- Carrying inappropriate things by bicycle- your horror stories let’s hear ’em
Spesh pizza rack ftw!
Added bonus was cars gave me lots of room for some reason?
Posted 2 months agowhite101Subscriber
I borrowed the OH cannondale HT years ago to collect our dogs ashes from the vet. Lots of hills and road action on a bloody hot day in June with a rather elaborate box containing a tub of cross staffy ashes made it all the way home squeezed inappropriately into a camelbakPosted 2 months ago
Always fish and chips after a ride with my mates as a kid/teenager, hooked over the bar end (oh yeah, judge my age!). Never ended in tears, but made for interesting steering.
I also used to like building balsa wood model planes, so quite a few sheets of balsa wood strapped to the top tube. So many other things I’ve just asked for some tape in the shop to put it on the top tube too, can’t remember what though.
Bolt croppers (the longest Toolstation had in stock after I locked myself out of the house by leaving keys in the garage).
I’ve used the kids trailer to transport bikes to the ex’s flat for rides.
BITD used what I seem to remember were called Roubaix wheel holders (my dad used to use them to transport his “good” wheels to TT’s) to take wheels to the bike shop.
Er, huge fireworks. Can be a challenge.
Basically, there is always a way, but I’ve notPosted 2 months agoStuFSubscriber
In Finale – I saw 2 people on different bikes carrying a large inflatable unicorn float between them – still fully inflatedPosted 2 months agokayak23Subscriber
There’s an old crusty dude round my manor who works as a window cleaner. Been a local institution for years. Wears a suit and pushes a cheap bso about with massive extending ladders across the top of the bike.
Never is riding the bike, just pushing the ladders on it. 😊Posted 2 months agotall_martinSubscriber
In edinburgh at one point you could by alcohol at vastly inflated price afte 10pm when all the normal off license had shut.
I’m 6”4 and borrowed my 5”0 mates bike to get some vodka.
The vodka went into the front wheel and smashed our hopes and dreams all over the street 😢Posted 2 months ago
[url=https://flic.kr/p/eq8oby]IMAG1014[/url] by neil.d.cox, on Flickr
[url=https://flic.kr/p/g5VUqz]IMAG1004[/url] by neil.d.cox, on Flickr
My truck broke down and I had some sheep on a neighbours ground down the road. The ewe had a bit of mastisis and needed treatment so she followed the lamb in the pannier back to the sheep shed. Carrying the hurdles was ok until you tried to corner…Posted 2 months ago
I love that Ute, here’s it setup for a lightweight bikepacking trip…Posted 2 months ago
[url=https://flic.kr/p/g5VMtt]IMAG1084[/url] by neil.d.cox, on FlickrIdleJonSubscriber
Not terribly inappropriate but I went fishing when I was a teenager with the rod tied to the top tube of my 10sp Raleigh. It was only at the first bend that I found I couldn’t turn left, only right.Posted 2 months agonealgloverMember
Pictorial Spoonerism ?
Posted 2 months agouniqueusernameSubscriber
I’ve carried one of those floor to ceiling aco prop style bike racks strapped to my top tube.
An empty snowboard bag strapped on my courier bag. It was one of the boxy ones with wheels that is designed for a couple of people’s kit. It was folded in half, but that is still something about a metre wide on my back. I had no way to check over my shoulders before manoeuvring in traffic. It was a mildly scary ride home.
A rubbish bin strapped to my courier bag. One of the black plastic outdoor ones we all had before Wheely bins. That journey was mostly along the towpath so no issues, but I got funny looks and comments.
Now I have a car so inappropriate cycle carriage is a thing for past.Posted 2 months agoscuttlerSubscriber
Love the Alps disassembled bike on back pic.Posted 2 months agowoodsterSubscriber
The lamb is my favourite!
When I was living in Holland we used to go on trips to Amsterdam or the coast in groups with a crate or two of beers bungee strapped to racks on a couple of bikes and when your beer ran out you simply rode to a beer bike and swapped it for a fresh one using the bottle opener placed in the crate. Of course drunken antics involved trying to get others to drop their beer and there was a devastating moment where the beer bike rider accelerated away into the back of another bike and the resulting crash lost about 8 beers.Posted 2 months ago
A shovel … stupidly at this point transferred across the bars until I tried going between 2 trees… you’d think it would be hard to forget you had the shovel but hey hoPosted 2 months agoPoopscoopSubscriber
Best thread for ages! Loving the pics… Apart from one obvs.Posted 2 months ago
These are all restoring my faith in human stupidity, I feel truly humbled, good work.
Forgot to mention I managed to cut my nipple with my rebar **** wit incidentPosted 2 months agomaccruiskeenSubscriber
Back in the early days of the Lidl / Aldi cycling specials- when the deals seemed to good to be true – it was funny seeing cyclists who’d impulsively splurged on too much cheap cycling gear trying to negotiate riding home with it 🙂Posted 2 months ago
These are all restoring my faith in human stupidity, I feel truly humbled, good work.
Forgot to mention I managed to cut my nipple with my rebar **** wit incident
Yeah. TBF I reckon the shovel is quite possibly the least inappropriate ..I still can’t work out how I could forget and try and ride between trees though… so I’m claiming the stupidity for the least inappropriate.Posted 2 months agotjagainSubscriber
I have done that in B&Q Bought too much stuff then had to go back in to buy sticky tape to fasten it to my bike as it wouldn’t go in my rucksacPosted 2 months agokimbersSubscriber
Pictorial Spoonerism ?
Jesus, how old is Peaty ?😉Posted 2 months ago
I have done that in B&Q Bought too much stuff then had to go back in to buy sticky tape to fasten it to my bike as it wouldn’t go in my rucksac
Far more frequently I buy too much stuff, and have to use all my domestique skills to stuff pockets and spare bottle cages with beer and wine. (don’t drink as much these days for various non-serious reasons, but it’s still often necessary).Posted 2 months agoTiRedSubscriber
As a student I cycled up Putney hill with a couple of pieces of flat packed furniture’s in a large rucksack. Very unstable. Of course it was not made.
That propane tank track stand is fabulous. I know why mine are so poor now!Posted 2 months agoicycleMember
5 litres of pink paint that fell off my rack. For years afterwards I’d drive past and be reminded of that day.
I also recall an OTB after getting a can of tuna stuck in my front spokes.Posted 2 months agoFB-ATBSubscriber
When I was working in Faversham I used to see a chap taking his kid to school by butchers bike. The child was sitting cross legged in the load area of the bike and the bloke was puffing away on a cigar as he pedalled!Posted 2 months agokcrMember
An entire business model based around carrying inappropriate things by bicycle:Posted 2 months ago
Great vid. Go Alfie!
I had a spell as a bike messenger in London and first job every day was going to a ’tile’ distributer in Battersea and delivering samples to architects allover the city/up to Camden. Basically, ‘we’re going to fill up your bag with bricks. Off you go’Posted 2 months ago
During school holidays I used to cycle seven miles each way to labour in a friend’s garden and one day I got the strange idea of leaving a trail, so I filled my Dad’s plant spray with water, roped it onto my rack and attached the spray so that it was sending a jet down onto the road and off I went. Teenagers do unfathomable things sometimes.Posted 2 months agoKlunkMember
in my early teens swimming kit in plastic bag hanging off the bars, went into the front wheel on the fastest hill in the village. I was propelled/tossed out of saddle like I was a caber landing on my head (according to an eye witness) I have no memory of it or the week following due to being hospitalized with serious concussion/temporary tourettes.Posted 2 months agomadmechanistSubscriber
3 ft breaker bar on a 24 inch top tube ..could steer both ways but turning circle was 1 1/2 metres..and at the same time some other tools in a pannier one of which was a screwdriver that punctured the bag narrowly missing my right upper leg..
Scariest load..another pair of wheels on the rear rack the wheels strikes were an absolute nightmare..and nearly had a van plough into one wheel on the back passing too close..Posted 2 months agodownshepSubscriber
Rode to school carrying a trombone in Primary 7, much to the annoyance of the music teacher (school trombone). It was cycling proficiency day and I also had a school orchestra rehearsal. No problem on a Puch Calypso with flat bars and Sturmey Archer 3 speed hub. The horror story was my brother snapping the trombone slide over his knees the following week.Posted 2 months agopadkinsonMember
As per his wishes, I rode the Claife Heights and Parkamoor loop with my dad’s ashes in a rucksack on a rainy day in January. The best non-breakable container we had was a plastic quality street jar, but it was slightly too big for the pack so stuck out of the top. Happily nothing went wrong, but christ he was heavy.Posted 2 months agopedladSubscriber
Cello. Regularly on the back of my BMX – 2 miles to school, along the roads, round the roundabouts. It was only a soft case too, but with rucksack type straps so why not.
Never did have a nightmare but it wouldn’t have taken much for it to result in a very awkward conversation with my dad about why I had a case full of splinters.Posted 2 months agoDezBSubscriber
Can’t believe fridge bloke didn’t fall off. Mental.Posted 2 months agosmiffyMember
I had a pack of beers across my pannier rack in France many years ago. I didn’t think much about the fact that it started to rain on the way back from le supermarche until the cardboard wrap dissolved and launched a load of stubbies into my back wheel. My mate was carrying the bread – same thing, less dramatic.Posted 2 months ago
On my way home from a ride today I carried a 12ft length of guttering across town liberated from the same skip I got the rebar from :o)
Incident free this time.
That Alfie and his T. W. A . T. bicycle odd job business is inspirational.Posted 2 months agojamesozSubscriber
Used to regularly carry an Angling seat box on the rack of my Raliegh Winner with the Rod bag over my shoulder. Until I decided I’d have just as nice a time if I left all the fishing crap in the shed.Posted 2 months ago
These days it’s most likely to be an inappropriate amount of beer carefully stored in my belly.robertpbSubscriber
A few years ago my uncle told me that his window cleaner decided to retire, he was still carrying a wooden ladder plus bucket on his bike.
He was 90 when he decided to call it a day. Respect.Posted 2 months agojamj1974Subscriber
All these make popping to the shop for my mum and getting a large bag of Tilda Basmati stuck in the front wheel, seem tame.Posted 2 months agomolgripsSubscriber
Most uncomfortable was an empty but large suitcase that I was returning to my parents’ house, as well as the rucksack that contained my own stuff for the trip. I had to ride about 5 miles to the station. The best way was to put it under my armpits but I could then only just reach the bars – pretty uncomfortable 5 miles that was.
Then there was the time me and three mates (I was 15) wanted to get a non-starting moped to his Gran’s farm which was about 8 miles away on country lanes. We tied three ropes to it so we could tow it, but someone had to steer it, but so he could get back he also needed a bike so one of the riders had to ride one handed whilst pushing the spare bike. This had a few problems – the person on the moped had to steer to keep tension in as many ropes as possible; but the riders also all had to keep the same pace otherwise the ropes would slacken. Also if the moped rider steered sideways, when tension was taken up it resulted in a hefty sideways tug on the seapost which was highly destabilising. Add to that the fact that our fitness levels varied a lot and it was basically just me towing a fat 12 year old on a moped whilst pushing a BMX and being clattered sideways by my mates. Took about three hours IIRC.
The other notable one was me carrying my mate and his bike along with our camping gear for the last couple of miles of a Polaris challenge in the early 90s.Posted 2 months ago
Rice all over the road…nightmare…I bet it covers the ground even better than maggots (see earlier post) :oDPosted 2 months ago
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