Viewing 40 posts - 121 through 160 (of 199 total)
  • Creating little ones
  • Houns
    Full Member

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    NewRetroTom

    Subscriber
    given procreating is the biggest single impact you can have on the planet

    True that – your child may be the one who solves the problem of building a nuclear fusion reactor and hence unlimited free power without polution and the ability to reverse global warming.

    Ah what happens when everyone has the same daft thought?

    perchypanther

    Member
    A question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    Bit of a selfish reason to have kids, forcing your care upon them, what if they don’t want to? Anyways, plenty of selfish folk out there will still have kids so there won’t be any shortage of carers when little Billy or Jenny decide that solving nuclear fusion isn’t for them.

    johndoh
    Free Member

    drove all her shit to her parent’s house

    Must. Resist.

    kittyr
    Free Member

    A question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    Dick question.

    Who is going to look after YOU if your kid decides to go and live in Oz? Or you have a child who is never going to be able to live independently? (not all pregnancies result in healthy babies) Or maybe your kid turns out to just be a little toe rag and you don’t get on?

    Have children because you want to, not because you think they will owe you anything in your old age. Such a shitty attitude, like you own them or they owe you something for deciding that you quite fancied a shag and a kid.

    Anyway, back to the OP:
    How long does it take? Can be the first unprotected shag or it can never happen, and anything in between. Good luck!
    Like another poster said, miscarriages are very normal – especially at the early stage.

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    convert
    Full Member

    Dick question.

    Some of you are gullible fools. Look at who posted the response you are replying too. Have a count back to how many serious posts has ever made. It was a joke!

    perchypanther
    Free Member

    ….and that, kiddies, is how you prove that most people don’t read the whole thread before responding.

    ossify
    Full Member

    Pretty good response for your lazy half-hearted troll though. Let’s hope you don’t become pro 😉

    P-Jay
    Free Member

    A question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    If my parents are sliding into old age safe in the knowledge I’ll look after them when they’re too old to look after themselves, they’re in for a shock.

    If you want my advice, if you want to be looked after in old age, stay fit, stay wealthy. Ironically not having kids will help that.

    weeksy
    Full Member

    If you want my advice, if you want to be looked after in old age, stay fit, stay wealthy. Ironically not having kids will help that.

    Yes but this thread has shown that you may be wealthy, but you’ll be a miserable cretin a long time before that.

    Some of you on here are miserable buggers

    Houns
    Full Member

    Not miserable, just not selfish

    P-Jay
    Free Member

    The missus has decided that now is the time to have sproglets. Bit of a leap of faith and what not. Anyway, just wondering if any of you did anything different to usual and how long it took until you’d conceived?

    Do you want to have kids? If not, say now it’ll be horrible, but easier than having kids.

    I wasn’t involved in the planning stage so can’t help you with the rest of it.

    I’d say prepare yourself. When it’s good, it’s really great, when it’s bad it can seem like an impossible task with no end, there are times I would have gladly swapped with that geezer who pushed a big boulder up hill every day, only for it to roll down again every night, at least he knew where he was and what he had to do.

    When ours was tiny she didn’t sleep for more than 3 hours on the bounce for 5 months, so I didn’t sleep for more than 3 hours on the bounce for 3 months. It aged me terribly and I’ve never really recovered. You’ll be begging for a nights sleep and you’ll think that that first time you get 7 hours you’ll awake feeling brand new, nope it’ll take weeks to feel human again.

    It doesn’t matter how many parents tell you how wonderful it all is, you have to accept a LOT of downsides.

    Financially it’s crippling don’t worry about nappies and food, it’s a drop in the ocean Full Time Childcare if you / your partner want to return after Maternity Leave £900 a month, childcare vouchers can help. Someone will no doubt soon tell me that you shouldn’t have kids if you are only going to stick them with a childminder 5 days a week, well **** them and their condescending attitude, sometimes it’s possible to have a stay at home parent, sometimes it ain’t and it’s no one business but your own.

    You want to buy a elaborate pram for about £500 that you’ll never use, people will be queuing up to sell you shit to make your life easier, none of it works.

    That’s assuming you don’t want/need to move for space / schools etc, then you’ll realise why 1 house can cost £150k and one down the road £300k when they look the same. You can rage against those horrible people who think this school is good and this one bad (it’s because people don’t want their kids going to school with poor people) sadly so many people play the game it actually makes bad schools bad, it’s **** up.

    Emotionally it’ll wreck you, Babies will at times get ill, they’ll go bright red, scream and get a temp, you’ll assume it’s an emergency, sometimes it is, sometimes it isn’t, there’s no way of telling really. Make friends with your Doctor and their receptionist. If there response to a call with a sick baby (6 months and younger) is anything other than “come down we’ll be waiting for you” sack them off for better ones.

    People will tell you the first week, fortnight, month, 3 months, 6 months, year, 2 years, 5 years are the hardest – they’re all right, but what they don’ t means is the first first week, fortnight, month, 3 months, 6 months, year, 2 years, 5 years are the hardest and then it’s easy because it’s not – I will say when they start FT school (which is a total head**** in itself) things to really quiet down for a few years – Our eldest was a breeze from about 4 to 10, he’s been a nightmare since he started High School… 3 years ago.

    Drac
    Full Member

    Holidays on a beach in the sun, because who wants an active holiday in rainy UK?

    Not those with no kids who can take cheap deals and have more holidays in the sun.

    richmtb
    Full Member

    I was a bit glib earlier, but all I’ll say is good luck OP. Hopefully you have no issues getting the missus pregnant but its increasingly common to have problems.

    Our little one appeared after 2 rounds of IVF.

    She is five now and the best thing that ever happened to me, I love being a dad.

    9 out of 10 meal times though I wish I could swap her for a Labrador 😉

    chestrockwell
    Full Member

    We have quite a few mates that took a while to conceive (Between 1 and 5 years trying) so we decided to be less careful sooner than we might have done. Typically I hit the target within a week. We didn’t learn our lesson and repeated the same trick with number two so I didn’t even get to enjoy the prolonged fertility stage.

    Moral of the story is that you can obsess about fertility cycles and the right time, diet, blah, blah, but it might make no difference. Just make sure you are ready for her to tell you in a couple of weeks you’re going to be a Dad!

    binners
    Full Member

    Moral of the story is that you can obsess about fertility cycles and the right time, diet, blah, blah, but it might make no difference. Just make sure you are ready for her to tell you in a couple of weeks you’re going to be a Dad!

    I was going to add a similar comment. We had the same. I just assumed that seeing as I declared war on my body when I was 18 and spent the next decade+ drinking like Alex Higgins, trying to ram the entire contents of Bolivia up my nostrels and seeing if it was possible to exist on a completely kebab-based diet, that after over a decade of that the chances of easy conception were slim.

    I was wrong. It was pretty much immediate.

    Even more bizarrely, they emerged with all their limbs in the right places, and are now (at 15 and 13) bright, healthy, well-adjusted kids.

    To all those who’ve struggled, I can only apoligise for the injustice of it all. Life really isn’t fair

    matt_outandabout
    Full Member

    Future congratulations to the OP.

    As a warning.
    We managed a one hit conception.
    Three times.

    Book mark the snip thread for future reference.

    bikebouy
    Free Member

    Yes but this thread has shown that you may be wealthy, but you’ll be a miserable cretin a long time before that.

    Wealth has nothing to do with being a miserable cretin, this thread (and others on here) prove that.

    So, flawed statement.

    lister
    Full Member

    Genuine tip: your wife should take plenty of folic acid as it hugely reduces the chances of spinal problems like spina bifida.

    She should start dosing before you start trying though.

    funkmasterp
    Full Member

    I had kids for the sole purpose of destroying the world. I ensure that they only use single use plastics, always have the heating on high (with windows open) and to eat twice their body weight in meat every, single, day.

    Any other top tips for raising world eaters?

    TedC
    Full Member

    Another question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Is it cos you don’t want anyone else to play with your Lego/Airfix?

    It’s certainly a reason, but not the only one.

    ransos
    Free Member

    If you want my advice, if you want to be looked after in old age, stay fit, stay wealthy. Ironically not having kids will help that.

    If enough people follow your advice, your old age is guaranteed to be miserable. Old people consume resources that young people provide… So those claiming to be concerned about the environment should do the decent thing and take a one way trip Switzerland. By train, obvs.

    larrydavid
    Free Member

    Good luck op.

    Just get wired in.

    I’ve found being a parent has made me profoundly happy. For me it has given my life a clear purpose. Not the reasons we did it but that is the outcome. It is 1 million times better than not having kids

    It is hard, you will be poorer, but it is amazing.

    ransos
    Free Member

    Anyway, OP: I don’t regret it for a second. A new world of joy awaits you.

    slackalice
    Free Member

    I’ve lost count due to the comedic value of some of these posts, however IIRC, defensive parent posts are outnumbering the miserable childless eco warrior posts.

    “Best thing I/we ever did…” Oh yeah?…. Say it often enough… 😉

    ayjaydoubleyou
    Full Member

    Turned out we’d been ‘trying” for longer than I’d realised. Seems to be more common than you’d hoped.

    I’m reading this as your missus had been attempting to conceive before you knew about it.

    Lying about use of contraceptives/fertility such as to have unprotected sex with someone is classed as rape is it not?
    Jason Lawrence convicted of rape for falsely stating he had had a vasectomy prior to otherwise consensual sex. Link: https://www.standard.co.uk/news/crime/matchcom-serial-rapist-gets-extra-jail-time-after-five-more-victims-come-forward-a4253691.html (not his only crime, and he does seem like a piece of work)

    poah
    Free Member

    how long it took until you’d conceived?

    within the month that she decided she wanted kids.

    Make sure you actually want kids too – “missus has decided that now is the time” doesn’t sound like you are really wanting them.

    ratherbeintobago
    Full Member

    What if you need a kidney, eh?

    Which is as good a time as any to suggest we should all consider whether we’d want to be organ donors in the event of our deaths, if so, sign the Organ Donor Register and tell your loved ones of your decision #PassItOn

    Kryton57
    Full Member

    “Best thing I/we ever did…” Oh yeah?….

    I can’t recall if your a parent or not slackalice.  Assuming not and for those that aren’t, I believe most of us truly believe that statement.   Yes, it’s the hardest job in the work but yes, it’s also the most rewarding.  If people have watched thier kids grow up you should know how rewarding it is.

    epicyclo
    Full Member

    slackalice
    I’ve lost count due to the comedic value of some of these posts, however IIRC, defensive parent posts are outnumbering the miserable childless eco warrior posts.

    “Best thing I/we ever did…” Oh yeah?…. Say it often enough… 😉

    Said it 4 times and continue to mean it. 🙂

    slackalice
    Free Member

    I’m a step parent Kryton. From when he was 4 to now at nearly 17.

    molgrips
    Free Member

    However, those that I know who have kids almost any sense of reason or ecological consciousness goes straight out the window.

    Not entirely what I meant. I am talking about considering the consequences of your actions and caring about people you don’t know.

    olly2097
    Free Member

    I’ll join in.

    Hardest job in world.
    Can be awful.
    Aged badly.
    Been tired for over 5 years now.
    Money vampires

    Best thing I’ve done with my life.

    Before I had no purpose. Now, I currently feel like I have one.

    It’s nice to be needed and idolised, and to love and idolise back with someone you created.

    For what it’s worth: I asked for kids for three years before we had them

    Let’s face it, all those who dont want kids and are against the idea, fair enough. But a high majority of you have dog babies.

    MoreCashThanDash
    Full Member

    ayjaydoubleyou – it might be a lot of things, but rape is definitely not one of them

    DT78
    Free Member

    well my 4year old told me he was getting married when I picked him up from school. much chuckling. made a shit day better.

    convert
    Full Member

    You know how most people recommend the bike they own – that. I think we are programmed to make the best of whatever comes our way especially when it was a big commitment there is no going back from. We are more adaptable than we may think we are. I bet there are load of breeders that could have had really enjoyable lives without them and having run their lives again would reflect they had made the right choice childless too. Similarly those that are barren and proud who could have adapted into fulfilled parents. It is only the completely entrenched with a lack of self analysis that can’t see they might still have been happy if they took another route and there are pros and cons to each. Those who chose to be parents who seems to be personally insulted when someone else explains why they chose not to and why it works for them are just intellectually subnormal or have very fragile self esteem.

    My only two gripes are those that have kids because it is the next thing on the conservative (small C) to do list without any navel gazing about if they will be any good at it and also are in a position of stability and financial security to do it well. The ones that are ‘shocked’ at childcare costs when they get to that stage and don’t know how they will be able to manage then get the arse with their parents for not dropping everything to do it for free – do your homework and negotiating before you divs! It’s not like there were not literally millions of people you could have talked to first. And then there are those people who do more than self replicate. Third and forth children should involve culling one of the first two attempts (you have to choose between one of the first two – I’d choose the one that looked like they might need a professional taxi service for 16 years to every club in existance or showed signs of wanting to play the recorder).

    hammy7272
    Free Member

    I think P-j summaries nicely.

    Everyone says before you have kids it’s hard. I tried to prepare but they were wrong it is way harder than you can imagine once in the depths of it all. We’ve two aged 3 and 5 now and it has been very tough. However, it is amazing. Very hard to adjust as you realise there is no going back and you are responsible for another life. Incredible really.

    Just crack on with the bonking and enjoy. 😎

    DezB
    Free Member

    OP significant by his absence. Lit the blue touch paper, shut the laptop and got busy.

    tomhoward
    Full Member

    I came here to suggest a romantic weekend in Centre Parcs. See the joke has already been made.

    As you were.

    brokenbanjo
    Full Member

    Cheers everyone. Figured better off asking real people rather than looking at the rubbish you find on the web.
    Re the ‘she decided’ part, I came to peace with the fact that if we were to have kids, it’s her choice when, not mine.

    convert
    Full Member

    He’s back – great!

    Got to ask about the username – that not going to be an issue bearing in mind the task you have ahead?

    Edukator
    Free Member

    Letting someone else make the decision that will most affect the rest of your life is asking for pain. If you’re that disinterested donate to a sperm bank instead.

Viewing 40 posts - 121 through 160 (of 199 total)

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