900cc Fiat Siecento, 39bhp screamed at me to stop at anything more than 85mph(saw over 100 down a hill on M62).

Crackin little car though got 2 f/s bikes and a weekends tent n kit in it.

A Fiat 126, 650cc, 21bhp, no official figure for 0-60mph but in real life it was approx. 45secs. Makes my Pug feel like an F1 car.

My parents had a 2CV, god that was an awful car, fugly, stupid gear stick, and definitely the slowest I've ever had the misfortune to drive. The day they phoned me up and told me it had caught fire and was a write off was one of the happiest days of my life 🙂

My own slowest? Probably the Corsa, though it wasn't really that bad.

ive only had 2 cars.

current 2L HDi 206 estate.
zoom zoom, only 90bhp, but 230NM of Torque (156ft/lbs ish) with its giganormous turbo*
3k revs is all you get.

previously, a 997cc Kia Picanto.
AWESOME little car,
guttless doesnt cover it, but it reved SO fast it was actually quite quick.
destroyed everything off the line, until it got to third gear, where it gave up.
little blip of the throttle and it was at 7krevs in an instant. weighs nothing, and it handled like a gokart.
zip zip!

(*giganormous turbo is in comparison to the works vans, where the turbo gives you "more power" all the way up to 5k revs. the 206 gives you the same power, but between 2k and 2.4k revs, in one big ugly, suspension ruining lump)

Old mini. Rover 400. Old Holden Kingswood (lucky to reach 60mph despite being a 6 cylinder).

My parents had a 2CV, god that was an awful car, fugly, stupid gear stick

mogrimnwhat is stupid about the gear stick in a 2cv? Its in a different place to most 'normal' cars but other than thats its straightforward. User error maybe?

Austin Allegro Estate. 1.3 A series engine very slow but held loads of gear and big enough to sleep in comfortably with the seats down.

3 ltr sraight 6 opel senator, 90 mph topps.
1980 APC 432 APV 2 gallon per mile,top speed 40 mph ish, noisy no heater. only avail in green / black or( black / white if you were in berlin).massive boot tho

With out a doubt our 1982 1.9L T25 camper, especially at the moment as the vac advance on the dizzy is fubarred – saw 75 out of it once, but that was downhill with the wind behind!! Much happier sitting at 60!!

Still great fun tho'

1985 Mazda Familia (323) wagon, 1500 cc of feeble but reliable oomph, was a jap import and as such came with a 'slow down atron' alarm which kicked in at 100km/h. "bing bing bing bing bing" .jesus there were some long slow trips on that thing.

MK1 Vauxhall Chavalier 1600. I crashed that thing so many times and each time my Dad helped/made me rebuild it, even after a lorry ran into it on the M4 one night. It needed the tappets doing after virtually every drive. Happy days.

S3 LWB Land rover with the 2.6l 6 cyl motor. Drove two in different jobs, both nice and smooth but struggled to reach 50. On the plus side one managed to keep going on 3 pots after the cam shaft snapped and punched a hole in the side of the block. Performance was so bad we didn't notice until the oil light came on.

Early 110 with the 2.5l naturally asthmatic diesel was a close second.

959 pop fiesta when 17yrs old.

Had XR2 pepper pots too. Slowest but probably most fun to drive as it was so bare and fixable-down the scrappie with ghia interiors etc.

Not mine but same colour/shape with 4 speed gear box lol 44bhp and 1000bhp off a cliff:

1965 Ford Anglia Super E with three speed gearbox and optional interior light. On the original cross ply tyres with a genuine 23,000 on the clock and the £400 reciept that it cost when it was new. What a car 0-60 over a length of 10 miles of motorway and similar braking distance unless you dropped it into 2nd to lock the rear wheels…………remenicies……..

On paper a 1989 Landy 110 TDi, claimed about 18 secs to 60, would do about that and once hit 85mph.

Actual slowest 1998 Mondeo 1.8TD, claimed 13 secs to 60. Fully loaded with three bikes and two people we timed it 28! Would do a ton though if it had a long enough run up.

what is stupid about the gear stick in a 2cv?

Symptom of the small-minded nature of most people. Give them a situation which is slightly out of their normal expectation, even if there are numerous benefits, or design reasons for those differences, and they will decry it as "just shit". The 2CV gearchange is fundamentally in the same place and operated the same way as a current Honda Civic, FR-V, and others. It was just there about 50 years earlier, and a bit odd to some people.

You'll still struggle to find a slower car though. 29BHP and the aerodynamic qualities of a narrow shed.

My 2.5 litre SWB Landy. 45-ish was about as much as she would go (when the clutch / starter / cooling system was working!). Great fun though. I'm considering extracting her from the shed she's been in for the last 5 years and bringing the old girl back to life.

what is stupid about the gear stick in a 2cv? Its in a different place to most 'normal' cars but other than thats its straightforward. User error maybe?

Au contraire, I could operate the damn thing. And I do appreciate that it's an old design.

However being different is not necessarily a good thing – when pretty much every other car on the market has a gear stick that works one way, it's quite possible that a different design is actually a bad thing…

A dead heat between the folks' non-Tdi Landy 90 (ex MOD) – remember having to go for 2nd up a not-that-steep hill once whilst 4-up – and the hateful 3 speed auto Toyota Corolla we had on hols in Florida last summer. Engine volume has no relation to speed…

Triumph Herald convertible. Smoked too much if i took it over 90km/h, but who cares when it looks so cool.

Citreon AX 1.4 diesel. Horrific car

took all day to start and smoked more than Dot Cotton

1.6 Cavalier (1989 I think, one of the last of the old square shaped ones), 4 speed manual… utter shite, but I loved it!

or

1.9 TD Suzuki Grand Vitara. Current car, slow as hell but it drives so well. If you keep the speed up it will take corners surprisingly well (the trick is not to let the speed drop once you have it!)

However being different is not necessarily a good thing – when pretty much every other car on the market has a gear stick that works one way, it's quite possible that a different design is actually a bad thing…

try telling apple that.

I loved my 2CV. Left hand drive didn't make much difference as it was so narrow. Central locking in that you could reach all 4 locks from the driving seat. The drivers door window would come open when you hit a bump. Reverse gear was so hard to engage, I'd only go down streets I could do a U-turn. Starter motor was dodgy but it was really easy to push then jump in.
It'd do 70mph, you just need to rev a lot and keep them high.

I'm considering going back to an Aygo. I dont care if its slow on paper- it was sooooooo much fun 😀

current car- 1.3 Suzuki Swift gls, fine until you find a hill….then its max 40mph 😀

2cv in yellow and black. My first car. Still remember going down the motorway one hand on the wheel the other holding the door – doors flapped madly above 60mph.

hora – Member
Citreon Dyane. God I loved it.

I loved mine also. The perfect piss poor climbers car.

Loved the way it revved /shook like a washing machine but didnt actually move that much 😆

I (or rather my missus) had a Suzuki SJ410. Never went above 55mph even downhill. Even 55mph is a bit of guess because the speedo needle wobbled by 20mph so it might have been 65 but more likely 45.

SJ410- when we were younger my mate fancied himself as a 'Rally Driver' – on the back roads over Huddersfield at silly speeds it bounced MORE (and alot) than it actually moved!!

My Fiat Panda 4X4 is ridiculously slow! But it absolutely loves the snow! Gets up anything, including our very twisty, steep and icy drive! Beats the Discovery 3 easily!

Suzuki Cappuccino.

The best fast, slow car I have ever owned. It was limited to 83 mph, but felt much faster than that, and drove better than just about every other sports car I have driven to date.

when pretty much every other car on the market has a gear stick that works one way

But what I'm saying is that it works the same way as any gearstick, it's just in a different place. I can't really see what's so bad about it.

39hp in 1985.
Probably somewhat less in 2001.
Also frequently went 0mph as it wouldn't start.

Talking to a lad in Mythlroyd today and he has a 4×4 Citreon Dyane. Same engine but with a diff etc to the rear wheels 😀

Another ex-Dyane owner here.

My first car and I really loved it.

Comfy, handled very well (YES THEY DO!) cheap to run and repair, and IMHO very, very cool.

Mine had a mix of red and blue panels and smelled strongly of mildew, but the 'Vote for Commissioner Gordon' sticker on the rear bumper and the ability to four wheel drift round steep downhill corners made up for that (it helped if you had a large friend stand in the passenger footwell, grab each of the windscreen pillars and exaggerate the lean angle).

God, I miss that car and would love another, but can't justify the money for a restored one.

1980 Fiesta 1.3S (first car)
1990 Metro 1.0 bought for £300 quid from mate- lasted a year

A Talbot Avenger that, as a callow youth, I inherited from the previous LG when he, sadly, went to meet his maker. I sent a letter to make an appointment for the damn thing to do 0 – 60mph but, 30yrs later, I'm still waiting for a reply.