I see the other day that ‘gun for hire’ Gayle slogged some Bangladeshi medium pacer for six from the first ball of a five day test the other day. He’s the first person to ‘achieve’ this.

He then went on to make a magnificent and game-changing 24 before holing out.

I really hope the bowler told him to go forth and multiply and his team mates went beserk at him.

It’s a real shame that someone as talented as Gayle has become the cricket equivalent of a trick-shot snooker player or golfer.

Too much money in the game, too many agents, too much style over substance. All these mean that some talented players can ignore the mental side of the game and just tee-off from ball one by restricting themselves to T20 and cameo’s elsewhere.

I’m sure if KP was opening all the time, he’d have managed this at some point – both the six and the holing out for a low score.

I don’t see what the opening bowler has to complain about – if you deliver a loose first ball, then getting it sent back over your head is fair play.

I remember when we used to get Beefy to open in one-dayers when they were still generally treated like mini test matches.

As an ex-opening bowler myself, I don’t think it’s wrong that your first ball is twatted out of the park if it’s total rubbish. It’s more the fact that Gayle made his mind up that he was just going out to have a slog on the first day of a Test whatever the impact on his team’s chances.

Actually, I find it surprising it hasn’t happened before – quickie bowls a bouncer first ball, batsman has an impulsive hook at it as he hasn’t ‘got his head on’ yet and top-edges it for six.

I’ve also no problem with an opener smashing it with a plan in mind. i remember Michael Slater hitting DeFreitas for 18(?) off the first over of an Ashes series at the Gabba. He calmed down a bit after that, but the gameplan was clear – hit the ‘steady’ DeFreitas off his line and length early on to gain an advantage.

It seems that Gayle just does what the hell he likes and damn the consequences.

I notice that the bowler, Gazi was a test debutant and an off-spinner. I hate to be nasty to Bangladesh, but if you open your attack with a new boy, and a spinner at that, then it’s not entirely surprising if any batting side has a go at that.

Doesn’t seem to have done the Windies any harm – 500-odd for four declared.

Blimey – fair enough then, I think.

That’s not a great message for your debutant off-spinner:

“Yeah, you can take the new pill – it’ll be fine”.

Over the years I played I noticed that a lot of spinners weren’t all that keen on sudden changes of plan or cock-ups.

My mate was a pretty good slow left-armer, but one day our captain cocked up the bowling plan to leave him having to bowl the last over against the most notorious slogger in our league. Ever since then, the joke has been “I don’t think the last ball of that over has landed yet”. It was about eight years ago, but the joke hasn’t worn thin. It went miles – still easily on the way up as it left the ground. No one even bothered to look for the ball

He actually took his boots off on the walk back to the pavillion and threw them into the seats at the front shouting “that’s f***ing it, I retire”. Genius.

It still hasn’t landed by the way. I hear they are serving in-flight drinks on it as well – strangely he still doesn’t see the funny side.

Gayle’s still a mercenary, though – and Pietersen’s a pillock.