Creating little ones

Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 199 total)
  • Creating little ones
  • Premier Icon Drac
    Subscriber

    This thread is peak STW condescending arsehole central.

    And rising.

    willard
    Member

    You could be lucky first time, or it could take years and many failed (and really sad) pregnancies. The worst part is not being able to really influence the outcome in any way.

    Just be aware that pregnancy/kids do not help bring couples together. You need to be solid as a partnership before starting on the journey because, in all likelihood, you’re going to be stressed AF during the process and tired and stressed for a long time afterwards. It can, and does, change people and expose parts of their personality that you never knew about.

    Good luck though, I hope you get a BanjoJnr (ukalele?) that will make both of you happy for years to come.

    Premier Icon bikebouy
    Subscriber

    You could try spending all your savings on IVF the f the natural cause and effect doesn’t work.

    Premier Icon csb
    Subscriber

    Assuming the mechanics all work (and be prepared for possible dissapointment there) it might be an idea to sit down and work out if offspring will be a) affordable or b) resented forever.

    Ro5ey
    Member

    Go for meals, go to the cinema (back row?), go on holiday, lie in on a saturday/sunday morning, go on holiday, leave the house without having to plan it, ride your bike, have free time and go on holiday

    All those things are fine and dandy but having kids is better.

    Watched my lad run the mid-field and score a wonder goal at the weekend, he overcame his fear of tackling in rugby and then did a brilliant brilliant no look pass at basketball…. That’s entertainment !! …… While is big sis got a merit in school for selflessly helping a classmate… made us feel we’re doing something right

    Good luck

    Have fun 😉

    tjagain
    Member

    Oxytocin. Preventing infanticide since the beginning of time

    Premier Icon duncancallum
    Subscriber

    This thread is peak STW condescending arsehole central.

    And rising.

    And did anyone expect anything else?

    BaronVonP7
    Member

    10 Pence
    10 Pence
    50 Pence
    Pound.

    nealglover
    Member

    Go to Torquay…..worked for me.

    France worked for me.

    Avoid Center Parcs though. That won’t work.

    petec
    Member

    On a vaguely sensible answer.

    Read Sperm Wars

    https://www.academia.edu/31191375/SPERM_WARS_Infidelity_Sexual_Conflict_and_Other_Bedroom_Battles

    How the subconscious works; learn to read when she’s fertile etc.

    And on a slightly too much detail front, it helps if she has an orgasm afterwards. All to do with the cervix dipping in the pool of semen, and drawing it up into the uterus. https://www.sharecare.com/health/gynecology/biological-reason-female-orgasm

    Told you!

    toby1
    Member

    I read the news and decided against it. Can’t say recent news has changed my point of view at all.

    Each to their own though.

    Premier Icon NewRetroTom
    Subscriber

    given procreating is the biggest single impact you can have on the planet

    True that – your child may be the one who solves the problem of building a nuclear fusion reactor and hence unlimited free power without polution and the ability to reverse global warming.

    Premier Icon fazzini
    Subscriber

    Damn good chance OP your good lady has mentioned “its a good time” as she is already ‘enroute’ and was testing your reaction… Well, that was my experience anyway 🤣 🤣

    avdave2
    Member

    First one took 2 years next time it was 2 with the first shot!

    TiRed
    Member

    Ignore the above. Kids are great. To maximise your conception chances, it helps to try when your partner is most fertile, and it’s not as long as you think (but mercifully not the day or so a year for pandas).

    It could be first time or it could be never happen. After a year of no success, seek medical assistance.

    They take all your time, space and money, and your life is never the same again. It’s much better. My two have survived to adulthood and they still seem to like me.

    Edukator
    Member

    There was much discussion with Madame. On balance we thought that we could cope with one, and that just one would add more to our lives than it would take away (the selfish bit). Then we considered the life the child would have, would it be a happy life and a contribution to society. We thought that where and how we live that was possible (the non selfish bit).

    We cleaned up our act, no drink or medication of any kind for a while and then stopped using condoms, and it was literally first time lucky, he’s 22 today.

    Another vote for ‘don’t do it from me’.

    Mine are ace and I wouldn’t be without them but deffo makes your life far, far worse. (Makes your wife’s life far worse as well, not sure why they can’t see that.)

    If it has to happen there are some amazing times so don’t be too despondant, but basically, avoid it.

    Premier Icon Kryton57
    Subscriber

    Another vote for ‘don’t do it from me’.

    Mine are ace and I wouldn’t be without them but deffo makes your life far, far worse. (Makes your wife’s life far worse as well, not sure why they can’t see that.)

    If it has to happen there are some amazing times so don’t be too despondant, but basically, avoid it.

    I find this perspective amazing.   No matter what our kids have “taken away” from us be it money, sleep, material objects etc, I love them and their impact on us to death and wouldn’t consider my life being worse with them – YMMV of course.   I cannot understand this attitude at all.

    he’s 22 today.

    Happy Birthday to Edukator Jnr!

    Premier Icon DezB
    Subscriber

    The missus has decided that now is the time to have sproglets

    None of you clever know what right for other people and the planet etc types have mentioned the obvious… it should be equally desired by both parties.
    Can we just check this is the case before we go on?

    Premier Icon moonsaballoon
    Subscriber

    What nobeer and  weeksy said , you don’t want kids , fine but why comment on a thread where a guy is asking advice on having kids ?

    For what it’s worth OP my mrs laid on her back for 20 mins after the dirty deed , old wives tail maybe but we were lucky that it seemed to happen quite easy for us

    Don’t listen to the doom mongers. To increase the population you have to have 4 kids, 2, replace you, a third to maintain the population to make up for those who don’t have kids and a 4th (well actually part of a 4th) to grow the population – how many people do your know with four or more kids? I know one couple so it’s hardly rife. As more and more of the world is coming out of poverty as more and more countries are becoming developed those in the birth rates in the developing. WOrld is dropping off dramatically as people do don’t need to have lots of kids and can’t Afford them. So overpopulation Is not a risk at all so if you want kids have ‘em.

    Premier Icon NewRetroTom
    Subscriber

    For the folk saying “don’t have kids” I’m quite interested in the reasons for this.
    Are they fundamentally misanthropic?
    If you have kids and you raise them they are quite likely to be a lot like you and your partner. Do you think that you and your partner have a net negative impact on society? If so then fair enough, don’t have kids.
    For those who don’t want kids because they are bad for the planet – for whom are you saving the planet?

    Edukator
    Member

    Thanks Kryton!

    In terms of adding:

    I got to meet lots of good people: his school mates, their parents, his university mates and their parents, his girlfriends, his clubmates – and we do/did interesting stuff with them

    I skied more than I would have done as he started racing.

    We did more cycling – kidiback tandem across Europe, then VTT then he joined our club

    We went to more concerts, because he was playing

    In terms of headaches:

    14 to 18 was challenging

    Madame will no doubt work a bit longer to pay his rent in expensive places but she likes her job and refuses the idea of early retirement and making do on savings.

    Premier Icon jonesyboy
    Subscriber

    Love mine to bits, be prepared for a rollercoaster. See https://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/16-year-old-son-smoking-weed/page/6/

    It’s a shame the world isn’t a better place to bring kids up, and every change seems to add more complications.

    Premier Icon bikebouy
    Subscriber

    fine but why comment

    Two sides to every argument/discussion innit.

    Even some of those who have had kids recommend not having them, some of those without kids recommend not having them and vice-versa.

    Like anything in life, always opponents and opposing views.

    Just passing on the realities…

    But you knew all that, didn’t you.

    A question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    Premier Icon weeksy
    Subscriber

    Mine are ace and I wouldn’t be without them but deffo makes your life far, far worse. (Makes your wife’s life far worse as well, not sure why they can’t see that.)

    MAkes life worse ? What the holy F…. Couldn’t be any further from my experience

    Premier Icon timbog160
    Subscriber

    Feels like your request for advice may be a little, ahem, premature.

    Good luck. For something which starts off as fun it can get surprisingly stressful but is worth it in the end LOL.

    olly2097
    Member

    moonsaballoon

    Subscriber
    What nobeer and weeksy said , you don’t want kids , fine but why comment on a thread where a guy is asking advice on having kids ?

    For what it’s worth OP my mrs laid on her back for 20 mins after the dirty deed , old wives tail maybe but we were lucky that it seemed to happen quite easy for us

    Cause they’ve got the time to browse the forum to do so instead of picking food off the walls and killing the planet like the rest of us wrong ‘uns.

    I find this perspective amazing. No matter what our kids have “taken away” from us be it money, sleep, material objects etc, I love them and their impact on us to death and wouldn’t consider my life being worse with them – YMMV of course. I cannot understand this attitude at all

    Isnt it. It’s the worst job at times but ultimately fulfilling and I love living vicariously through my climate damaging sprogs. High chance that if you love them like they love you then you’ll probably not die alone either.

    As for Op: just bang away. Our first 8 kids took about 3 months each to conceive. It’ll happen when it happens.

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    Great thread this 🙂

    The planet is on it’s arse because of over population, just get her to give you a good ole hand shandy instead.

    You can have up to two kids and still not be contributing to overpopulation.

    But another (somewhat more arrogant) perspective is that the kind of conscientious values that are held by people who are worried about their impact on the planet are exactly the kind of values we need to be propagated in society in order to save it.

    Premier Icon bearnecessities
    Subscriber

    A question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    That’s a joke. Isn’t it?

    Premier Icon kilo
    Subscriber

    A question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    An economic migrant most likely. If I had kids not sure I’d want to balls their life up looking after me (I currently have a dad with early dementia and a Mad Irish Mother (this an actual thing rather than a descriptor))

    Premier Icon pondo
    Subscriber

    Who’s going to care for you when you are no longer able to care for yourself?

    I think that’s a bad reason to have kids.

    That’s a joke. Isn’t it?

    Do I strike you as the type to make jokes?

    Premier Icon moonsaballoon
    Subscriber

    Two sides to every argument/discussion innit.

    Does there have to be ? The OP was asking for advice and experiences of conceiving yet he got a load of responses from people justifying their life choices and people who don’t know him trying to convince him not to have kids .

    but you knew all that, didn’t you

    I always imagine responses like that said in a kind of nasally whiny voice

    Premier Icon doomanic
    Subscriber

    Don’t expect it to be easy; after 5 miscarriages I was ready to give up as the emotional toll on my wife was almost too much to bear and it wasn’t easy on me either. Sex became a chore; following the calendar and thermometer. It almost broke us.

    We persevered though and our son is 21 this year.

    Premier Icon DezB
    Subscriber

    That’s a joke. Isn’t it?

    Hmm… who typed it?

    Another  question for the ” Don’t have kids” brigade….

    What if you need a kidney, eh?

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