You spend an hour and a half deliberating over a Moroccan Blue or Orange Long sleeve Rapha jersey.

Feel free to add other completely unimportant and pretentious roadie tart decisions below.

First world problems right here.

ive spent hours deliberating over my ideal Baum cycles paint job and spec despite knowing i will probably never afford one.

I got some vouchers for my Birthday from my parents and wife so basically its free and probably a fair saving over a Baum – enjoy dreaming.

Just ordered some new water bottles because they match the frame colour better.

I might clean the mud off mine at some point. Might even lube the chain. Does that make me a tart?

Northwind can you leave this thread now please, your type isnt welcome here.

You know you’ve become a roadie biketart when……

Although both of my two 750ml bottles match my bike I am concerned they don’t match each other.

Your spokes cost £4 each and you can’t wear blue and need more socks and possible shoes to match the frame.

^ yes i can understand that problem. You need to get them matching asap.

You’ve spent 30 mins looking at the weight of cassettes.
When you feel like you’ve not quite yet found the perfect bottle cage.

£140 ouch!

You spend an hour and a half deliberating over a Moroccan Blue or Orange Long sleeve Rapha jersey.

Ooh, long sleeve Rapha jerseys are back in stock! Ace.
Now, which colour should I get…?

you fit some new cranks because you cracked your old ones with your grrrnnaarrrr power. when fitting the cranks you realise that because you left your bike in a leaking outbuilding for a couple of months, the chain has rusted solid so you take an old one off your mountain bike which you’ll replace with a new one soon. you pump the tyres up, put on your baggies, peaked helmet, MTB jersey and MTB pedals/ shoes and go and knock out 100km before lunchtime.

Is that the kind of thing you’re thinking of?

I changed the gear outers on my new hardtail as white was a bit too garish on a black bike.

Full susser has a nicely co-ordinated bottle cage as well.

Oh we were talking about roadie bits?

Well I can’t find any white headset spacers or top caps for my ‘best’ road bike.

*mancrush on brakes*

Crazy legs I appreciate your opinion on colour.

Orange is club colours and visibility is better but blue is nicer. Orange appears to be the new pink.

Brakes, can you stop swearing peak hat on a roady – go away.

before i opened this thread i just *knew* rapha would feature somewhere 😆

You shave your legs and apply false tan.

yes and embrocation creme

I never wear green on the bike..
Socks are only ankle length..
White bar tape changed 4 times a year at least..
Carbon bottle cages only even though they don’t grip bottles very well..
Roadie cap under helmet..Rapha one at that..the Red one.

Rapha.cc is your homepage..

Endeth.

bb – not only do you sail you have good road style

Although I think you should take the sock length up a bit

I ordered a new set of pimp wheels for my ‘training road bike’ today as well as a copy of Cycling Plus.

I’ll be shaving my legs next 😳

dont forget some moisturise geetee, nivea for men post shave stuff is good.

You try and talk your wife out of that foreign holiday and into camping in the UK so you can spend the cash on new lighter wheels, even though you don’t race and the ones you have at the moment are fine. 😳

I’ll be shaving my legs next

Mine need re-doing tonight.
In fact I’m almost embarrassed to do tonight’s track session with the stubble that’s on my legs.

😳

When I saw Rapha were sponsoring Sky Pro Cycling I got a warm glow all over my body but especially down there.

I’m such a tart my water bottles match my Ti hardtail frame. And I just ordered a new chain……in gold. I’m already regretting that purchase but I actually, truthfully could not stop myself.

This is going on a mountain bike.

You cut down your already light carbon seat post to save weight (

I often like to go out all in white when its sunny

white shorts,
liquigas mainly white top,
white gloves
white glasses
white shoes
white socks

white skin 😳

http://internationale.teamjva.com/

warton,you must know it’s not going to rain,I’ve seen quite a lot of white lycra go see through 😯 when wet

You remove the “ugly” secondary bottle cage – silver alloy – and only put it back on when going on a longer ride. Ti & Ti only please.

You start using the kitchen scales a lot and agonise over the relative weight of every component, despite the weight difference being less than you’d lose if you had a dump.

GET OUT.

Wharton, fail on the white shorts sonny..

Who wants to see your hair arse??

When the red on the bottle cages doesn’t match the red on the water bottles. 😳

You cut the stalks off bananas to save weight.