Once my brother stomped on my foot with his new Doctor Martens boots and it went right through the big toenail and the blood covered my sock and went all in the carpet. My parents went mental at him, hahahaha.

Who’s got a good one?

We’d been fighting like cat and dog all round the supermarket.

He’d whacked me, i’d whacked him back and then legged it up the stairs in the car park. I hid round the side of the door and kicked him in the leg as he came through the door. Caught him good and proper, ended up with a thrombosis? about the size of a tennis ball on his leg, hospital trips and all sorts.

I threw a screwdriver at my brother and it stuck in his leg.When he saw the shock on my face,in an instant,without taking it out,he ran to show my mum. 😳
I was in trouble that day.

Throwing stones… As he turned around clean on the back of the head…

my Uncle was getting annoyed at his older brother for calling him names so got my grandads cross peen hammer out and whacked him on the head when he was on the toilet.

So many.

– WWF using parents bed as the ring. Mum walks in just as I’m using the wooden bedstead as a ring corner to bash his head into. Still has the scar.
– Somehow convincing him to hold a rugby ball while kneeling to attempt a place kick. Missed ball, kicked his groin. I will never forget his face as he wordlessly fell over.

These he barely remembers, or laughs about these days. Unfortunately, the fall out from his wedding damn near tore our family apart. Hey ho.

Convinced my 9 year old brother to empty out the contents of the fireworks onto the barbecue and light it.

I was in so much trouble. I still had both my eyebrows, though 😉

Rachel

Used to have an acquaintance in Newcastle, Tony, terrible drink as was his brother. They used to scrap something rotten, I do recall one if them breaking their arm during a fight.

Boisterous playing rather than fighting, but me and a friend once sealed his brother in a cardboard box and pretended to throw him down the stairs. Poor fella pissed his pants 🙁

I once tied my sister to a very hot radiator!
Well that is the story she told everyone for some 35 years before actually admitting she’d made it all up.

Shortly before that she slammed my glass bedroom door towards her and the entire pane cracked with the top half coming down like a guillotine and slicing a nice cut across her stomach. No toughened or laminated glass in a 1950’s bedroom door. This of course was entirely my fault.

Don’t know why I did this to this day but I remember it vividly…

When I was 6 I was having a proper stamping-around-yelling tantrum due to the attention my 4 year old sister was getting after her christening. Went for a walk round the local park with my dad and kicked everything in sight, letting off steam. Got back to the hall where everyone else was in a much better mood. Until a bit later where for some unknown reason I let out (what I thought was) a playful kick at my sister but caught her left leg wrong and managed to break it. And I mean properly break it, foot at the wrong angle broken. She didn’t cry or make any noise, just stared at me in complete bewilderment! Took a few seconds for my mum to realise what had just happened before someone ran over the road to grab the local doctor. I didn’t get into any trouble for it, eyewitnesses said it wasn’t a hard kick at all, just very unlucky. I did wait on her night and day for the next year though.

What made it even more bizarre is that before and since we’ve been more like best friends than brother/sister. We’ve never come to blows about anything before or since, the only thing I can remember is about 5 years ago I had a random hair growing out right between my eyebrows and she plucked it out. Unfortunately it was deeply embedded and took a chunk of skin about 3mm wide and deep with it! That bloody hurt, but I very much doubt it compares to having your leg broken by your brother 😳

Playing with my sisters, I kicked the youngest’s ball away. She was holding a small cricket bat at the time and hit me across the back of the head with it. I still remember staggering to my mother and sayin “she hit me”. I don’t recall anything else as I passed out.

Was playing tennis in the road (in the old days when you could play in the road without fear of being run over) with my sisters racket.
She chased me down the road and, when she caught up with me, yanked the racket from my hand. Somehow my finger was wedged between the it and the floor and her pulling it from me also pulled my finger nail clean off 😯

My brother got one of those spring loaded guns that fires suckered darts for his (IIRC) 6th birthday. I decided it was much more fun to stick two suckered darts together to create a pointy end and I called my brothers name as I released the trigger. He turned around, took the pointy arrow directly to the eye and we had to take him to hospital on his birthday for emergency treatment. He spent weeks walking around in an eye patch and even my assertions that he looked like a pirate didn’t really lift his mood.

A few years later he pushed me down the stairs mid argument and I ended up in hospital with concussion, so I think we’re equal. We are to this day, very good friends and close brothers.

Variously he tried to throw a knife at me and shoot me with the air rifle. I kicked him in the nuts and cut his ballsack, punched him in the nose so that he got a blood blister hanging down like a droopy elephant trunk and stamped on his hand as he’d fallen on the ground spraining his thumb.

My big sister decide it would be a good idea if I sat on the handlebars of MY bike while she rode it. I wasn’t keen but she was quite insistent! So with me aboard she wobbled up and down the road and then straight into our garden wall. This punted me through the privet hedge with the seat of my trousers still attached to the lamp bracket. Mum wasn’t best pleased.

My sister is three years older than me, so when I was 10, she was still much bigger and stronger than me.

One particular day we’d been fighting on and off for hours. She eventually sat on me and held my arms down whilst spitting in my face. She knew that if she got up I would release all Hell on her sorry ass, so she sat on me for over an hour.

Eventually, the phone rang, she got up to answer it and I punched her hard in the stomach. Guess who got grounded for a month.

My brother is 2.5 years older than me so I rarely got the better if him, but on one occasion I stamped on his head so hard a tooth came out. I then ran like bl00dy f&%k into the bathroom and locked the door as I really feared for my life.

As my parents were out at the time I was stuck in there for what seemed like hours, only creeping out once to get a pen and paper from my bedroom next door to make a sign saying ‘HELP, JOHN IS GOING TO KILL ME’ and banged on the glass as I saw them approaching so they could come in and save me.

As I was his Best Man, I told that story at his wedding too 🙂

Fighting with my sister she goes to the kitchen and grabs a big knife then comes back and lunges at me with it. I kicked the knife out of her hand which resulted in me breaking one of her fingers. She ends up in casualty and I end up getting a good hiding from me old man 😡

annoyed with my older brother for some reason, clobbered him from behind with broom with a full swing. I remember thinking at that point I might have overdone it. Brother now very very angry. Ran after me into house and didn’t stop even after I’d slammed the door shut. He went straight through the door window. Blood everywhere. Immediate realisation of the level of trouble i was now in. One of many trips to casualty.

johndoh – Member
My brother is 2.5 years older than me
… a sign saying ‘HELP, JOHN IS GOING TO KILL ME’ and

Wait, Your brother is called John? and you are also called John?

I once managed to convince my brother to jump into a ditch which had been dry for months. On this occasion it was wet and he didn’t realise until it was far too late.

Oh how I laughed. Children are evil.

Shot my brother out of a tree with a home made bow and arrow.. The arrow was stuck in his neck near his ear and fell about 6ft to land flat on his stomach. Luckily he was so winded he couldn’t scream as i pulled the arrow out and denied it to my parents as I got my story in first..

My friend’s big brother slammed his head in a door so he pushed him down the loft traphatch. Then it really kicked off and it almost finished in a stabbing.

I threw a dart in my older brother’s head. Once said dart had left my hand the only thing that crossed my mind was I hope it doesn’t miss him and hit the window behind cos that’d make a right mess.

I was a troubled child…

My brother and I used to try and knock 7 bells out of each other the whole time. On one occasion we ‘invented’ a new sport.
We were each armed with a ping pong bat and a dart from the proper darts set we were bought for Christmas.
The game started off with us throwing the dart gently underhand for the other brother to catch on the ping pong bat and then to throw back in the opposite direction once said dart was safely caught.
This rapidly progressed/escalated to synchronized throwing for a bit more skill….and then bodyline darts whereby the bat was now the only thing between our body and the dart.
Needless to say it ended in tears. Those of my brother who almost saved himself from a dart in the chest but ended up with the dart firmly embedded in bone of the middle finger of his hand. It didn’t bleed too much after a very firm yank to pull it out.
Nothing was said to my parents as the consequences would have been confiscation of all the equipment.
He now lives in Australia!

When I was about 10, we had a chocolate fondue (hey, it was the 1970s, everyone did it, right?) for dessert once. There were bits of fruit, biscuits and – best of all – marshmallows to dip into the delicious chocolate feast.

There was one marshmallow left. My six year old sister reached for it. My 8yo brother stabbed her in the back of the hand with the fondue fork, so that it stayed there, and calmly picked up the marshmallow and ate it after dipping it in chocolate. She still has the scar.

That is cold…

Golf club to the head. I still get bollocked for it 40 years later.

when I was about 7-8 my youger brother was swinging around a long length of armoured cable, a strand caught me on the calf and dug in. I have a big scar still

He got amnesia after an accident at the local diving boards. about 2 years on he was laying on the floor watching telly. I took a run up and hit him very hard in the face with a big heavy cushion. his head hit the floor and he got amnesia again.

We used to have an axe by the fire for cutting kindling, In a fight he hit me with it on the back below the shoulder blade and I still have the scar.

After one fight I was leaving as I was putting my shoes on he swang a baseball bat at me vertically, I put my arm up to block and it swelled up hugely but no harm done.

Ive no siblings but shopping with my mate and his missus one weekend after staying at theirs he decided in the middle of Aldi to swing a 4 pint bottle of milk about as I was walking directly behind him.

Deliberate act which caught me straight in the privates. Tears in my eyes for a while after that…. 😯

Eating tinned pears and cream at grannies i encouraged my 4 year old brother to use black pepper to enhance the taste of his desert, after taking a mouthful crying and calling granny I was then made to eat all the remaining desert, never eaten pears since.

Mum and dad away on holiday, we lasted 2-3 days without arguing (think possibly me 19 him 17). We then had an argument over beefburgers (yes, really!), cant quite remember what the actual argument was over but he was so enraged he threatened to throw the nearest thing to hand at me…an iron…so he lifted it above his head to throw, which of course just meant he got covered in water from said iron….I was in stitches, couldnt move with laughter until of course he picked up the next thing to hand which was a set of cricket stumps and started throwing them at me. if I remember rightly that was the same night he threw my bike in the local river, and walked to the nearest police station (about a mile) in his socks as I wouldnt turn the house alarm off.

My Sister wedged a claw hammer into my head when I was about 7. Lots of blood but no harm done.
I pushed my younger brother down a flight of steps as we were racing to get to the top first. Head / Granite interface and a rush to A & E . Had to hold a towel wrapped round his head to try to stop the blood, can still remember him waving his toothebrush at us from the hospital window..
Scared him for life .

My older brother hit me for some reason- I’ve no idea what- so I properly punched him as hard as I could the balls. He went absolutely radge, my dad ended up pinning him to the ground while he flailed around, spitting and headbutting the floor and making crazy animal noises, it was like he was possessed. Eventually- and I mean, about 5 minutes of total satanic mentalness later- he seemed to have calmed down, so dad let him up and he instantly came after me again… So I punched him as hard as I could in the balls. The circle of life!

To this day my dad can’t tell this story all the way through, he always breaks down at the second herculean ballpunch.

@deadslow and Teasel, I hit my little brother in the foot with a dart once. I was demonstrating how skilled I was at darts, and how I could throw it really close to his foot, obviously. He chased me around the garden and gave me a good kick, with the dartfoot- he didn’t realise it was still sticking out the top. I don’t think mum knew who to blame but she spent the entire time in casualty working on it.

I am starting to feel a lot better about my house of 3 boys!

My brother and I used to absolutely batter each other!

I’ve thrown darts at him which stuck

He’s thrown me down the stairs numerous times

He smashed a hole in the bedroom wall using my head

He cornered me and repeatedly punched me in the face. As my head bounced off the wall behind me, in came the next punch………….my arms flailed about looking for anything to defend myself. Weirdly the first thing that came to hand was a crowbar (I have no idea why there was a crowbar in the dining room). As soon as I got hold of it I swung it as hard as I could, caught him in the face and watched in slow motion as his teeth flew across the room. Everything soon sped up again as I ran straight upstairs to hide under my bed!

Oh and another time! Like the poster further up we were using our parents bed as a wrestling ring. I got thrown out of the “ring” and landed on the wooden floor. The Ultimate Warrior (my brother) bounced as high as he could and came down for an excellent elbow drop straight onto my head. A fractured skull ended that match!

I think it did us good tbh. We got all our violence and aggression out on each other early so in adult life we are now both pretty laid back guys and we are good friends too!

Mine was more psychological and unintentional to my younger cousin.

With my mates at 12 or 13 year old and young cousin of 8 was annoying. I told her she was adopted and should go away and think why her real parents didn’t want her.

Roll forward a decade and my cousin of 18 asks me what I know about her adoption and how she can find her real parents.

I have no memory of the original conversation so she explains in excruciating detail how for the last ten years she feels her life has been a lie and she has never felt her parents could be trusted as they never mentioned her adoption.

Whoops.

She is now 37 and will talk to me if we are in the same building

My brother and I were always fighting when we were young. He hit me on the head once with a hammer cutting it open. Stopped fighting with me when I got bigger than him, he’s 4 yrs older than me.

gave me a good kick, with the dartfoot

🙂

But… Deadslow, bro! I had no idea you posted on this forum… 😉