this thread; if anyone wanted to know what to sell to middle aged men, this site would be an ideal starting point. From kitchen knives, coffee makers, coffee, beer, shoes, wellies, and on into the minutiae of bicycle design, it’s a bloody gold mine.

    To then sit and read folk criticising the latest attempts to sell you stuff is ironic in the extreme.

    Basically, this is a monster we/you’ve created; it’s not aimed at people buying cheap bikes from Halfords or a supermarket, it’s all for you. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Can I have an orange 5 26 er please?

    Yep, Drakes Cycles in Leeds have a few in, they’re even discounted. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    http://www.drakescycles.co.uk/m1b114s1p3511/ORANGE_Five_Pro_Kashima_-_Neon_Orange_%282013%29

    atlaz
    Member

    Apparently there’s a new trend (or marketing push) in the US for “gravel road” bikes. I suppose “fire road mincers” doesnt sound so intrepid…

    Basically it’s a cross bike. Or a road bike with bigger tyres.

    The result – according to a growing number of companies – is that it is once again time to increase the clamp diameter to bolster the interface between the stem and our rangy handlebars

    Something is making me think the industry is just looking for new and increasingly desperate ways to part us with our cash. I’m cynical by nature though

    brakes
    Member

    there’s a new trend (or marketing push) in the US for “gravel road” bikes

    isn’t there a race series in the US for gravel road bikes?
    is the UK equivalent ‘bridleway bikes’ or ‘fire road bikes’?
    I thought that’s what 29ers were for?

    the industry is just looking for new and increasingly desperate ways to part us with our cash. I’m cynical by nature though

    that’s not cynicism, that’s stone cold fact.

    Premier Icon chakaping
    Subscriber

    Basically it’s a cross bike. Or a road bike with bigger tyres.

    No, they couldn’t possibly work. People need to buy another new bike instead.

    35mm Bars

    Yes, I thought Easton had quietly dropped this daftness but then in the Eurobike pics there’s loads of them.

    ๐Ÿ™„

Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 181 total)

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