Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 308 total)
  • 16 year old son smoking weed
  • Premier Icon jonesyboy
    Subscriber

    He’s started smoking weed, tried to not over react, telling him about the health implications etc. Anyone advice on how to deal with it? Not sure taking away biking and gym would be wise as he’ll have bugger all to do

    Chill Winston.

    It’s all gwan be irie

    nick1962
    Member

    Hide your own stash pronto!

    brownsauce
    Member

    lights reefer…

    *shrugs*

    qwerty
    Member

    I’m no expert on this, but IIRC… I’d be concerned if super strength skunk type weed, it’s high in THC and the other stuff (name escapes me) that has been modified out of said weed is what balances the effects on your MH. In short, the high strength super skunks raise your risk factors for psychosis etc, particularly in the vulnerable (young).

    Time for open, honest discussion about weed and his use / relationship with it. Don’t criticise, inform and try to understand his relationship with it.

    … having first informed yourself on as many of the sides of the story as you can.

    Or, reverse psychology… get stoned with him, probably be totally uncool & he’ll then drink instead!

    Talk.

    Premier Icon ctk
    Subscriber

    Don’t worry unless its happening all the time.

    qwerty
    Member

    👆 that too, a toke at a party / Saturday night is one thing, getting hammered most nights is another.

    Premier Icon singlespeedstu
    Subscriber

    Sit down with him.
    Buff one up and talk about the pros and cons while you’re both stoned.
    No different to having a beer with him.

    a toke at a party / Saturday night is one thing, getting hammered most nights is another.

    Same as beer then.

    myti
    Member

    I smoked my 1st joint at 16 at a party of some of my mum’s friends. I asked her if she would ask her friend if i could try it as was intrigued. She agreed but was most concerned about me getting addicted to the tabacco but she knew that banning me or making me go underground with it would not help. I dabbled a bit through uni days but grew up and now i hate being stoned. I really think it’s a phase most teens will want to try so just give advise and don’t push him so he just hides it from you.

    Edukator
    Member

    Worry. One of junior’s ski mates became a heavy user in his teens. By 17 he had become more than a little paranoid. One Winter day he ran out of the house barefoot and lightly dressed after a fairly minor family tiff. A few days later he was found, dead from hypothermia.

    Having observed junior’s contemporary users it seems reactions are variable. Some just smoke socially, some develop a social life that revolves around smoking. Some continue to function more or less normally, some become paranoid and anti-social.

    I was fairly confrontational on the dope front (confronting his dealer) However I suggested magic mushrooms or LSD were more amusing, might give existential insights and so long as it wasn’t something else sold as such wouldn’t do much damage long term.

    He’s 21 now and knows more now from first hand experience than I’ll ever know… :/

    Premier Icon singlespeedstu
    Subscriber

    A few days later he was found, dead from hypothermia.

    Drugs don’t kill people temperatures do in a GLC style.

    loddrik
    Member

    My 13 year old daughter ( 14 next week) has it occasionally. Plus an occasional drink. A do her friends. We aren’t stressed about it. I’m really pleased that she feels she can talk to us about it. We’ve just said that she’s with friends when she does it.

    Any parent who thinks their kids do what their parents want when they’re out with friends is deluded, so we feel as long as she can come to us for advice and support then that’s great with us.

    Premier Icon footflaps
    Subscriber

    Just part of growing up, I stared at 6th form (17 ish) and continued through first two years of Uni, which might explain why I can’t remember any of it. Then got bored of it and stopped. Seemed to turn out OK-ish (ie no worse than everyone else).

    Premier Icon eskay
    Subscriber

    Whatever you say won’t make any difference.

    Don’t alienate him and accept that this is what a huge number of kids go through (difficult as it may be). Don’t cut off communication lines.

    Also remember that this is legal in some countries and may (one day) be legal here.

    Edukator
    Member

    Whatever you say won’t make any difference.

    I disagree, but you say some things knowing that it’s going to result in a proper shit storm which you consider acceptable in the bigger picture. Some battles are worth fighting.

    The legal aspect is not the issue, alcohol is legal and higher risk.

    I found that the most productive discussions were on a fun for risk basis. This might help:
    https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-11660210

    klunky
    Member

    Something not often mentioned is that if caught and charged you can spoil chances of holidays to the USA and Australia etc.
    With brexit looming could it risk your chances getting to anywhere? Unlikely but you never know.

    wrightyson
    Member

    Not read the above but I’d solely be punching my kids in the (delete as appropriate) vitals just for smoking!

    Premier Icon survivor
    Subscriber

    Sooooo…. I’m kinda one of those for whom it wrong for.

    Got carried with mainly weed and some ecstasy use..

    I loved the stuff but had to admit defeat after my mental health plummeted. 20 years later I still struggle. I’ve been given a life sentence for my teenage decisions.

    Skunk was kinda new when I started but got easier to get as years went by. It is far more potent than resin of the time so don’t doubt with heavy use it can flip that switch for those who are susceptible. Me, as it turns out. Didn’t know at the time but our family has a long history of mental health problems.

    My mother in particular went ballistic with me at the time but I did the teenage rebel thing and carried on regardless so kicking off is not the best solution.

    My advice, connsider any history of mental health problems in your family, have a sensible conversation and lay out the risks of heavy and unhealthy use and feel free to show your son my post as a warning of what can happen if he gets a taste for it and his use gets out of hand.

    After all this I’m not anti weed but I learned the hard way that, moderation is key…

    Good luck

    Premier Icon MarkyG82
    Subscriber

    I’ve dabbled in the past. MrsG is dead against it and recently said she’d be very upset if our boy touched it (he’s just turned 2 so a while off yet). Personally I’d go down the have a chat route and find out what the motives are. If it’s for personal interest to see what it’s like then he’ll soon get bored. If anything else?… Maybe a stronger chat.

    Premier Icon Jon Taylor
    Subscriber

    How the hell else are kids supposed to deal with this world they’re in I don’t know.

    chewkw
    Member

    Not read the above but I’d solely be punching my kids in the (delete as appropriate) vitals just for smoking!

    Tough love 👍

    Premier Icon CountZero
    Subscriber

    Give him a pile of Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers comix and tell him it’s his future self…

    Premier Icon Poopscoop
    Subscriber

    I only fabled a bit in earlier life and had pretty laid back opinions on it till a few years back.

    At that point a good friends son had a drug induced psychosis. It nearly tore him and his family apart.

    He is on medication for the rest of his life and will never have anything remotely like an ordinary life now. Relationships, job. Not a chance.

    Was quite an eye opener.

    It’s endemic now though, many smoke it just like it’s having a normal rollup.

    Best you can do is educate your son as best you can. This subject has come up with my son in recent years. I’m still concerned that’s for sure.

    loum
    Member

    Not sure taking away biking and gym would be wise as he’ll have bugger all to do

    You’re right there, IMO.
    One way out is through sport and the negative effects smoking has on fitness and health.
    Restricting sport will push him down the wrong path.
    Get him a new bike .

    Premier Icon gofasterstripes
    Subscriber

    Teach him how to cook it and at the same time explain how, like everything, it can become a crutch you over-rely on.

    Cooking grass with a Ban Marie is a good way to avoid damage from smoking and the longer high will make it seems less casual decision. I’d reccomend making fudge 🙂

    Everything in moderation, even moderation.

    cheekyboy
    Member

    My 17 yo nephew started smoking weed at 14, hes now a fully fledged road man, hes stolen, gone missing, been suspended from school and even starred in his own worldwide, viral facebook campaign after he was filmed being beaten up by bullies, good luck with this, hope it turns out well for you.

    Google Yousef Makki.

    Smoked it almost daily from 14/15 through to my late 20s. A day without a spliff would guarantee a sleepless night.

    I wouldn’t be too happy with either of my boys smoking it (my eldest is now 14), but would be more ok if it was the lighter stuff than the super strong skunk – which I think leads to mental health issues.

    Being involved in the drug scene always carried a risk, but I just get the impression that it is more so nowadays. More sinister people behind the average dealer and less tolerance for people knocking out a bit of drugs from their homes.

    Premier Icon jonesyboy
    Subscriber

    Trying to focus on the biking, bpw next week for a day. I’m asthmatic after smoking fags and joints as a yoof, don’t want him to develop that. Maybe I should bake him some hash cakes!

    trumpton
    Member

    Strong weed will cause mental health problems imho. Even if it’s years down the line after giving up weed. Also tobacco addiction.

    TurnerGuy
    Member

    You should have offered it to him previously – my parents offered me cigarettes at 15, tried one, never smoked since…

    Premier Icon footflaps
    Subscriber

    Walking / cycling around Cambridge it seems endemic, everyone is smoking weed openly in public. In my day it was only smoked in private houses / remote fields etc. Very rare to every smell it out and about back then.

    Strong weed will cause mental health problems imho.

    Strong weed can cause mental health problems, much the same as smoking tobacco can cause lung cancer. There are some people who use either/both drugs and never develop either/both side-effects. And that’s not “imho”, that’s based on research.

    https://ndarc.med.unsw.edu.au/blog/does-cannabis-cause-mental-illness

    In contrast, the relationship between cannabis use and risk of developing symptoms of psychosis has been well established in many different review articles.

    This research has found that early and frequent cannabis use is a component cause of psychosis, which interacts with other risk factors such as family history of psychosis, history of childhood abuse and expression of the COMT and AKT1 genes. These interactions make it difficult to determine the exact role of cannabis use in causing psychosis that may not have otherwise occurred.

    Regardless, the connection between cannabis use and psychosis is not surprising. There is a strong resemblance between the acute and transient effects of cannabis use and symptoms of psychosis, including impaired memory, cognition and processing of external stimuli. This combines to make it hard for a person to learn and remember new things but can also extend to the experience of deluded thinking and hallucinations.

    We also know that cannabis use by people with established psychotic disorder can exacerbate symptoms.

    Overall, the evidence suggests cannabis use will bring forward diagnosis of psychosis by an average of 2.7 years.

    The risk of developing schizophrenia increases with the duration and dose of cannabis use. Regular cannabis users have double the risk of non-users. Those who have used cannabis at some point in their life have a 40% increased risk compared with non-users.

    That said, it is important to view this increased risk in context. The proportions of individuals with psychosis among the population and among cannabis users are low. Current estimates suggest that if frequent long-term cannabis use was known to cause psychosis, the rates of incidence would increase from seven in 1,000 in non-users to 14 in 1,000 cannabis users.

    To the OP, if you want some more level-headed information/advice I throughly recommend;

    https://erowid.org/plants/cannabis/cannabis.shtml

    You’ll find a great deal of well-researched advice, complete with a significant amount links to useful references. You’ll also find honest experience reports, good, bad and meh. I recomend it as a reference site to colleagues in A&E and those I work with directly in ITU because it’s quite useful both for understanding what our potential patients may be using and what can be abused for its ‘positive’ side-effects.

    As for a 16 yo smoking weed, as long as he isn’t hammering it every night of the week I recommend a soft touch. In my experience, being overly prohibitive is the best way to push a teenager further into drink/drugs, as at that age much of the drive to partake is driven by a sense of rebellion.

    My daughter smoked her first joint when she and I were at a Green Day concert. By allowing her to try it whilst I was present I was both able to be there for her incase she had a bad experience but also show that it’s no big thing for us, taking a bit of the ‘rebellion’ out of doing it. To be honest I’d be a complete hypocrite if I were to use a blanket “drugs are bad” line with her as, although I was never a fan of cannabis, I was a massive caner back in my clubbing days. Yet I’m still here, holding down a very responsible job and getting along otherwise fine.

    Tell him it screws up your testicles for life.

    Premier Icon northernsoul
    Subscriber

    Chill Winston.

    It’s all gwan be irie

    and

    Hide your own stash pronto!

    Cue awkward moment explaining to my 7 yo what I was laughing at.

    I think 30 years ago I would have been less worried than now because of the increase in THC content that has taken place over that time. At the end of the day though I think you have to make sure he knows the facts, make it clear that you’re there to offer support, and then trust him to make the right choices. As some have said above, being strict/prohibitive isn’t likely to be productive. My father took a similar approach with me (told me once he disapproved and don’t get into trouble etc). Doesn’t mean I didn’t dabble, but I did all things in moderation (most of the time) and stayed away from anything I wasn’t sure of (I knew my limits). But that was my responsibility, not his.

    TurnerGuy
    Member

    How the hell else are kids supposed to deal with this world they’re in I don’t know.

    in this country ? ship him out to Syria and let him see what that’s like…

    Premier Icon al2000
    Subscriber

    Maybe I should bake him some hash cakes!

    Good call – the massive whitey when you inevitably miscalculate the dose should do an excellent job of putting him off.

    More seriously, there’s some good advice in this thread and a soft touch approach is the safest way to proceed, with heavy caveats around strength, frequency of use etc.

    Premier Icon Wally
    Subscriber

    Go for a father/son long bike ride somewhere out of both your comfort zones. Have a giggle enjoy the endorphins and then discuss the elephant in the room on drive home whilst stating you love him if it feels right.

    verbboy
    Member

    Sootyandjim has got it spot on in my opinion.

    Had a puff once and absolutely hated it, so do not have an experience myself. But I have seen friends children get seriously into it and scary to see.

    At his age a bit every now and then isn’t ideal but tell him to stop he of course is very unlikely to do that. His brain has alot of development to go through, this is one of the reason he shouldn’t be abusing it.

    Every case will be different but if he is a fundamentally a good lad try to carefully steer him, we all do stupid sh!t in our life so we shouldn’t judge too much we often all turn out basically OK.

    One thing to remember is the a confidence feedback loop (this applies to all of us, driving, riding our bikes, drinking you name it) Misplaced belief (drinking is fine) > behave negatively (drink way too much and drive home) > experience no consequences (no accident, didn’t get caught felt in control) > reinforced belief (that wasn’t a problem). Round and around you go until if goes bat sh!t wrong. So a puff here and there can morph into something a whole lot more serious.

    Best of luck, maybe buy him a new bike and taking him riding lots he won’t have time to smoke 😉

    Premier Icon davros
    Subscriber

    Tell him that he is likely funding human trafficking and modern slavery.

    Premier Icon sargey
    Subscriber

    Tell him if he smokes it regularly he will turn out like some of the knobs on here, that wi will stop him.

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