To be fair, it’s been a LOOOOONG time since I got proper angry on the road. Last time was a couple of years ago when I was faced with a car coming the wrong way down a sliproad straigt at me. He stopped. I stopped behind him, marched round, opened the door and I think he really thought I was going to lamp him. (I considered dragging him out by his windpipe, TBH) He got my full repitoire of Anglo Saxon, one after another, he did. Bloke in his 50s, suit, in a newish Saab. He won’t do that again.

with PP i often wonder how they get to the middle lane ..I however am doing 60 mph so it takes me much longer to pass the trucks. Very occasionally i still get to undertake some middle lane hogger even at that speed.

PP you slowed down to see what speed they actually change lane I got to 30 mph – very quiet motorway was young and stupid.

.blowing him into the weeds.
I find with drivers like that, blowing them a kiss is highly effective. They go spare.

i find not acting like a dick helps in situations like that

Cougar – Member

I find with drivers like that, blowing them a kiss is highly effective. They go spare.

I did this to a lorry driver once who was giving me evils….he then proceeded to rant at me out of his cab that he wanted to stop on the hard shoulder & beat the poo poo out of me.
I just dropped a gear in the old Fiesta and gave him all 75 horses. That showed him. Vroom.

PP you slowed down to see what speed they actually change lane I got to 30 mph – very quiet motorway was young and stupid.

Like it! 🙂

So, the experiment I mentioned earlier….
What I actually did the other week when I got one was to deliberately hog the middle lane once I’d passed the trucks, to see if they’d ever pass me, on either side……

I actaully got bored after several miles. They just sat there, getting closer and dropping back, then nearly taking my rear end off as I eventually pulled in…. Not clever, no, or in the event even very interesting, just bizzare….

I drive in the fast lane at 95mph and flash all the plebs if they won’t get out of my way, don’t they know that I am a very important businessman middle manager of international business nothing very important?

What p’s me off are these cretins who come blatting down the slip road at warp speed, fly across all the lines to the outside line and tailgate someone because they’re “only” doing 85mph in the outside line. How on earth can they have carefully judged how everyone else is moving in relation to each other?
My view is that as long as IM going faster than the traffic in the lane to my left i.e. Im overtaking anyone else trying to push me out of their way can get bent.

Very occasionally i still get to undertake some middle lane hogger even at that speed.

see when i come across middle lane hogs, I tend to stay in the inside lane until i reach them, then overtake them properly on the outside, then go back to the inside lane* (as I should)

I kinda hope that they’ll have an “oh im being a ‘tard sat here in the middle lane” epiphany moment when they see me pull out across 2 lanes to overtake, then cross back 2 lanes in front of them.

But I imagine in reality they don’t even notice…

*as long as its clear and safe enough to do so

I find with drivers like that, blowing them a kiss is highly effective.

A Friend of mine who is a fairly aggressive driver was having a shout at another driver once. The bloke calmly turned to him, put his finger to his lips and said “shhhhh”. It made him furious and still makes me laugh.

amedias – I’ve known someone (actually no, not me) play ‘squares’ where they then drop back into lane 1, let them past & do it again. 2 wrongs don’t make a right tho so be careful out there kids…

Yawn, can I be bothered? 😉

PP, you mention ‘IAM training’ – what training? Have you done the test?

BTW it’s hard shoulder, then lane 1,2,3,4 from left to right, not inside, outside, middle, slow, fast, overtaking, lorry etc etc etc. 👿

see when i come across middle lane hogs, I tend to stay in the inside lane until i reach them, then overtake them properly on the outside, then go back to the inside lane* (as I should)

Technically, you don’t have to do that. There is nothing wrong with travelling at a higher speed than traffic in a lane to your outside, assuming you adhere to the speed limit. Might be a bit shaky on safety grounds, but it’s not undertaking. Undertaking is moving from directly behind someone to their inside, passing them and then moving back to the original lane.

#1 type drivers are even more irritating if you’re going a bit faster. There you are sitting in the left lane doing 70 (honestly occifer), coming up on traffic ahead. #1 type driver comes past you, then slows down as they’re alongside you due to the traffic in front. You have to slow down in order to pull out behind them, into the right hand lane to get past them and the traffic, only for the whole thing to repeat a little while later.

the undertaking is an odd one if there is a hard shoulder [escape route]I assume it is sfaer to just carry on than cross three lanes at 60 to just get past one fool who has generally sat there for along time as I creep up on them… i now have a plausible defence from the Flying Ox are you a legal bod or copper? That is would my defence really work?

To be fair, it’s been a LOOOOONG time since I got proper angry on the road. Last time was a couple of years ago when I was faced with a car coming the wrong way down a sliproad straigt at me. He stopped. I stopped behind him, marched round, opened the door and I think he really thought I was going to lamp him. (I considered dragging him out by his windpipe, TBH) He got my full repitoire of Anglo Saxon, one after another, he did. Bloke in his 50s, suit, in a newish Saab. He won’t do that again.

*swoons*

I have seen this many times on the motorways and I sympathise with you. Yeah theirs slow drivers out there and some sit in the middle lane but if your a normal person you just go round them on the outside. People should just drive their own cars and not use them to give others driving lessons by intimidating them. It’s actually quite dangerous.

1) a lot of people are pretty stupid
2) see 1) above.

The thing is, a great many, if not the majority of people are really not looking at their speedos or concentrating on what’s around them – they are just looking at the road tunnel-vision style not thinking much.

The bloke accelerating up the slip-road, almost EVERYONE does that and I drive at the speed limit. It’s almost instinctive, and people usually just respond to their instincts like animals instead of thinking about what they are doing. You’ve made him drive slowly for a few seconds, so he pushes the loud pedal for a few seconds to reassure himself that he is still powerful and strong – all subconsciously.

Personally, I lift off as early as I can on sliproads to coast up them 🙂

Personally, I lift off as early as I can on sliproads to coast up them

The game being to hit the roundabout as fast as possible without touching the brakes?

No, the game being to use as little fuel as possible without pissing other drivers off. I usually do have to brake before the roundabout of course, but I don’t need to be using any fuel on it like most people seem to be.

The national hand signal for drivers sniffing your exaust, before ragging off when you clear the middle lane is right hand out of window, fist clenched then extend your index finger and thumb about 2 inches apart, and wave slowly, seems to really work, as they usually reciproccate with one finger or even two.

The OP is Surfmat and I claim my £5

In answer to number one, if I actually write something down, a sales order for example, I need the car infront to act as a guide and stop me from crossing the white line. Hands free is fine, but trying to get it all written down or use the iPad is a real PITA. So I simply latch on to a car with an appropriate speed. Simples.

PP, you mention ‘IAM training’ – what training? Have you done the test?

Yep. Motorcycle advanced test.

It’s worth doing if only for learning the finer interpretations of the Highway Code, all the ins and outs of it. And it does make you a faster, safer rider. I didnt’t agree with everything they teach, some of it is still just to pass another test IMO, where I prefer to be a bit more fluid and think for myself. But on the whole it’s worth it.

Everyone should have to sit it before they’re allowed out in a car with more than about 100bhp/tonne IMO 🙂

You really start to notice those who start to speed up when overtaking, when your employer fits a 68mph limiter to your van. After a week I got so tired of being marooned in the middle lane that I changed driving habits and now drive at around 56mph with the trucks, but still occasionally I will creep up on someone, pull out and then 30 seconds later, find myself on the limiter and struggling to pass. Shortly after pulling in they will fall back to their earlier speed and they will drop out of site.

What is with the latest thing of roaring down a slip road with an “I will merge regardless” attitude?? No looking over the shoulder or using their mirrors……..Gggaaaahhhhhh!

Came close to a crash last month in that situation, I’m descending a steep hill on a dual carriageway at 50mph in a big white van, with an even bigger big white heavy trailer. Traffic passing on right, car joining on left. She doesn’t check her mirrors, let alone the blind spot, dead level with me. I sound the horn to give her an early warning, she glances at me. I get uneasy, I have no real acceleration, (only 115 bhp to move up to 6.3 tons) and can’t brake too hard as the trailer is a horsebox, and I don’t want to end up stopping in lane one in a stalemate like you occasionally see. I sound horn for about 5 seconds as we get to the give way markings, she makes eye contact and I flash and gesture with my arm that she should push the go pedal. She looks ahead again for another couple of seconds, I use the horn again and she glances at me but still doesn’t take any action. Another blast and a glance. At this point she’s almost at the end of the slip, I’m on the cats eyes to keep some space between us. I hit the horn again and fully expected her to either drive onto the grass or just drive into my passenger door, she suddenly slows down whilst giving me a dirty look, tries to tuck in behind me and then scares herself ****less when she finally notices she has managed to join and share lane one alongside a big trailer. During this I have slowed to 40mph, but it appears she has realised her mistake as she sheepishly refuses to pass me all the way down the hill and even holds back as she joins a long slip road until trees block her from view. Probably the same person that caused a friend to do an emergency stop in a 7.5 ton horse lorry a few months earlier at the same slip, sending the horse through a steel breast bar and into the bulkhead. Luckily it appeared the horse was tougher than the lorry 🙂

I’ll let you into a secret. Hardly anyone can drive worth shit.

A Friend of mine who is a fairly aggressive driver was having a shout at another driver once. The bloke calmly turned to him, put his finger to his lips and said “shhhhh”. It made him furious and still makes me laugh.

Now that made me laff!
Seen all the above, despite doing relatively little motorway milage. As someone said, it’s about trying to maintain momentum, keeping a steady speed with as little slowing down as possible. I managed to do a trip to That London, from the garage just along the road from me to King’s Mall, Hammersmith, near enough 100miles, in exactly 1½ hours, at four in the afternoon. Couldn’t believe it when I got to the car park.
Regarding the ‘undertaking’ thing, I do as was suggested; stick at the speed I’m currently doing, around 70, and if the outer lane is busy, I just stay where I am. I try to use mirrors as much as poss, check slip roads as I’m approaching them to see if any muppet’s going to come screaming out and try to shove his way through the traffic, and watch for the dick who suddenly gets bored and pulls out without checking behind and using his indicator. Now that really boils my wee!

my commute home involves joining the m3 from the m27 travelling west lane 1 becomes lane 2, and the lane 1 from the west becomes an exit lane 2 becomes lane 1. basically 2 lanes either direction join 2+2=4.

it’s not difficult (apart from to explain) most people CANNOT do it. especialy people who can’t read the signs and indicate from lane 2 into lane 3 as they think their lane is a slip road. soon enough they merge back across to lane !!

or the people who enter motorway tailgating but can’t/ won’t identify a space and merge in!!

most driving is shit!

When my old man learnt to ride a motorbike his instructor suggested you treat everyone else on the road as if they are a dust bin that is about to roll into your path.

Trust no one.

Oh and anyone who does’nt understand how to give way on a sliproad joining a motorway deserves a hot poker up the ass..

When my old man learnt to ride a motorbike his instructor suggested you treat everyone else on the road as if they are a dust bin that is about to roll into your path.

Trust no one

This ^^^ is how I treat other road users – assume they are all idiots/blind/irrattional/stupid.

I’ll tell you something that irks me and it’s taking things in the opposite direction…..

People that seem out to make a point that they are a good driver, by driving really badly. By this I mean they will come from lane 3 after overtaking into lane 2, then into lane 1 even though there is a lorry 50yds ahead, so back out, then straight back in again only to be back out in lane 3 10 seconds later. No need to make a point, try driving smoothly and that would be more impressive.

STR, perhaps they’re trying to tell you that you’re hogging the middle lane 😆

Can’t say I’ve really noticed #1 happening but a couple of possible explanations:
– I occasionally find myself on auto-pilot where I’ve matched the speed of the car in front and done a couple of miles before I’ve realised I’m either going slower or faster than I wanted to. It only happens if the speed difference was small when I initially got close though (I don’t roar up behind people at 95 then sit behind them at 65 :p ).
– Possibly they know it’s near a popular cop spot (or their sat nav speed camera sonar is pinging) so they pull in behind for a bit until they think it’s safe. Or possibly you drive a white car with a roof rack on so they panic and think you’re a cop car so pull in before they realise you aren’t then shoot off again :p

indeed what Rich penny said they are telling you that you are crap and inconsiderate

Not at all – I don’t hog any lane, but on the contrary I don’t pull into a slower lane when I’ll be pulling out again 5 seconds later – constant lane switching can cause more chaos than sensible lane choice.

I don’t pull into a slower lane when I’ll be pulling out again 5 seconds later

I will sometimes do that if someone’s approaching from behind and the speed differential is enough. Good manners, no?

Slower lane WTF is that lane? Unfortunately, for you, the highway code says the near lane is your lane and all the others are just for overtaking, but hey you know best. Forcing cars across three lanes to get past you seems to prove your point about how well you have chosen your lane. When they then obey the highway code afterwards, returning to he nears side NOT THE SLOW LANE of course they are still wrong and you are right to stay in an overtaking lane.

RichPenny – Member

I don’t pull into a slower lane when I’ll be pulling out again 5 seconds later

I will sometimes do that if someone’s approaching from behind and the speed differential is enough. Good manners, no?

No, not if it means frantic manouevering and I will have to pull out straight away again, if lane 3 is free. Two changes of direction for me, or one for the following vehicle – which makes more sense?

There is a difference between going out of your way to abide by what you perceive to be the rules of the road and sensible driving. Having an awareness of what is a few vehicles ahead, what is behind and what is to your right and left is the key, not just being as far left as you can at all times.

Junkyard, have a word with yourself, then when you have, actually bother to read my post properly.

Stop being a tool for the sake of an argument please. Swerving erratically across 3 lanes is obviously safer than taking a sensible line according to you?

Two changes of direction for me, or one for the following vehicle – which makes more sense?

Surely its two for them as well, since they’ll pull in after overtaking you. I agree there’s no need for frantic manouevers, but if they’re approaching at a speed where I think I can get in and out again with no dramas then I will move over. Sometimes I misjudge it slightly and I have to brake 😯

No, not if it means frantic manouevering and I will have to pull out straight away again, if lane 3 is free. Two changes of direction for me, or one for the following vehicle – which makes more sense?

Only if it then stays in the fast lane for ever then otherwise same number of moves but unfortunately you had to do them rather than them 🙄

There is a difference between going out of your way to abide by what you perceive to be the rules of the road and sensible driving.

do you have a different version of the highway code you wish to share with us?
Ah excellent make it sound worse each post like it so first just changing lanes then it was frantic and now they are swerving next post will they be blindly careering across lanes ? Perhaps you should stop using different words each time to make it sound more dangerous , stop calling me a tool, consider other road users and actually comment on your inaccurate descriptions of lanes, lane discipline and the highway code?

Can’t say I’ve really noticed #1 happening but a couple of possible explanations:
– I occasionally find myself on auto-pilot where I’ve matched the speed of the car in front and done a couple of miles before I’ve realised I’m either going slower or faster than I wanted to. It only happens if the speed difference was small when I initially got close though (I don’t roar up behind people at 95 then sit behind them at 65 :p ).

I find I do this sometimes too.
BTW if anyone saw some bizarre driving on the M25 at midnight last night that was probably me after my fiancée freaked out after a massive spider ran across dashboard up the A pillar and stopped by her head. I had to quickly pull over to the hard shoulder as it wasn’t safe to drive with her freaking out next to me. The spider disappeared before I stopped but she soon realised that the hard shoulder in the dark and rain with artic roaring past is more scary than any spider. I haven’t found the spider yet so she may need some tranquillisers before tomorrows 3.5hr journey!

If you change lanes, surely it’s only common sense and courtesy to match your speed to that of the traffic already in that lane?

Rigidly sticking to your self imposed speed limit will only lead to bunching as everyone slows behind you, won’t it?