Three mates of mine went sharesies on a greyhound some years ago. They had all sorts of stupid names for it but the racing commission kept turning them down till they struck on Nads Revenge. It helped that one of their surnames was Nadsille (or something)

Anyhoo … fast forward to the mut’s first race and picture my mates, pissed as parrots and dressed in dinner suits, down at the start line. Dogs go off and they start shouting: “Go Nads!! Go Nads!!”

Mohammed?

Mohammed

I used to have a dog called Mohammed.

Didn’t pay much for him, kept him for a while and then sold him for a prophet.

my aunt took in a local cat (it kinda decided it liked living with her family and moved itself in )

her son (my cousin) named it Minge

My aunt used to call it in from the garden

everyone in the family knew what it meant except her, so always found it most amusing, didn’t tell her what it meant for around 3 years

“minge, minge, come here minge”

I had a Japanese Akita called Barney

Best to choose a name that goes (comically) well with your surname so that when they call it’s name at the Vet’s, everyone gets a laugh

I know of a cat called Wilson (named after Brian not Harold).

We had a sheep dog called ratatouille, because she was young at the time and was annoying the cattle in the yard and Dad just shouted it out at her in frustration!

My friends just got a lovely little black cocker spaniel and the first time I heard it’s name I thought he’d said Winston, I comically thought of the chill Winston line from Lenny Henry, reused in lock stock, it turns out I’d misheard and it’s actually Wilton. Thinking about it, it makes sense as he sells carpets!

My own dogs are named Louis and Elle, a bit of a play on the French for him and her, (they are Dad and daughter.)

@ slowoldman is it owned by a bloke called Bob by any chance?

Dan will be my dog’s name when I get one.
Dan, Dan, Dan, DAN, DAN, DAN, DAN!, DAN!

Hand Banana
The Enforcer
Or
Spaghetti

Got to be Pat

Our dog answers to Barky Bollocks, although she’s called Juno (and her pedigree name is Gypsy Mermaid).

We had a dog called Elwood, and a cat called Brian.

My miniature daschund is called Dave. Seems to suit him somehow. The collies are Max and Roy.

Our lab is called Ronnie. Name given to him by his previous owner and he was 4 when we got him so thought him too old to change it.

No idea why he was called Ronnie.

We’ve also got a guinea pig called Haga, after the ex WOrld Superbike rider Noriyuki Haga. They don’t look like one another.

Is dissapoint. 😐 No one linked these. 🙁 What is stw coming to? 😥

Fenton

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GRSbr0EYYU[/video]

Shithead

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZHHmeAwZx4[/video]

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=howO-wo7XOM&feature=player_detailpage[/video]

Our mini schnauzer cross is Vinnie, but other suggestions from my boys were Mr Snuggles and Hairy Barry.

My aging Labrador/ staff cross is called Bacon.

Bought a Border Collie pup last year which did nothing but bite the Mrs for the first month so almost called him “Suarez”.

I used to work at a coach garage that took in a stray jack Russell and called it Bolllocks, which was more amusing when one of the fitters decided to take him home one weekend, he got into next doors garden and his wife had to go out and shout for bollocks.

Late father in law used to have a greyhound called Brian, a neighbour had a Bichon Frisee called Frank & I had a dog of indeterminate breed called Lucy (mostly collie), which was the smartest dog I’ve ever known and still miss her after 30 years.

My next dog will be called Pat.

A friend had two dogs one called ‘nosebag’ and the other one ‘Oi’. All dogs should be called Oi!

We have a Whippet called Walter.

My old dog, a Staffy cross was called Deefa. Current dog is small and black and called Cilla. Next dog will probably be called Pavlov.

Zombiemaggot.

Brother in law’s dopey labrador is called ‘Derp’

I used to have a dog called Blacksmith.
Whenever I kicked him up the arse, he made a bolt for the door.

I did have blue merle called Rover. Best dog in the world. Known my many of my friends at R.T.D (Rover the Dog)

At my local vet’s when it’s your turn to go in your pet’s name is called out by the receptionist , the yoof next to me called his dog “spliff”.

Jimi Houndrix

Friend has a dog called “Fell”. Triggered a massive police search of the local woods when a walker thought they heard the shout “Help!”.

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/dog-walker-sparks-major-search-2278292
(The Sun got the dog’s name right but I can’t find the link)

Resulted in a local radio station phone-in and Twitter-frenzy on stupid dog names.

When we got our wonderful mutt (Brân) I wanted to call him ‘Deefur’ so he would be Deefur Dog.

My 80yr old very straight laced church going aunt sees nothing wrong with her dog being called “Muff”, we all call the poor thing Colin.

We have a St Bernard called Vernon…

And a goldfish called Michael J Fox.

My next dog will be called Timber

there is a golden retriever on my post delivery called Biffer…. will eat anything

Old work mate called his dog Taxi. Stood in middle of field, woods, on mountain etc calling TAXI!

For maximum vets waiting room mirth, I will call my future pets Mango and Brandon. Surname Pickles.

labrador called picnic – as every walk we go on it eats any dogsh1t around, hence life is a continuous picnic