You somehow seize one fleeting opportunity to make the phone call that might save you.

Who do you call, and why?

My brother.

He knows how to clear by browser history remotely.

Are you watching Gogglebox by any chance?

The A Team, obviously.

Ghostbusters. Because they’re who you gonna call.

Ghost busters?

Liam Neeson. Or Ghost Busters.

Liam Neeson?
He has a particular set of skills and he will find them and kill them.

Edit. Bother beaten to it.

Liam Neeson.

Winston wolf.

My wife and my family

[video]https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4-vjbuodBEU[/video]

Yosser Hughes..

One of my ex colleagues, head of hostage negotiations !

Hooten, from Hooten and the Lady.

Obvz.

the Police.

Batman.

One of my ex colleagues, head of hostage negotiations !

Oddly, I also have ex-colleagues from K&R! Don’t think we were at the same outfit, though.

NHS DIRECT, because they will imediately send an ambulance and paramedics

brakes – Member
the Police.

I doubt Sting would be any help at all.

project – Member
NHS DIRECT, because they will imediately send an ambulance and paramedics

Yeah, like..right.

Batman doesn’t have a good hostage recovery record…….

It’d have to be Scotty so he could “beam me up”
🙂

UKIP: They’d baffle the kidnappers with their crap and then let it descend into a fist-fight whilst I do a runner. I hear they’re handy in a fight. God help the ‘nappers if they are foreign, too.

Condorman.

Nigel Farage

to tell him hes a c— and hes ruined my country, it might be my last chance

Bomber salesman

Batman doesn’t have a good hostage recovery record…….

But I’d tell him I was called Martha

Jason Bourne of course.

He will destroy them all!

Donald Trump, he’d make it great again.

the A team

Some random contact from my list of facebook friends who I haven’t spoken to for years. The hunted team would find me by tea time.

#kidnappedlol #whoeventalksonethephoneanymore @scotlandyard @mi6

Dominos.

Scratch that, local Indian, order their most evil concoction with masses of naan bread, the bad guys will eat it, scoff the bread and all be stuck in the bog for a day begging for me to take them to A+E.

I’d call work to tell them I won’t be in. Last thing I need is to lose my job if the kidnappers ever let me go. That would just be the perfect end to a crap week.

Chuck Norris , because he can slam shut a revolving door

My Mum.

Jewish mothers are the only known substance to frequently ignore the fundamental rules of physics, chemistry, geography and logic. They’re basically unstoppable when on the warpath.

It’s like the terminator but with chicken soup and Challah bread.

My Mum.
Jewish mothers are the only known substance to frequently ignore the fundamental rules of physics, chemistry, geography and logic. They’re basically unstoppable when on the warpath.
It’s like the terminator but with chicken soup and Challah bread.

Literally weeping with laughter! 😆