As thread title, things aren’t right and I’m self diagnosing myself as likely to be suffering from BPD (using NHS website and wikipedia as sources…).

I’m seeing (in varying degrees):

Disturbed sense of identity/distorted self image

Splitting

Intense disproportionate emotional reactions and sensitivity in relationships with others

(mild) self damaging behaviour, some ideation…

Dissociation & depersonalisation

Affective dysregulation

Dysphoria

Not showing signs of reckless behavoiur though…

Anybody got any advice/course of action?

My suggestion, with advice of mental health matron sitting next to me is go and see your doctor as soon as possible.

Take care.

J

Best to go seek medical help, your Doctor should refer you.

There’s more I could say, living with someone that has a BPD diagnosis, but you’ve done enough Internet research for now on what is only a maybe.

Are you under 25?

A BPD diagnosis will not be forthcoming if you are. Go see your GP  for a mental health referral. I hope that you aren’t in Suffolk as provision here is shit!

It’s a great first step to have the ability to self diagnose your condition. And as has been suggested, seeking medical help has to be the best course of action.   I think I’m living with someone who shows some of the signs of BPD,  but unfortunately if I even suggested seeing a doctor, I’d suffer with a “disproportionate emotional reaction”.  All the best.

Without wishing to appear or be regarded as facetious, with enough time and Internet and depending upon how I’m feeling within myself, I could self diagnose myself with nearly every mental disorder.

As the advice above, go seek a professional, such as your GP in the first instance, for help and possibly referral.

Without knowing you, your background, your current situation and age, and a myriad of other stuff, your self diagnosis cannot be confirmed or denied here. The one factor to your advantage is your self awareness, many people slide into a mental condition unknowingly.

I wish you well.

As above – you/we will most likely have the traits of just about everyone of the personality disorders at some point … that in itself does not prove you have BPD.

*I am no MH expert; Whilst everyone is individual – there would be significant background to give further weight to the diagnosis.

(*limited experience of conducting MH assessments within a CMHT)

Thanks to all for your response.

I wasn’t expecting a diagnosis, I should have been clearer. I’m seeing traits emerge and recently had two distinct ‘episodes’ which have given me concern.

First was entering a work meeting where I felt I had walked into a hostile environment (it wasn’t, I’m missed the start and didn’t understand the context) and felt like I was somehow only physicaly present in the situation. It’s the closest to ‘out of body’ I’ve felt. I felt that I was observing, not participating…

Second was the leaving of a work colleague (more the manner) which lead to a disproprtionate emotional reaction which manifested in extreme agitation which lead me to ‘beating myself up’, i.e. using my fists to inflict physical pain to cut through the emotional.

I am also finding ‘reasons’ as to why certain work situations have occured where I’m reading ‘reactions’ which have paranoid elements (either that or I’m actually extremely acute and able to read other peoples motivations…).

I have hit what I understand dysphoria to be. A condition/trait I have slid in and out of for the last 10 years at least.

I am ‘planning’ (only in a very loose sense) ideation and have started inplementing some preparatory elements (but to be honest these are common sense, and could be determined positive in isolation, but are me starting to put my affairs in order). I have lived with similar feelings, spardoically, over a 30 year period but this is the strongest pull I felt in the last 10.

I understand I don’t fit the full profile, somewhere between 40-60%. I don’t exhibit the ‘needy’ bit (but I run scenarios through my head where I play these by proxy). I don’t misuse drink/drugs and generally I’m about as risk averse as you could meet. The main problem is recognising the parts that do…

I’m way older than 25. For obvious reasons the login is a fully anonymised one… I’m not ready to break cover yet (in any sphere).

It can be very hard to be objective about your own mental health, the more one is suffering, typically the more perception is skewed. You have a issue that needs attention, so please seek help from your GP today. There will be a waiting list for treatment on the NHS.

If your symptoms get worse, call your mental health Crisis Resolution Team. You could call them for advice on your current situation. Even if you don’t want to talk to them now, look up the number and keep it on your phone just in case you need it in a hurry.

Hi, I’m not a MH expert but your first example sounds like anxiety to me. Anyway, as already said above, if how you’re feeling is causing you distress, it may be time to go to the drs.

I know nack-all about MH but the emphasis of everything you’ve described is work related. Do you suffer strongly outside of work and / or periods dissociated with work (leave / holiday). Have the elevated experiences coincided with changes at work? Maybe you can get a doc to sign you off for a couple of weeks to see if it has any impact. Is work the main thing in your life?

Hmm, anxiety, my father was severely affected by this at the end of his life. I definitely exhibit some social anxiety issues. I realy don’t like social occaisions where there there more than a hnadful people, even amongst ‘close’ friends…

however, the work related events are more that I have been successful in ‘pushing’ people away over the years so most social contact/inteaction is via the workplace. Ironically work has often been a device that I’d used to structure my life around and there are now some real changes coming that do cause me real anxiety… (but that very much post dates the events stated) and probably prompted me to post in the first place. I need the discipline of work to keep me grounded.

i have a close relative how is in MH, I’ll see if I can grab a word when I see them next…

Get to the docs, try to get referred to someone who can diagnose, GP first port of call to get process on the go. You may need to push a bit for this.

Having self awareness of your situation is a massive plus in your favour and will help you no end.

If you have a close relative in MH then make an effort to see them, don’t ‘wait until next time you see them’.

All the best

My last post probably sounded a bit flippant when not intended, I should be seeing my relative this coming weekend. Seen as they are a CPN, I suspect this will be the best (and fastest) route…

Guess its finally time to break cover.

Breaking cover can be the toughest stage but can also be cathartic. It is also the beginning of hopefully solving the issues so good luck.