harry
niether just bruising from forcing one thru a 1/2" wide gap
then pulling it out again 😯

I have been crying with laughter at this thread 😀

so have I, unfortunately my boss is wondering what is so funny in the legal docs I'm meant to be reviewing!

please have some saved up for tomorrow!

I was riding round Queen Elizabeth park one midweek afternoon at about 3pm. As i winched my way round a corner a young lady was squatting by the side of the track . She could have moved about 5 meters away into the trees, but no, shes having a wee right next to the South Downs Way. She spots me pretty quick and quickly pulls up her troos and walks down hte hill toward me. The poor thing was bright red with embasrressment, and she had a very small baby in one of those front loading papoose things that the trendy young uns use.

Not a sh@gging story, but one year whilst doing the SPC we came across a guy playing bagpipes, he was miles from anywhere no idea how he got there, another time my brother and i were just finishing off a day riding the quantocks and we did the ford at the far of the 'tocks he got half wat across and hit a submerged kerbstone and went clean over the bars in the river, it was 5 years ago and i still laugh today about it.Then when we where the lakes big andy and opposed to little andy ,missed the edge of the path, went down the shallow drop landed upside stuck in his spds but after we stopped laughing and freed him we saw that he had ripped a huge hole in the arse of his shorts, but he thought it as a small hole and when returned to the bb he bent over to show the lady of the house and waved everything at her luckily she was nurse and was nonplussed

One for all you Cranham riders.

At the bottom of the Popes wood bridle track (one from the top of the beacon past the back of the Royal William) there was a skin coloured 12" dildo.

It was hilarious, me and my friend could not believe it. I have a picture somewhere but wont post it as its a family site.

On a bridleway in Danbury at about 3pm with all the milfs walking their dogs enjoying the fresh air. I rounded a corner to find a Toyota Hilux parked in the middle of the trail. There was a pair of feet in pink socks pressed against the window and a hairy arse bobbing up and down between them 😆

I was riding alond a creek in late February 2 years ago when, having just ridden around a bend, I noticed a massive hole in the path. It was muddy so I decided to unclip and carefully ride past it. I did, well, unclipped my right foot and put the left one down. You should've seen faces at Wickes 15 mins later where I was buying some bulbs 😀

There was also a couple at it down the alleyway leading from Feltham train station along the tracks to the level crossing. Around 3.30 pm midweek.

A few years back while doing the selkirk merida, my mate says he needs a shit so goes off into the bushes just before the last big climb, so we leave him to it and proceed up the climb, while eating our grub at the top, he comes up over the hill all red faced and tells us he just farted for five minutes, still makes me laugh today and i though my stomach muscles were going to cramp up with laughter at the time.

At Penmachno a few weeks back we were riding up a fireroad climb and encountered two guys fettling with their bikes by the side of the trail. Strangely though, there were three bikes, but seemingly only two riders.

As we looked over and asked if everything was okay, we noticed another rider, no more than six feet away from them and right on the open edge of the treeline, braced over a fallen tree and crimping one off.

We assumed they were all part of the same group 🙂

It followed that after that, every time our group stopped to reassemble, someone would say, "'Scuse me lads..", mime dropping their kecks and squatting to lay a cable. This act continued back to the campsite and into the pub later that evening.

Riding through Trossachs I happened upon a guy getting a BJ off his woman friend.
Right out in the middle of nowhere so it was an agonising few moments for them until I passed by.

I really did laugh out loud.

heading home from the sidlaws one autumn night 2 years ago – dropped down to the carpark by the white farm house.

Mate says – stick lights out … so we did , rode down the ditch to the carpark like normal and saw the car with light on ……

rode up , lights on …cue very startled womans head like a rabbit caught in headlights and lots of shrieking

being caught in the middle of no where giving the mr (i presume) a BJ – priceless

it was an agonising few moments for them until I passed by.

She was probably doing it wrong. I don't think it's meant to be like that for the man at least.