Bloody awful motorbikes.

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  • Bloody awful motorbikes.
  • Premier Icon hot_fiat
    Subscriber

    Could be worse, you could be after a Harley, with a side car…

    I’d suggest finding one that doesn’t work. You can then look at it from the comfort of your padded cell safe in the knowledge that nobody will want to steal it while you recover.

    I had a VN1500 Drifter and it was pure class. Granted, the factory pipes were a bit asthmatic, but I solved that with some imports from the US and one of those dynatune thingumybobs. Sounded like, well, this actually:
    [video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOy34oqUJGA[/video]

    Turning circle of an oil tanker, but it was like sitting in an old Winchester lounge chair. Get one.

    Premier Icon Rusty Spanner
    Subscriber

    Why do I want another one?

    Old Brits – worn out, useless, vibratory pieces of shite.
    Leak more oil than the Amoco Cadiz, never run properly, crap lights.
    Ok as a boat anchor. Useless as transport.
    Done that. Never, ever again.

    Lambrettas – about as reliable as a hand grenade with the pin removed, slower than glacial drift and ridden by cider drinking inbreds in fake grass skirts.
    All aftermarket spares seemingly made from compressed cheese and a hatred of humanity.
    Guilty.

    East European stuff.
    Ridden originally because the owners couldn’t get anything better.
    Uglier than an anal prolapse. All the engineering subtlety of a flagging maul.
    I loved my old MZ and quite fancy a new Jawa.
    Or a Ural.

    And now, the final insult:
    I quite fancy a Jap cruiser.
    Possibly a VN800/900.
    All the class and style of a rotting badger combined with the comfort of a pair of thumbscrews.
    I know. Awful isn’t it?

    God help me.
    Is there a cure?
    Excorcism?

    I do love decent bikes too, but keep being drawn to the motorycling equivalent
    of herpes.

    Premier Icon Capt. Kronos
    Subscriber

    I know what you mean – I keep getting tempted by this one:

    Makes no sense what-so-ever, but I just kinda like the way it looks….

    mrmoofo
    Member

    I know what you mean – I keep getting tempted by this one:

    Makes no sense what-so-ever, but I just kinda like the way it looks….

    Don’t do it ! H-D may be crap but at least the Sportster has some kudo – a Virago has none!!

    Dickyboy
    Member

    On paper the VX800 ticked a load of boxes for me, in reality it was just shite & it wasn’t even pretending to be a Harley 🙂

    Old Brits – worn out, useless, vibratory pieces of shite.

    yes but some people are willing to pay stupid amounts of money for them

    Premier Icon Capt. Kronos
    Subscriber

    Oh – don’t worry, I won’t! If I was to go down that particular cul-de-sac it would be for one of these:

    Pigface
    Member

    To be honest in the right conditions any bike can make you feel amazing. I had this reinforced when riding through some Wiltshire lanes on an old XR200 that had asthma. The sun was out the road was quiet and it was one of those life affirming moments.

    Premier Icon vinnyeh
    Subscriber

    It’s good to talk.

    I wouldn’t worry, it seems as if you’re fully aware of the pitfalls involved

    At least you’re not one of those poor misguided souls who think that a Suzuki triple or RE5, BSA Bantam or CB250N are true classics and deserve to be treated as such.

    Edric 64
    Member

    Harley`s are like tractors with a couple of wheels removed .The most uncomfy bike I have ridden was a Harley and they are ugly.

    mrmoofo
    Member

    Harley`s are like tractors with a couple of wheels removed .The most unomfy bike I have ridden was a Harley and they are ugly.

    Not strictly my cup of tea but drive a Road King from LA to Las Vegas was great fun
    And introduced me to “Twins”. Have had 6 various models and makes but I can’t every see me going back to IN4s

    Premier Icon Capt. Kronos
    Subscriber

    Never had an inline 4 myself, they just leave me cold. Twins and triples all the way!

    I don’t really see the point of modern Harley’s… but a vintage number I could go with!

    Edric 64
    Member

    I enjoyed riding an sv1000 which was the first big v twin I rode

    paver456
    Member

    my favorite twin was an 05 sp2 awesome but painful to ride distance , the rsv mile was also a great bike ..

    my personal favorite was my gsxr1100H back in 1990 .. im feeling old suddenly
    [/URL]

    Dickyboy
    Member

    in the world of top trumps crap bikes my brother has a indian royal enfield, yes the diesel powered* one, its only redeming feature is that it is possible to get the engine to run backwards

    * possibly not the correct term

    5thElefant
    Member

    I had an old 500 mx bike that would nearly stall and them start running backwards. Nothing quite like dumping the clutch and disappearing backwards into a bush.

    Old bike are at their best in canals.

    mogrim
    Member

    Never had an inline 4 myself, they just leave me cold. Twins and triples all the way!

    The scream of an IL4 being pushed hard is a wonderful sound, though: easily as good as a twin.

    Never had an inline 4 myself, they just leave me cold. Twins and triples all the way

    inline fours are like riding demented sewing machines. Everyone knows big singles are the best for erm…… Something…..

    Pigface
    Member

    Quite a few single 2 strokes would start up backwards if they stopped at TDC, Gareth Roberts on his Sherpa at a trial in Caerphilly, waiting to get called into a section by the observer, carefully selects the right gear his eyes on the observer his face a mask of concerntration. “Yep, next” calls the observer, Gareth gives the bike some throttle drops the clutch and goes flying over the bars as the Bultaco shoots backwards. Cue pandemonium among the about 50 riders who were all watching, Gareth who was a humourless git is mortified and then gets very angry with the observer who had given him a five, he had landed in the section apparently.

    Really awful motorbike that I have experienced was a BMW R45, had a fairing like a barn door and was so slow.

    Premier Icon hot_fiat
    Subscriber

    V-twins are great: it’s like having a third brake. Was out with a few mates on Saturday & the inline 4s just sounded like a swarm of angry wasps. The speed triple lump was really characterful and my mate’s bonnie (new) was pretty cool and indecently quick.

    mattsccm
    Member

    How about a big single trail bike or supermoto.I keep coming back to Rotax CCM’s

    Dickyboy
    Member

    V-twins are great: it’s like having a third brake. Was out with a few mates on Saturday & the inline 4s just sounded like a swarm of angry wasps.

    V twin fan here too, but got passed by an MV 750F4 earlier this year & my god the howl was just beautiful

    Premier Icon weeksy
    Subscriber

    I’ve owned many of both Twins, IL4’s and singles…

    I’ve currently for 3 IL4’s.

    Last 3-4 bikes before that were all Twins.

    All have their place, all have their benefits.

    craigxxl
    Member

    I’ve had the same problem with been drawn to a Triumph Speedmaster. Surely I’m not that old yet. The Ducati Diavel was quite alluring too.
    Luckily I came to my senses and bought a KTM 990 Supermoto before I did something more stupid.

    tinsy
    Member

    Nah, 2 stroke, lots of travel, & a bit old school.

    Delivered last night at last, need to do a few things before first ride out though, she has been sat for best part of 30 years, engine strip proved all good inside though.

    Now sporting a set of Ohlins on the rear.

    Got to get some repro plastics to save originals, pair of Renthals, & a Doherty throttle & its good to go.

    I’d love an old British single, me. Or maybe a Matchless 650 twin.

    Nurse!

    I’ve currently got a Tiger 800 which I thought would slow me down a bit after a Speed Triple. However, the opposite appears to have happened, because the handling is so good on the less than perfect roads round here. I keep looking at Hinckley Bonnevilles though. Especially some of the customised ones …..

    5thElefant
    Member

    What’s that RM? Late 70s?

    I’ve got an 81 CR125 in the barn (the first of the liquid cooled generation), plus lots of NOS bits (I bought all of a bike shops old stock when they had a clear out).

    It’s my retirement project 🙂

    Premier Icon zippykona
    Subscriber

    I love mountain bikes but the magazines have said all they can about them.
    A copy of Classic Bike keeps me going for days. The call of something powered is strong.
    I don’t want to ride them anymore I just fancy a project. Hopefully time ,money and common sense will prevail.

    Premier Icon totalshell
    Subscriber

    the problem with motorcycles is they are addictive.. sure theres plenty of tinkering but that one day that makes it all worth while.. this years standout day..

    kinlochleven to Balamory and return 4 ferry trips torrential rain on my honda 400. epic day.

    Worst (and very, very occasionally, best) bike I’ve had was a Buell M2 – awesome when it was running properly, trouble was, this was an all too rare occurrence. Currently got a Harley Streetbob – whoever said they don’t see the point in modern Harleys has clearly never had to put up with an old one. I had my fair share of Japanese 2 strokes as a yoof (RD’ s, KH’ s and an LC) – unreliable for the most part, but don’t regret a single one.

    tinsy
    Member

    5thElefant, its a 1980, last of twinshock & last of aircooled 125 RM’s.

    If you need any more bits the guy I brought it off is the go to man for early CR’s.

    http://www.jkracinguk.com/

    Premier Icon weeksy
    Subscriber

    I don’t want to ride them anymore I just fancy a project. Hopefully time ,money and common sense will prevail

    nowt wrong with that mate, i did a mini restoration on a GPX750R a couple of years back, was VERY rewarding.

    I’m currently knee deep in another ‘mini’ project which is my R6 track bike, but in all honesty it’s not far from completion.

    bikebouy
    Member

    CCM 500, 5 strokes per hour..

    Duf..

    Duff….

    [/url]Camera Roll-36 by -bikebouy-[/img]

    Orange Crush
    Member

    Yeah, Bultacos were good for that, to the point where one guy had the tank badges made to read Ocatlub.

    In between trials we used the bikes to ride to school and my Bulto did the running backwards trick as I left a give way – straight back in to my French teacher’s Toledo. No damage to my rear tyre fortunately:-)

    globalti
    Member

    This thread has got my mouth watering… am watching an old but very tidy unmolested bike going for £750 on Ebay, the same as my first big bike back in the mid 80s. Have just called Swinton for an insurance quote and was surprised to be told £100 for third-party only. It would make a great tinkering / occasional warm sunny trip bike.

    Hmmmmmm……

    5thElefant
    Member

    5thElefant, its a 1980, last of twinshock & last of aircooled 125 RM’s.

    My mate had the 81. That was quite a leap they made.

    tinsy
    Member

    globalti, come on give us the link to the ebay bike…

    5thElefant, yeah it was a huge leap, but I fancy twinshock racing, there is a pre 83 class for early mono bikes though.

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