Where, in all of this, is little baby Johnson? Have you noticed there is literally nothing in the papers, no photos, no “look at how amazing Carrie looks after giving birth” articles…?
Is there some sort of injunction on it or a general “we’ll play nicely” agreement from the press not to hassle anyone about it? If it was a royal baby, we wouldn’t be able to get away from the little brat but here – it’s almost like there is no child at all…
Surely if you have a baby around the place, you don’t go spending £840/roll on wallpaper and £3000 coffee tables, you buy some wipe-clean stuff for when it’s flung it’s poo at you and then vomited over everything…?