Don’t murder everyone that you really hate at work with an axe.

Cracking wisdom. 🙂

Never rub another man’s rhubarb

one from a good friend, albeit in German:

mit der Zeit wird jede Frau von Singletrail zum Schotterweg.

(with time, all women turn from single trails into fireroads)

i don’t need a job, i need money.

(have it printed on a t-shirt)

Pain is weakness leaving the body

When you leave school you dont leave all the children in the playground, they just become your workmates and the bullies become management.

A hammer hurts more than words when your annoyed by an ignorant,thick,bullying workmate, who threatens you.

Its not what you know, its what you know about important people you know.

Love many, trust few. Always paddle your own canoe.
😉

My favourite is the prayer of serenity, though I dislike the god angle so tend to omit it. I use it as an anger management/stand back and think mantra when things go a little skew whiff…

I have the strength to change the things I can
The courage to accept the things I can’t
And the wisdom to know the difference

…or something like that.

No problem is an orphan.

even the smallest of dreamers can realise the biggest of dreams

Any variation on the theme:

If it was easy it wouldn’t be interesting.

Ringfence the unicorn.

“Do a Hutton”

🙁

teamhurtmore – Member

“Do a Hutton”

Become the father of Geology? Schweeeet!

Oh, the other Hutton. 😕

If it was easy they wouldn’t be paying you to do it!

Calm down.

Evening Julian, couldn’t pass the words of the tanned one (no, not Vernon Kaye) without comment.

When I was a young, up and coming fell runner with Clayton le Moors Harriers I was advised ” never wear gloves, it will make you soft. 🙂

A secret is only secret if you tell NO-ONE!

Never trust a fart.

The longer you leave something before cleaning it, the harder it will be to clean.

Life is not a rehearsal.
How I wish I’d taken that onboard 30 years ago. Anyone know where the reset button is?

‘The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it’ is one I’ve always liked…

‘rubber up on any internet date’ is probably more relevant and useful however…

F*ck them before they f*ck you harder.

Buy cheap, buy twice.

Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.

“Do not look for the road to happiness but know that happiness is the road”

“Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is interesting but what they hide is vital”

Never pick a fight with someone carrying a knuckleduster, especially if there’s more than one of them.

I’d have a few more teeth if I’d followed that one.

Old enough to know better, young enough not to care.

And Thompsons:
“Life is not a journey to the grave with intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming … WOW! What a ride!”

thegreatape – Member

Never trust a fart.
…on a dicky stomach

If you can keep your head, whilst all those around you are losing theirs,
you may not have grasped the gravity of the situation.

You can shear a sheep many times, but you can only skin it once.

If it flys, floats or ****, rent it don’t buy it

Life is a journey not a destination.

It’s all part of the fun. (My riding mates reckon they’re having this on my tombstone. I must say it a lot, especially when slogging through snow/rain/mud/headwinds/up hills)

It’s what you do that matters: not what you have.

If its got tyres or tits it’ll be expensive.

To the ant’s, we’re just weather 🙂

**** em all, bar four. They can carry the stretcher.

You can’t buy authenticity

If in doubt, give it a clout.

It’ll be alright in the end, & if it’s not alright then it’s not yet the end.

if you can’t take the ball, take the man

“Few things matter very much, and most things don’t matter at all”
A J Balfour (- I think, I’m too lazy to check)

Don’t go out in the rain in your socks