Viewing 19 posts - 1 through 19 (of 19 total)
  • What's the best thing Santa has said to you?
  • rthomas17
    Free Member

    I’m being Santa tonight at the school fare – need some decent patter – anyone recall some killer Claus quotes?

    mogrim
    Full Member

    “Come and sit on my knee, big boy”

    rthomas17
    Free Member

    Tried that last year, but knee-sitting is outlawed.

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middlin...
    Latest Singletrack Videos
    iDave
    Free Member

    ‘I’ll check if the factory in China still exists and get back to you’

    wombat
    Full Member

    “Yes, I agree, she is quite a foxy elf. Do you want to see some pictures of her with Prancer & Dancer?” 😈

    alfabus
    Free Member

    pretty sure I’m getting a new thomson stem and some easton haven carbon bars from santa.

    could get expensive if you start promising that to every kid though 🙂

    Dave

    themountaingoat
    Free Member

    Stand there while I empty my full sack .

    barnsleymitch
    Free Member

    Look at this – isnt that the purplest thing youve ever seen?

    Cougar
    Full Member

    I believe “ho ho ho” is traditional.

    rthomas17
    Free Member

    see that’s the problem – all the funny stuff is likely to get me dragged outside by the parents for a beating.

    wrecker
    Free Member

    Isnt it the law that santas are blotto?

    mastiles_fanylion
    Free Member

    I’m gonna come down your chimney and fill your stockings.

    Cougar
    Full Member

    “and in order to get your gifts to you, I’ll need mummy’s phone number…”

    Nobby
    Full Member

    I think his exact words were “it’s almost impossible to go for a p1ss in this f***ing costume”.

    piedidiformaggio
    Free Member

    Just announce you’re wearing stockings & suspenders under the santa outfit

    yetidave
    Free Member

    he liked my “MO” when I met him last week! 😯

    donsimon
    Free Member

    It actually is a banana! You can imagine my relief. 😛

    mattk
    Free Member

    I organised a Christmas event once and got a bloke from work to be Santa.

    A few of his classics were

    Santa “What would you like Christmas”
    Little girl “Can i have a bike please”
    Santa “Hmmm i don’t have any bikes, but i do know quite a few”

    Little boy walks in with an Aston villa shirt on
    Santa “Right you can bugger off”

    Little girl walks in and is very shy
    Mother (looking apologetic) “Don’t you want to sit on Santa’s lap?”
    Santa “Oh don’t worry, your mum can sit on my lap instead”

    It was a miracle we didn’t have any complaints, but it was nothing compared to when we got him to be the easter bunny!

    bikebouy
    Free Member

    “I Luv Your Mum”

Viewing 19 posts - 1 through 19 (of 19 total)

The topic ‘What's the best thing Santa has said to you?’ is closed to new replies.